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What's the Most Absurd Claim you've heard at a Car Show, Drag Race, Cruise Night, etc

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by DaveyJonez, Mar 5, 2009.

  1. DaveyJonez
    Joined: Feb 20, 2006
    Posts: 412

    DaveyJonez
    ALLIANCE MEMBER
    from Houston

    In the spirit of the guy w/ the street driven, 2000 pound, 70's Mopar Wedge powered, 6 second (in the quarter mile), 27 T Bucket-

    What is the most outrageous claim you've heard @ a car event.

    As part of one of my sponsorship agreements, I used to have to do alot of displays w/ my A/ Fuel Dragster- perfect forum for outrageous claims.

    The best had to be:

    "My sister used to date Don Gay Sr. in the early 70's, and he used to pick her up and take her to the drive-in in his Fuel Funnycar, which we just loved...":(

    Let's hear 'em
     
  2. Mazooma1
    Joined: Jun 5, 2007
    Posts: 13,598

    Mazooma1
    Member

    My sister used to date Don Gay Sr. in the early 70's, and he used to pick her up and take her to the drive-in in his Fuel Funnycar, which we just loved...

    My brother used to date a guy named Don, who was gay and he used to pick his nose and take him to a driveway in his gas unfunny car which we hated.
     
    shown50 likes this.
  3. hahahahaha!!!
     
  4. chevy57dude
    Joined: Dec 10, 2007
    Posts: 6,148

    chevy57dude
    Member

    More than one guy has INSISTED that early Corvettes had metal bodies! One guy even had a 'vette, no amount of proof would convince these people.
     

  5. T McG
    Joined: Feb 12, 2005
    Posts: 1,255

    T McG
    Member
    from Phoenix

    The best one I've heard..... My Ford will beat your Chevy, ha ha ha ha
     
  6. 61bone
    Joined: Feb 12, 2005
    Posts: 890

    61bone
    Member

    Guy told me he got a ride on A.J. Foyts boat and they only took it up to 300mph but it had a lot left. Haad two jet engines and flew over the water
    Note: WSR 317
     
  7. pastlane
    Joined: Oct 4, 2007
    Posts: 1,063

    pastlane
    Member

    " I built the whole car by myself, in my own garage behind the house"
     
  8. gpa
    Joined: Jul 28, 2006
    Posts: 38

    gpa
    Member
    from lewis,co.

    How about the dipshit that did nothing but write the check that hangs out and tells everyone "how he built the car". Those fuckers couldnt build a peanut butter sandwich!!!
     
    396/425, Deuces, LOU WELLS and 2 others like this.
  9. When I was in high school (20 yrs ago) I overheard a guy with a stock Iroc Z28 Camaro braggin' to some friends that the car would pull the wheels off the ground when he stood on it.

    It's been 20 years and when I think about it I still wan't to smack him...
     
    Deuces likes this.
  10. ss34coupe
    Joined: May 13, 2007
    Posts: 4,169

    ss34coupe
    Member

    "you bet this car is all metal" as you look at the 15 empty gallon cans of bondo sitting behind his shop.
     
  11. Perhaps not outrgeous, but nauseating and tiresome is that every small block chevy is a "327/375 out of a vette" even though it has never been within a 1/4 mile of a fuellie unit! Just as ignorant is: every big block chevy is a "427 vette". some are the rare "tri-power L-88 mills"! Every SBC has "camel humps and 4 bolt mains" every BBC is a "square port". I am trying to wean myself from that nonsense crowd of idiots,kept me from attending car shows for time-that is why I joined the HAMB,real gearhead hoodlums with facts and knowledge-Amen.
     
    junkman73, 396/425 and LOU WELLS like this.
  12. I've heard plenty...But the one I remember the most,was when me and my buddy went to Paso with his glass '37 Ford. These guys kept arguing with him that it was a steel car,they knew what they were talking about,and pointed at another friends car and said "that's a glass car! See the difference?". The other car was a steel car,LOL!!!!

    Heard a guy telling a potential buyer that his car ran low 8's and was his daily driver. 70 something Duster,318cu,air cond,street radials,air shocks,rear shackles,hahahaha!!!
     
  13. superglide
    Joined: Jul 30, 2008
    Posts: 46

    superglide
    Member

    i went to school with a kid whose older brother had a pretty neat 67 camaro. they put on a set of traction bars and i asked him if they were going to do some drag racing. he said "nope, we put them on because at 160mph the front end comes off the ground" he didnt deserve that car.
     
    Deuces likes this.
  14. "This is a traditional hot rod."
     
  15. Fighter-of-Wars
    Joined: Nov 3, 2008
    Posts: 294

    Fighter-of-Wars
    Member

    Buddy of mine at school has a 60s Ford Galaxy with what he says when someone asks him and we are standing with by it with the hood up. "Yeah, its got a 351 modified big block 400. I got a Holley Double Pumper on it, racing cam, high performance heads, see look how big them heads are. Yeah I got around 10 grand in the motor alone, when I get a bigger carb its gunna be a 460 Big Block. Thats when I said he was full of shit.

    I look at it and all I see is a chromed out spray painted engine. He lives close to me and I decide to follow him home one day. I start riding his bumper one day and all of a sudden I see a cloud of black smoke come out of the bottom of it, and it pulls away slowly. I'm in my 79 Cougar, basically stock with some block work. and I catch up quickly. Next day at school he says. "Man it was pretty crazy going 120 down that road with you right behind me." I look at him funny and say that we were only going 75-80. He didn't know what to say.
     
  16. DirtyThirty
    Joined: Mar 8, 2007
    Posts: 2,396

    DirtyThirty
    Member
    from nowhere...

    "They'll never get a car to hook on radials"
    "A 351 WINDSOR??!! You need a Cleveland"
    "time-slips don't prove anything"...actually heard that one on here!:D
     
  17. TurboHaddix
    Joined: Jan 10, 2009
    Posts: 184

    TurboHaddix
    Member

    My K&N Filter adds 25 horsepower.
     
  18. DirtyThirty
    Joined: Mar 8, 2007
    Posts: 2,396

    DirtyThirty
    Member
    from nowhere...

    Oh, Yeah...and the most outrageous of all: "Super Gas is FUN to watch"...:rolleyes:
     
  19. cheezwiz
    Joined: Oct 11, 2008
    Posts: 170

    cheezwiz
    Member

    Some OLD guy walked up to a GLASS 33 roadster I owned at the time (FOR SALE!) , knocked on the fender and said "THEY DON'T BUILD 'EM LIKE THAT ANYMORE !"
     
    LOU WELLS likes this.
  20. TurboHaddix
    Joined: Jan 10, 2009
    Posts: 184

    TurboHaddix
    Member

    Oh, and "If it ain't steel it ain't real."
     
  21. SOCAL PETE
    Joined: Oct 19, 2006
    Posts: 1,204

    SOCAL PETE
    Member
    from Ramona CA

    Over heard by my wife. Whilst standing in line to get an ice cream at Barona Drags...some youngster pipes up to his girl friend. "that right there is my favorite chevy but to bad its got a Ford motor in it." The car was a Black 56 Fairlane with big blue oval sticker on each door......oh! the restraint she displayed.
     
  22. pecker head
    Joined: Nov 8, 2006
    Posts: 3,825

    pecker head
    Member

    I heard one this week! If your gonna give all the trophies to RAT RODS ! Im gonna quit coming to the show!


    later Peck !
     
  23. striper
    Joined: Mar 22, 2005
    Posts: 4,498

    striper
    Member

    Friend of mine used to claim he had a big block 350 in his boat. I told him it was a small block but he insisted that with 4 bolt mains it was a big block. OK, what do I know. Most embarrassing thing was standing near him while he told others about his big block 350. Slowly move away. I think it was only a 2 bolt anyway.

    When I was a kid, a slightly older guy was telling a group of us about a van (it was the 70s) his friend had with a 427 in it with six lights in the console that lit up as each of the 6 cylinders fired. I wish I was better at calling "bullshit". I usually just switch off or leave.

    Pete
     
  24. banjorear
    Joined: Jul 30, 2004
    Posts: 3,845

    banjorear
    Member

    There is this douche that goes to every and I mean every cruise-in event by me. I call him Shades for he is always wearing Richard Petty-type pre-Bono from U2 style sunglasses. He'll talk your freakin' ear off if you let him.

    Anyway, he was telling me a story once about his clapped out 307 powered '72 Chevelle. I'm a fairly patient person and I'll bullshit just like the next guy, but this is were I just plain walked away from this dude in mid-sentence.

    "Yeah, it was at 125 mph when I shifted into 4th" Shades, Summer of '07
     
  25. carkiller
    Joined: Jun 12, 2002
    Posts: 849

    carkiller
    Member

    Personal favorite, In 1980 I chop and lower my daily driver 60 ford pu. Cant/tunnel the headlites roll the front pan, teardrop the turn signals ect. about a week out of my shop a guy chases me down. starts telling me he knows the guy that built it. I ask who this guy is? He tells me. I kinda know the guy so I drive over to his place, He answers the door I climp his ass. He looks at me and says (all customizers lie) and closes the door.
     
  26. 32SEDAN
    Joined: Jul 30, 2008
    Posts: 1,294

    32SEDAN
    Member

    "Is that some kind of kit car?"

    "My friend has one just like it..."

    "Won't the police give you a ticket for not having fenders?"
     
    Last edited: Jul 3, 2014
  27. TurboHaddix
    Joined: Jan 10, 2009
    Posts: 184

    TurboHaddix
    Member

    You climped his ass? What does that mean?

    I heard a preacher tell a story behind the pulpit about powershifting into 2nd gear at 90mph in a street race once.
     
  28. I've always loved the stories guys tell of their uncle / friend's / dad's 1960 something Oldsmo-Buick luxo-barge with a 350 big block / Corvette engined / Rocket - with a 4 barrel and dual exhaust that they borrowed one night and managed to get it up to 140 (or more). Occassionally while still in second gear, always a lot more left and usually still accelerating.

    Funny, everytime I tried something like that, the car crapped out around 100 and the front end got scary light.

    These are usually the same guys with tired 350 Camaros who think all it takes to pull the wheels is a 4 barrel and a set of headers. Come to think of it... it might be the same guys who talk about the 140 mph luxo-barge
     
    Last edited: Jan 10, 2019
    Atwater Mike likes this.
  29. A Father and son were at my swap meet stall and the kid was pointing out parts and commenting on them, the dad asked him how he new about that and he replyed " I'm a kid, I know everything". guess ya had to be there.
    Oh yes and there is the ledgendary 396 SS Nova that would pull a wheel stand in second gear that everybody had in high school.
     
  30. moparforlife
    Joined: Feb 21, 2009
    Posts: 351

    moparforlife
    Member
    from Rolla, MO

    not really hamb friendly but i had a guy ask me if i bought my '69 super bee as a kit, as in did it come in a box to my door and then i put it together

    also had a guy tell me he pegged the speedometer of his grandmas stock 273 powered '64 valiant at 150 mph, last time i checked '64 valiant speedos only went to 110 i believe, and plus i agree with saxxon, around 100 those terrible aerodynamics start to come in and front ends tend to get real light
     

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