you might be a hotrodder if....(humor)

When you are on a cruise down the road and it rains you take the indian blanket off the seat and the role of duct tape off the shift lever (holder). Weave the indian blanket through the roof ribs and duct tape it to the inside of the ceiling so your fuel cell in the back seat does'nt get wet.

 

it was in the living room originally but with all the car parts in there now, i had to make a concession. now if the minibike were assembled, that would be another story

 

Your wifes (and your )roadcar has to live outside because there is a £500 rescue case in the garage taking all the remaining space.

You differentiate between 'proper' cars and modern cars in everyday conversation (In my case the moderns have always been known as roadcars)

 

you were the only guy laughing at the

ford pos line from men in black while in a crowded cinema

 

when the guy from the locall junkyard phones you for advise on old car parts

 

You tell your wife that you really do like watching her 'old' movies on TMC and AMC, but fail to tell her it's to check out all those sweet old cars in mint condition. Those guys dove some great cars, especially Mickey Rooney.

 

You know, KNOW, you have new brake bleeder screws somewhere and find them in the kitchen drawer...you know what movie the song Monkeys In My Hatband is from...you've memorized the script of the Blues Brothers...you just can't bear to sell those polished M/T big block mopar valve covers, just in case you build another one someday...

 

when you run out of rags and you sneak one of your wifes decsent towels out to the garage



if the words "wax on, wax off" brings visions of these

 

When you have to talk yourself out of buying the parts needed to complete your rearend at a swap meet, because you plan on selling said rearend at the next swap meet...rather than buy a dry erase board, you make one out of a spare model a door...when you buy Moon discs for the Bonneville car you designed but have yet to buy the car...

 

Your wife knows that when your head snaps around, it's more likely to be a sharp car than a woman, that caught your eye.

You take great delight in sending the newbie to the parts store for a can of compression.

You know that drawing lines, with a #2 lead pencil, between the posts on the inside of a distributor cap will cause untold hours of enjoyment, while the victim tries to diagnose the problem.

You know that when you adjust for skim, you have to use a soft metal wrench. At least that's what Unk Kohler said, or was it one of the varmits?

 

when the current contents of your pocket are;
-a holley baseplate screw
-a flare tube nut for 3/8" line
-a q-jet secondary lockout lever
-a 1/4" nut driver to go in the socket on the multi tool on your belt
-5 sheet metal screws in two different common sizes
-2 choke housing screws
-64 cents

 

Damn...there's a whole new thread...what's in your pocket that a normal human being would not recognize??
If you need to enter an airport or courthouse, how long does it take you to completely empty your clothing of objects that will set off the metal detector?? Objects that will get immediate response by SWAT team and black helicopters?? How many quart containers would said stuff fill?

 

There's a box with an SBC bellhousing on my desk in my cube here at work... and I work in IT.

 

your stack of magazines would stop the recycling program of paper for a day and you still have them because there might be something you can read again and its totally different because it may apply to a project you never thought you would have. Or you organize your magazines by which project they apply to and how useful they are.

 

You forgot the names of your own children,but know the names of your partsdealer's kids.

 

your mom found a bunch of old carshow T-shirts at the thrift store and now you have a new wardrobe. It happened to me a couple days ago

 

Or.....she made you a quilt out of 'em, for your birthday......

 

Or old cars...

 

If you get a letter from the "neighborhood restrictions watch out guy" that you will be taken to court if you keep firing up them motors and welding after 9:00pm.......

were gonna sell soon..............

 

You've ever woken up early after a snowstorm before the plows come out to slid and do doughnuts in the snow. Thats how i pitched my truck in a ditch. Funnest damn thing iv ever done

If your friends are talkin about drifting, and you start mentionin 3 wheeled brakes, spring shims, and whether offenhauser motors should have had their own class.

If when your friends are talkin bout spending the weekend at the lake, and you ask if its Bonneville or El Mirage

If you collect broken SW gauges, just incase

If your idea of a history book is an old Motors Manual

If youve ever been givin a Best Unfinsished award

If the sound of a split manifold gives you chills.

If you dumpster dive at swapmeets ( thats how i got 5 Model T intakes, fog lamps, and a rochester carb base! )

If youve been trying to sell a motor, but nobody wants it because they dont know what it is ( nash motor )

IF youve ever had to take the head off a motor your selling to prove to people its not frozen

 

When someone else does a burnout, you pause for a moment to smell the burnt rubber.

 

Oh I HATE those assholes! The exact reason I don't live in a HOA, and never will.

 

You mow your lawn and find a car.

You've ever temporarily lost your fingerprints due to wetsanding all day.

Your girlfriend told you that she'd help you work on your car because she knows that thats the only way she'll ever get to spend time with you.

 

Your girlfriend refers to your roadster as "his mistress" when talking to relatives.

You still have nightmares about the cars you cut up to fix other cars "back then".
(I cut up a 69 428SCJ Mach 1 to fix my Boss 302)

The Bldg Inspectors remind you that you never got any of the final inspections or a Cert of Occupancy 5-6 yrs ago, because you were too busy building a rod in your new shop. Then instead of doing the inspection, they spend 45 minutes yakkin' about the muscle cars they had in High School.

 

When you take your wifes stainless steel spatula and cut it up to block off the exaust crossover on the cylinder heads of an engine you are putting together.

Now when I walk into the kitchen with that searching for something look, she get's real nervous.

 

when royal shifters texieria wills thread makes your hair stand on end

 

You mean this commercial here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LuaIJGJNbzo&feature=related

Funny!!

 

If your girlfriend or wife wishes it were another woman you stopped to stare at.

 

You know what year your wife was born because its the same year as your Panhead.
(Sad but true)

 

You have a junk head gasket for a straight 8 Buick hanging on your living room wall as art along with RJ posters, Kent Bash posters, an office desk with a tower built over it to hold in progress model cars, model car parts in plastic cabinet on the desk with drawings, logos and pictures from mags, coffee table covered with mags and catalogs, bookcase with shelves added in to hold a couple hundred Hot Wheels cars, model cars in the shelves of the dining room instead of china, crankshaft standing in the living room floor in the center of a SBC flywheel, front bedroom might as well be the box for a Model A project. Parts catalogs and magazines in five foot tall shelf next to a couch under the "When did you learn the value of a good mechanic?" Snap-on poster.
Pics available if requested.