Yet another mouthy FNG

Well, I’ve been terribly rude and have posted without properly introducing myself. As a form of atonement, I’ll fill you in with (probably) more info than you’d ever hoped/wanted to get from a newbie. After all, this is an online forum and we can pretty much all be whatever and whomever we want to be. Except for here at the HAMB. I’ve lurked for quite a long time and have been very impressed with the lack of pretension and name-dropping that typically appears on other (un-named) forums; this is a truly honest and real rallying place for genuine people. Therefore, here’s the real deal on me:

• I’m 42 and married with 2 young boys.
• I’ve been in professional racing for 20+ years.
• I drove a tunnel-rammed/dual quad/4-speed ‘72 Nova SS to high school.
• I think rib-eye steaks are proof that god loves us and wants us to be happy.
• I’ve been to church about 5 times in my entire life.
• I believe everything great about America can be summed up in one sentence: We invented the nuclear bomb and the top-fuel car.
• I think the true measure of a man is how well he takes care of his family.
• I think that when you play cards with your buddies and win, you never quit until you’ve lost a couple of hands AND have bought the first round of drinks.
• I contribute the maximum allowable to my 401(k).
• I think the death penalty should apply to thieves.
• The same applies for liars.
• Every man should know how to weld.
• I’ve built my own shock absorbers.
• Baseball caps should been worn only one way-the bill facing forward.
• You’ve never seen me on TV.
• Da Vinci would’ve puked at the thought of a “Mona Lisa Paint-Off”.
• I sometimes wish I was Jimmy White.
• “Rat Rod” should be purged from any and all dictionaries.
• The exhaust fumes from my rod make me nauseas.
• I kinda like being nauseas.
• Like it or not, Jesse James really is the shit.
• So was “Sneaky Pete”.
• And “Jungle Jim” too.
• And “Wild Willie” as well.
• Mario Andretti still is.
• People who giggle after everything they say make me want to rip their throats out.
• Anyone who attempts suicide and fails is a coward.
• Hunter S. Thompson was no coward.
• P.J. O’Rourke isn’t either but, hey, it’s been done already.
• Lindbergh didn’t have a “mission control” to let him know if fuel was getting low.
• My rod is a chopped, channeled and fender-less 39 Chev P/U.
• It runs.
• I drive it. On real, live roads.
• I get dirty working on it.
• It has an SBC in it.
• I wish I could afford a 392.
• Or a 354.
• Rust really IS a color.
• So is “primer”.
• This is probably the longest ever newb post yet.

I suppose I should attach a pic of the shit-mixer as well, but it’s late; I’ve got to put the kids to bed and I’m too fucking lazy to go out to the garage and actually take a photo right now - you’ll just have to wait. So there.



Thanks and I’ll be talking to (at) you all very soon,



Rat L. Can

 

Loved your intro. Welcome to the HAMB from an Oklahoma newcomer. CH

 

Welcome!! You sound like you'll fit in just fine.

 

....now that's one of the more creative INTRO's I've seen in 5 years...Hang Around....some of do bite

 

Welcome dude!

 

Hey,it works for me,,,WELCOME to the HAMB!,,,HRP

 

Welcome, great intro. Where are you from?

 

Built your own shocks hey? Well come on in.

 

"I believe everything great about America can be summed up in one sentence: We invented the nuclear bomb and the top-fuel car"

welcome

 

• w
• e
• l
• c
• o
• m
• e

 

Welcome, thanks for the creative intro. Much better than some of the intros as late.
Example; This is a real cool board and I really want too learn, I have a 1999 Zorknit Maggot. I know its not a '32 Ford, but I can't afford a project right now. I'm putting '59 Cadillac tail lights on it, bagging it and painting it metalflake green to make it look more traditional. Thanks for letting me be a member.
THIS IS A TRADITIONAL BOARD! And it sounds like you'll fit right in.
Later, joeycarpunk

 

Sorry. Indianapolis-live close enough to IRP to hear every pass at the US Nat's. Work in Speedway, on Gasoline Alley.

 

I totally deserved that...Not much gets past you guys, does it? And thanks.

 

Welcome to the HAMB! Enjoyed your intro. Lookin' forward to seein' that fenderless Pickup.

 

Haha That rules...I agree. I like this guy.

 

great intro.. this should be the standard for FNG's.

"mona lisa paint-off" aahhh that great!!

now posts some pic's to back up your shit..
Oh, and Welcome..

 

That sir was quite possibly the coolest intro i have yet to witness! welcome aboard.

_T

 

How about somebody tell me what "bagging it" means? I've seen that expression several times here,and I don't have a clue.

 

Hay Awsome Intro but your making the rest of us "FNG" look bad besides it'll take me a week to process all that info.....No just kidding ever in Wis give us a Shout will tip back a few Spotted Cows and grill us one to....Louver dude