Stuff you've learned the hard way

If you don't have time to do it right, you will have time to do it over. Ditto 61Tbird.

 

Always pack your own parachute. main AND reserve!
Henry Ford steel is stronger than the bones in my foot.
Doc.

 

The oil pump drive hole in a 400 SBC rear main is smaller than one in other small blocks so you can't drop in drive after installing pan.

 

Money LOANED to friends and family should be considered gifts. You'll feel better when they don't pay you back.

Using the right tool conserves blood, skin and you don't have ugly scars. From this comes from the paradigm that using the wrong tool ALWAYS results in broken auto parts or people parts.

Never use a two bladed axe as a hammer...and if you do, don't be the one holding the stake to be hammered. And if you do...don't drink a 12 pack before you start. I just heard this story...really...no, really.

Punching glass covered pictures when angry often results in scars and surgery.

Refrigerators are not diving boards and roll-away beds are not swimming pools and the resulting scars last for life. (i was 4 then and can be forgiven for being stupid)

 

unless of course you dont want to hear or see from them for a few years ive used this method more than a few times!!

 

Also, if you're wearing gloves, the melted material sticks and remains hotter for longer

 

Or in the states known as a "box end wrench". Just think of it as a handy built-in tool if you ever need to remove them.

 

Never Drink too much around Joe Paposey at Goodguys.

Never put an engine together with out checking the bearings

Never buy a spring behind axle kit form speedway

Never put air ride on your daily driver if you live in the midwest

Never teach your girl to drive stick in a way over powered hot rod pick up

Never Vote Obama.

 

Don't use a stick welder while standing in a puddle.......................

 

A bench grinder on a stand shouldn't be located in front of the garage window. Eventually it will grab a part and chuck it through the glass....twice.

 

Dont trust some people..even if they are family (inlaws)
dont loan money. dont loan tools, dont work for free,
once a person proves to you they are trash, never give them the benifit of doubt.
Dont trust a woman who doesnt have custody of her own child.
when someone threatens you or your family take care of the problem swiftly and decisively, do not wait for them to follow up on the threat.
dont buy something that if you could wait long enough you might get it for free.
when someone tells you there going to do something and it isnt done when its supposed to be done, never allow that person to bullshit you again, and call them on it the next time they think you werent paying attention.

 

NEVER ever try to assemble a SBF from various motor parts unless you got the timing cover, water pump, balancer, pulleys and any related brackets from the same motor.

The money you tried to save by buying "close" to what you want nearly always ends up costing more in the end than if you had just bought the right part/tool to begin with.

 

Never drill a firewall without checking what's on the other side (it may be a very expensive ECU). Carburetors and fire extinguishers are always installed as a set. The factory did it that way for a reason. MIG wire goes into your leg easier than it comes out. "Rebate" is money the seller adds to the price. "Free Accessory" is money the seller adds to the price. "We Pay The Sales Tax" is money the seller.... Do anything to keep a great wife happy. Some day you'll realize your father was a genius, but it will be too late to tell him so.

 

Funny little kid pics, I will show those to my wife for sure (I have two kids below the age of 3)...

My list:
-Never lend tools out, not only do folks forget to give them back, but I can't remember who I lent them to
-When starting a manual trans car in gear, don't have a brain fart and take your foot off the clutch while talking to someone outside the car and hit the side of their garage
-That funny noise coming from the car, won't magically self heal itself while you are driving it.
-Yes something is burning. That's not someone else's car, that's your car and something is on fire. When it backfired out the carb the aircleaner filter caught on fire John.
-Not a good idea to drive forward in that parking lot John, there are those concrete stops and you just drove over one and the oil pan of your Mustang is now resting on it.
-That u-turn at 40mph was a bad idea.
-Neutral drops are like russian roulette, just a matter of time before you blow it up.
-Never do daily-driver car maintenance at 10PM on a Sunday night, nothing is open if you buy the wrong part, and have stripped out the bolts on the old rust POS part that you took three hours to pull off.

 

Everyone has a price, even you, but it's up to you to decide how high you'll go...

oh, and always listen to yer fathers, they know whats best 99% of the time

 

I can eat my height in meat.





No shit.

~Jason

 

When your at the swap meet bargining the price of the newly painted chevrolet orange big block always trust that the sign on top of it that reads FRESH is 100% true>>>>.

 

Go as far as you can to buy the car you really want the first time around.
Its the little stuff, nuts, bolts, zip-ties, cleaner, wire connectors, ect that can kill your budget if you dont keep track of it.

 

To not marry a girl just because she's smokin' hot and makes your buddies jealous. All the while thinking you'll find things in common sometime down the road. Never, under any circumstances follow this course of action. Painfull and expensive misery will follow.

 

Don't rinse off engine degreaser with a pressure washer.

And...

 

Keep the receipts....NEVER add them up.

That vibration in the a) front end
b) rear end
c) motor at a given RPM
will NOT "just go away"

If the thought crosses your mind that "this is gonna hurt" while doing something....it will.

Know where the nearest beer store is, when it closes, and how long it takes to make the trip

 

A steering wheel puller is a good idea. Two black eyes and a swollen nose is not.

 

The fuel pump on an old GM inline six WILL bolt on UPSIDE DOWN.

Always put a battery cable in the vise when trying to enlarge the hole on the bolt end. Holding it in your left hand and inserting the drill with your right will end up getting you a 10% discount on a manicure.

 

when i hear buck cherry sing "crazy bitch" i think of her.[/quote]
Buck Cheery He's my favorite>>>>.

 

Before jumping a battery (caps on top type) always clean off any of the acid residue on the top of the battery. This stuff will EXPLODE!!!! the battery if a spark hits it.

 

Always wash your hands before taking a pee, after you have used aircraft stripper. Also, remember a healthy crab can jump 6 feet. Keep that in mind next time you're in the titty bar.

 

Mock-up everything before you weld everything together or powdercoat it. Welded some shock tabs to a straight axle for my awb and sent it for powercoat, then found out that the tabs kept the steering arm from turning left.

 

Never buy a car off a picture.......especially a polaroid.

 

A fully-assembled BBC, when mounted to a three-wheeled engine stand, and tied to one side of a pickup bed, WILL flip out of said bed and cave in the bed side when one turns a corner.