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Whats the most Stupid thing a Cop has said to you

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by carlos, May 1, 2012.

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  1. carlos
    Joined: May 2, 2005
    Posts: 1,382

    carlos
    Member
    from ohio

    Well I had this old car with a pair of cherry bombs and scavenger pipes on it and the small town cop lit me up pulled me over asked for my drivers license gave em to him,kinda loud aint it,I said maybe a little,he said Sir dont you think your a little old for this kinda crap standing back lookin at my car,I thought for a second then replied Are you going to give me a tickett or just what the Fu-k are you going to do? I got the ticket and he got pissed:D
     
  2. jcapps
    Joined: Dec 30, 2008
    Posts: 473

    jcapps
    Member
    from SoCal

    Do you know how fast you were going............duh yeah I was doing the driving
     
  3. jd55f100
    Joined: Aug 29, 2007
    Posts: 312

    jd55f100
    Member
    from alabama

    Had a friend pulled over driving a dually on airride and the cop told him he couldnt dive it on the street because it was to wide for the road.......
    he replied that it was the stock width
     
  4. 60galaxieJJ
    Joined: Dec 24, 2009
    Posts: 1,525

    60galaxieJJ
    Member

    "So what's with your plates and tags?" I have YOM plates and tabs from 1960
     

  5. My personal experience is when their lips start moving ..
     
  6. 57Magnum
    Joined: Mar 6, 2012
    Posts: 3

    57Magnum
    Member
    from halifax

    Anything after "license and registration please"
     
  7. hillbilly4008
    Joined: Feb 13, 2009
    Posts: 2,917

    hillbilly4008
    Member
    from Rome NY

    not really a dumb thing, but he got me...

    COP "cars a little loud isn't it."
    ME "its legal, I just bought the exhaust"
    COP "I never said anything about it being legal or not, I just said its a little loud."

    Another time, (the first time I had a roadside sobriety test) the cop asks me if I could say my alphabet backwards. Me ofcourse being a stupid kid, I start attempting to do it. Then he stops me and says "I didn't tell you to say your alphabet backwards, I just asked you if you could." His partner started laughing. Then he told me to walk a straight line, and I told him that I had to tie my shoe first. So I'm standing there on one leg tying my shoe lace perfectly fine, and he still makes me walk in a line... just another cop trying to bust a kids balls. Granted I probably deserved it at the time
     
  8. This just happen to me a couple of weeks ago at an auto auction I attend.

    This cop stops me in the parking lot of this auction and insisted that I was there the previous week. I told him that I wasn't. He said that I was. Well this went back and forth several times and I told him that I wasn't there since December and that he can check that with the auction.

    The cop then said to me.... "Are you calling me a liar"?

    BAM! I waited for this fuckin' moment my whole driving life! I looked at him and said "Yes I am"!
     
  9. I got pulled over in Mississippi and the cop asked "Why ya doin 90 on my highway boy?" I started to laugh, then being active duty military he asked why I had California plates, a Texas Drivers License, and Florida insurance. I guess he didn't see my Military ID that I handed him along with all the other crap he asked for. Still got a ticket, but the man screwed it all up, for the year of the car it said blue, for the color it said 1999, for the model it said Nissan and the make was Altima. Didn't have to pay it because of his mistakes, weather he meant to do it or not, I'm glad. 90 in a 70 in Mississippi isn't cheap.
     
  10. chubbie
    Joined: Jan 14, 2009
    Posts: 2,311

    chubbie
    Member

    cruising thru a small Iowa town one nite with chubbie ('41 chevy fat car) and the red lites came up behind me from a block away. I pulled over on the edge of town by a corn field and waited. same stuff...and then he started to pick on my car!! walked around it with a flash lite asking stupid questions. chubbie was running, and was sounding great!! the cam makes the cut outs shake when it idles. He shone the flash lite on the cut outs said ARE THOSE REAL? Hell yea! WELL, THIER ILLEGAL!! the hell they are!!! i snapped at him.. they have caps on them!!!!! it was getting loud, and his partner, a woman walked up out of the corn field behind me. scarred the shit out of me, and i let out a yell! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU SNEAKING UP ON A GUY LIKE THAT?? SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME!! flash lite cop and sneakey woman got in thier car and left
     
  11. tjmercury
    Joined: Oct 22, 2010
    Posts: 589

    tjmercury
    Member

    How about: "Do you know why I pulled you over?"...................Ummmmmm....No...Why do you ask?
     
  12. what year is your plymouth .....um its a1969 DODGE charger ya know the general lee

    you know you should have run ,our current cruisers couldnt catch you yeah, but your radios can .....he just smiled
     
  13. sheltonk7
    Joined: May 30, 2011
    Posts: 46

    sheltonk7
    Member

    you know they should stay at the police dept. until they are called and quit bothering folks
     
  14. Deuces
    Joined: Nov 3, 2009
    Posts: 19,682

    Deuces
    Member
    from Michigan

    Have a nice day!...:D<him
    :mad:<me.....
     
  15. LWT
    Joined: Jan 3, 2012
    Posts: 188

    LWT
    Member
    from Va.

    Years ago, the first time I got my car together and took it out, I got pulled over by two cops at a gas station in the middle of the local cruise strip. They gave me good cop / bad cop. One walked up & said "you know those tires aren't legal" I said "No sir they're stamped D.O.T. approved right there." He walked off. The other cop walked up. "Wow, how fast have you had this thing?" I said "55 sir :D." He walked off. The first cop walks back up with " I could give you a ticket for those wheelie bars & make it stick but I don't have time to look it up." Really? He gave me his card, told me to call the D.M.V. & call him back. I called the D.M.V., they had me call a Sgt. with the state police. I confirmed that I was legal according to the Sarge & left a message with the cop letting him know I was legal. I was respectful throghout and after that I cruised that strip for years without hassle.
     
  16. Mojo
    Joined: Jul 23, 2002
    Posts: 1,860

    Mojo
    Member

    "what?!"
     
  17. FAST57F100
    Joined: Oct 8, 2011
    Posts: 74

    FAST57F100
    Member
    from Washington

    Well I was getting onto the freeway one evening in my 427 Galaxie. I was doing about 95 in third gear wondering if I should go for fourth when that little voice spoke out... LIFT! So I eased off and out of the trunk came a set of RED & BLUES!! I pulled over and up came a nice looking blond State Highway Patrol person. (Female).

    <O:pShe asks... "Do you always get on the freeway like that?"

    <O:pI replied... "Not always, but probably a lot more than I should."

    <O:pShe smiles and says... "Slow it down, I would hate to see something happen to this nice car!"

    <O:pI don't know if it was the look on my face when I saw that star on her “chest” or my smart as answer but she was cool...

    <O:pOf course not all traffic stops end like that but that is one I will always remember!

    <O:p
     

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  18. Chris 50
    Joined: Feb 1, 2002
    Posts: 443

    Chris 50
    Member

    State cop pulled me over in Wyoming for 78 in a 75 on our way back from B-ville. Really? He had me sit in his cruiser while he ran my info. He asked what was all over the bottom of my truck. I told him it was salt from the B-ville salt flats. I can sense his confusion and he says " you should get that cleaned off". Yeah, thanks for the tip genius.


    Sent from my iPhone using TJJ app
     
  19. 56 Frame Dragger
    Joined: Jan 4, 2011
    Posts: 1,212

    56 Frame Dragger
    Member

    WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO ARREST YOU AND TAKE YOU TO JAIL..........
    Hey, that sounds like fun.......
     
  20. Smokeybear
    Joined: Apr 20, 2011
    Posts: 325

    Smokeybear
    Member

    Not all of us pick on people with cool cars. There's some dumb things said on the other side of the window too. I pulled a guy over in a new BMW once and I didn't even get to speak when he yells "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?" I bend down and say "Why, do you have amnesia?" The look on his face was priceless.
     
  21. retiredblue
    Joined: Mar 1, 2010
    Posts: 272

    retiredblue
    Member
    from california

    you guys are all such rocket scientists you give the job a try, you would shit your pants the first time you had to walk up on a strange car- but it's pretty easy to be smart sitting on your ass in front of a computer-thats it I'm out
     
  22. Had this happen twice: Cop pulls me over and states my safety sticker is expired. Once was in June; sticker dated 07/XX (year). Next was in a 1 ton, which does not even have to have an inspection.

    They're all morons, but they are special morons: they're the ones who got beat up in school, and are only now getting back at all the bullies because they can carry a gun.

    Cosmo
     
  23. Smokeybear
    Joined: Apr 20, 2011
    Posts: 325

    Smokeybear
    Member

    REEEAAALLY? I've been 6'4" 250 lbs since the 9th grade. I've never carried an ass whoopin in my life.
     
  24. Zerk
    Joined: May 26, 2005
    Posts: 1,418

    Zerk
    Member

    The part where they ask "Do you know why I stopped you?" is pure entrapment. I did a lot of things in the past several years, and any one of them is a bigger deal than whatever he's got on his mind.

    If you're like me, just say "No".
     
  25. Hits
    Joined: Oct 31, 2006
    Posts: 3

    Hits
    Member

    "NOBODY peels out in my town." Said while doing his best Barney Fife. Never checked my license (had none), insurance (none), and tag was from my '61 Chevy. I was driving my '29 hiboy roadster and my buddy was in his '31 coupe. He asked us our age- 50's at the time, and said, "isn't it about time you two grew up?" Oh, the good 'ol days in the 90's!
     
  26. HealeyRick
    Joined: May 5, 2009
    Posts: 561

    HealeyRick
    Member
    from Mass.

    I have a good friend we'll call Bob, because that's not his real name. Bob's an ordinary guy who has one extraordinary talent. He's actually been able to make money by diligently tracking down rare sports cars, particularly Austin Healeys, and selling them at a profit. As a result, he's had some pretty interesting cars in his garage over the years. One of the most spectacular was a Ford GT40 that he imported from England. We're not talking about the foo foo Ford GT here, but a real honest-to-God GT40 race car that was built as a continuation car by Safir Engineering and featured a 351 Cleveland topped by a bunch of Webers about 10 inches behind your head. White, with blue over-the-roof stripes, y'know, like this:

    [​IMG]

    Bob decides he's going to drive it to the Lime Rock vintage races. Now this might not be a problem, but did you forget I said "racecar"? Car would run only on race gas and registering the car for the street was impossible because it violated every reg the EPA, DOT and the DMV could think of and some that they didn't even have a chance to come up with yet. Not to be deterred, Bob slapped a dealer's plate on it, but since the car was fiberglass without anyplace to put a magnet on it and no license plate holder, the only place to put the plate was in the rear window. You can imagine how small the window is on a 40" tall car, so basically from the rear it looked like no plate at all on the car.

    We took the "shortcut" to Lime Rock, a winding back road through some of the prettiest scenery in the Berkshires. If some movie producer wanted to cast the part of "Sports Car Road" this one would get the lead. Unfortunately, on race weekends it is the gathering place for every local yokel for miles around who are trying to enrich the coffers of their picturesque southwestern Massachusetts and Northwestern Connecticut villages at the expense of those rich sporty car fellas.

    As Bob was showing me what a GT40 could do on this particular stretch of God's-own sports car playground, which happened to be about four times the legal limit and half the speed that Dan Gurney could have driven it, a helpful soul gave us the universal sign that a speed trap awaited over the top of the next hill. With heroic braking and downshifting, Bob managed to get us under the speed limit before we crested the rise and we motored sedately past the radar officer.

    I knew this wasn't going to go well. Just imagine you're some small town cop seeing a white race car with blue over-the-roof stripes pass by. By the soul of Buford T. Justice, I intuit we're going to be having a conversation on the side of the road in the very near future. So I stare into the fender mirror and ... wait for it ... there they are ... we're lit up.

    The nice officer approaches the driver's window, I slide open the tiny window (no real race car would have roll down windows) and direct him over to the passenger's side to talk to Bob. Wait a minute, Rick. You said Bob was driving, but now you're sitting on the driver's side? What gives? You forgot I said this was a British race car with the steering wheel on the right-hand side where God and the Queen intended it. As soon as the officer gets to Bob's side he notices the four six-packs of beer I have lined up next to me on top of the fuel tank in the side sill. Are any of those open, he asks me. Since it was 9:00 am, luckily none were. (Note to self, when your buddies ask you to bring beer to the track on Sunday because all the liquor stores are closed, bring a car that has a trunk).

    Then Bob and the officer had a nice little chat. Bob was asked for his license and registration. Registration? Are you kidding me? Then there was a lengthy discussion of who we were and why the f... we were driving a car designed for over 200 mph at LeMans on the street. I didn't get all of Bob's explanation, but what I heard of it, it was total B.S. And then, the officer asks for my driver's license. WTF? What did I do? As far as I know, there is no statute in MA or CT entitled "Felony Riding in a Racecar on a Public Way" I was perfectly fine with Bob being led off in cuffs. Hell, it was his car and he was having the joy of driving it where it had no business being. But now this was serious. No way am I going to some one-cell, one-cot hooseqow without a fight. "Excuse me officer," says I, "you're more than welcome to see my license, but can you tell me why?" "BECAUSE YOU'RE DRIVING THE CAR!" he said in a tone that made it perfectly clear that I must have been the stupidest bastid in the stupidest car that ever put one tire into his jurisdiction.

    "Actually, I'm not," I calmly said while I pointed out to this bastion of the law, highly trained in powers of observation, the steering wheel in front of old Bob, whom he had just been conversing with for about twenty minutes. Whoosh! It was as if the Michelin Man had just stepped on a pack of carpet tacks. I don't know if it was embarrassment, exasperation or just a cat being tired of playing with a mouse, but the officer handed Bob back his license, saying, "Maybe you shouldn't be driving this car on the street" and let us go without even a warning. Maybe we shouldn't have, but it was one hell of a good time and one great story.
     
    Last edited: May 1, 2012
  27. I've always wanted to be asked, "Are you drinkin'!?"
    So that I may quickly respond with.. "I don't know officer, you buyin'!?"
     
  28. Chris 50
    Joined: Feb 1, 2002
    Posts: 443

    Chris 50
    Member

    Awesome.


    Sent from my iPhone using TJJ app
     
  29. 19blockhead72
    Joined: Feb 17, 2012
    Posts: 204

    19blockhead72
    Member

    I was in my 68 Plymouth and pulled away from a stop sign just a little to hard and squealed the tires just a bit. A cop stopped me and said he pulled me over because of spinning the tires. I told him that it was a mistake and unintentional. He said "well it sounds like this thing has a lot more then that", and he let me go. I couldn't believe it, what luck!
     
  30. raidmagic
    Joined: Dec 10, 2007
    Posts: 1,438

    raidmagic
    Member

    I got pulled over doing 45 in a 25 at 3am and the cop tld me I was being dangerous. "Don't you kmow kids play on this road?" To whick I asked "at 3 am?" $155 ticket.
     
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