This week 9-9 through 9-15 is National Suicide Prevention week, and to all those Fathers out there I want to take this moment to remind them to talk to their siblings and make sure everything is well with them. We lost our 43 year old son over 3 1/2 years ago and there is not a day or moment that goes by that he is not in my thoughts or my wife's. Those that take this route to end their life really do not have a clue on just what they are leaving behind or what the ramifications of their decision will be. I know my son thought he was making the best decision for his circumstances but it was not. I would not wish this on my worst enemy, and that is the truth. So for you out there that have a son or daughter who is not right with this world, please take the time to help them all you can get them whatever help they need. It is better than the alternative. I would surely rather have him with me at the races than have his old work shirt riding along with me in the cab. You will always be in our hearts Michael my son.......................
Carl, Thanks for bringing this to the attention of all, thanks for sharing with all ...... and so sorry for your loss. My family lost one to suicide, after surviving and returning home from Viet Nam. Imagine getting thru Viet Nam, only to snuff out life, back in the states. We then lost a second family member to "assisted suicide" ....... nothing short of witnessing a death, much like a execution in a State Prison. Either way, as you stated, the thoughts of those lost remain in your thoughts, each day, every day. The hole left within your heart, never grows back. Never.
Thanks for the words, Carl. I suspect that many of us have had times where our children have had their troubles and, yes, we have to watch over them. Sometimes all you can do is not enough, though. I suspect that I have been more lucky than good in caring for my troubled daughter.
Around 6 months ago lost my pops to it. Not easy at any age 54 was way to young for him to go. Sorry for your loss
Wow, very sorry for everyone that has had to experience the loss of a Family member or friend this way. My Family has had to deal with this twice. Many times there is no way to know ahead of time that someone is thinking of/planning to do this. Hearing of more members of the Military going down this path too.
Yea JJ and everyone it is really more prevalent than most will believe and it is a real sad state of affairs the way our veterans are treated after giving their all.......... It always amaze's me how my friends thought I had some kind of disease that they may catch after this happened to us, you really know just who your real friends are after something like this happens. I just hope that by sharing, maybe, just maybe if we can turn one around it will be all worth it.................."Keep Em Between the Whites guys"
Carl, its likely a lot of your friends didn't come around because they just didn't know what to say to you. I say this because I was that way when I was younger. I could come up with a hundred reasons to avoid a visit, but the real reason was a fear of saying the wrong thing and upsetting the person. I was fortunate that my wife eventually convinced me that the important thing wasn't what I said or didn't say, but rather to let the friend know I'd be there if there was anything I could do for them. Some people never get past that fear, and its unfortunate for them and for the friends they avoid because of that fear. A lot of suicides are related to depression, and men in particular are subject to a lot of societal pressure to "man up" or "deal with it" or "get a grip", and in a lot of cases those pressures are a big factor in avoiding seeking treatment. Its okay for our bodies to get sick, and we don't hesitate to get treatment. But when our minds get sick, we tend to view that as some sort of defect that should be kept hidden if possible. Its a sad situation because so many times the underlying causes are highly treatable and the person ends up with the same desire to live as the rest of us who are so fortunate as to never have had to deal with an illness that's so devastating to its victims and their families.. Thanks for starting this thread, and good thoughts to you for your concern that others may avoid the tragedy you and your family endured. We are not supposed to have to bury our kids.
A good friend of mine lost both of his sons to suicide within two years. Anything anybody can do to help prevent even one more tragedy should never be too much....
Thanks for posting this. Mods, if I've beaten you here, please let this thread stay open. Posted using the Full Custom H.A.M.B. App!
Thanks Carl and so sorry for your loss, have had it happen to family as well as close friends and it really sucks. I am always checking on my kids and friends when something don't seem right, and letting them know there is always an open door to talk or whatever they need, and that there nothing i would not do for them and not to be embarrassed or afraid to ask.
Thanks for posting this reminder again Carl, Somtimes help is just a conversation away, My thoughts are with you and all the others who have lost someone to this, Tim Jones
My heart sinks to hear of your loss Carl. I too lost a son to an accident 18 yrs ago. I know of some of your emotions. All of us who have lost a child share in the guilt of something we could have-should have done to prevent it, regardless of their age. Thanks for the reminder and tip to constantly communicate with our loved ones.
Last September I spent a interesting hour talking with Hamb member Mark Cain about his campaign with Suicide Prevention and the loss of his son. Mark is a man on a mission...take the few minutes to read to listen to the radio interview. This is Marks story and Foundation. HRP http://www.shelbysspeedandkustom.com/foundation/
Carl you have my sincere condolences! I lost my Father over twenty years ago and I still haven't gotten over it to this day! The whole family has a hole in our hearts that just won't heal! If I can do anything to keep from having others go through this pain I surely will! GOD BLESS US ALL!
I have lost friends and shipmates due to Suicide my condolences to anyone who has experienced this. In the military we go through annual training for suicide prevention a lot of our younger sailors complain but I tell them if it helps one sailor then its worth it.
Condolences to all who have lost someone. One thing we can all do is to be less critical of those we mentor, especially kids. Taking out frustrations on those you are trying to teach can leave long-term wounds, he said, also speaking to himself.
Carl , Tim told me about this thread. I have also had a few losses that one call could have prevented. I lost a Father in Law, My Best Girl friend, and 2 good friends. June was the worst when my Daughter thought we didn't need her anymore, I thank all the Angels in Heaven for their ever present eyes .......I still have my Kerry and her 2 girls and grandson and her ever present lifelong friend also have Mom , Grandma, and Love of his life.. To all of those who have lost someone my heart gos out to every one. Mr. Carl thankyou for reminding us to listen a lot better. Remember Eyes and Ears, watch and listen. Thanks again Carl. Oh and today is 9 11 Remember those who were lost that day Beth
We are built to need and be needed. Don't ever think your phone call or kind words are not valued or valuable. Make the call! Posted while on the run with Full Custom H.A.M.B. App!
sorry for your loss ......miss one of my little buddy's going on about 35 yrs now...you don't really hear it coming....
ya never know the differenc an unexpected kind word or action kin make fer someone -- even if it's done unknowingly -- On the Coronado bridge one night -- one night, late, I pulled up behind an older Dodge station wagon stopped by the rail [ he was standin behind the car lookin over the rail ]and inquired of the driver his trouble. He said he was outta gas. I said "well, no worries, I've GOT some for you." He said he didn't have the key to the lockin cap -- well, I'm some worried, cause we jist had a near miss from a driver who wern't payin attention, so, I'm a leetil excited and I twist off the cap w my bare hands! Put in some gas. tell him to try startin it rhoommm -- starts right up! he waves and drives away. well now, as i'm drivin away, I ponder the fact that the Dodge started instantly -- that year model, when it's run otta gas, takes a while fer the fuel pump to git it upta the carb -- likely he were'nt outta gas anyways --
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