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What's the Most Absurd Claim you've heard at a Car Show, Drag Race, Cruise Night, etc

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by DaveyJonez, Mar 5, 2009.

  1. Fiatdude
    Joined: May 5, 2010
    Posts: 89

    from SoCal

    I want to thank everyone for the past 2 hours of laughing my ass off

    When I had my Fiat, nobody thought it was fast, but I always left a color 8x10 picture of my avatar in the front seat

    And handed out copies of the second one to all the ricers LOL

    Attached Files:

  2. DeadSledTodd
    Joined: Sep 24, 2010
    Posts: 40

    from Ca.

    Nice "MERC".......It`s a Plymouth
  3. bigEkustoms
    Joined: Jan 21, 2009
    Posts: 105


    Some dude was telling me and my grandfather his car went 160 in the quarter mile, and with out missing a beat, gramps said"you must have been looking at the temp gauge'.
  4. Mac_55
    Joined: Mar 10, 2008
    Posts: 686


    bwahahahha ... Nice!!!!!!!!
  5. huntrod
    Joined: Feb 24, 2008
    Posts: 17


    Oh yeh, when i was younger i would cruize fron town to town looking for trouble,or so the town boys thought. I pulled into a gas station that i had been to many times before, and some dude pumping gas said. I have seen you running around town and let me tell you! YOU AINT SHIT!!! WOW i said, what makes you say that? He told me that, he had a buddy with a 1969 camaro that would kick my ass so bad that i would never come to this town again!! So i said is it a drag car or street car? What size motor? What color is it a were can i see it. Then he said really loud (THAT CAMARO IS SO F@#$&N BAD HE CAN'T EVEN GET IT OUT OF THE DRIVEWAY) OK !!!
  6. i knew a guy in school who screwed his tires to the rims on a stock 69 f150 because it would spin the tires on the rims (so he said)
  7. rodman41
    Joined: Dec 10, 2010
    Posts: 41

    from colorado

    my son is also a tuner guy, sorry guys i did my best but he know his shit he got this civic, one screamin little car runs in the 9.25s 15000.$ in motor alone sounds like a pissed off bumble bee in a coke can. let me drive it once said dad shift it at 9500
  8. rodman41
    Joined: Dec 10, 2010
    Posts: 41

    from colorado

    worked with a guy we called starvin marvin weighed 300 plus at 5'6" said he wrestled bears as a kid no one ever belived him always gave him shit for lyin ,brought in pictures one day shut us up.
  9. Fatbob309
    Joined: Jan 1, 2009
    Posts: 491


    How did he get one of those? I was told that all the EV1 were lease only and when the lease ran out GM took them back and crushed them or killed the eng. smells a little like b.s.
  10. gladeparkflyer
    Joined: Jun 16, 2009
    Posts: 396


    a very "spinal tap" moment...
  11. Zack Methvin
    Joined: Jan 1, 2010
    Posts: 253

    Zack Methvin

    "MY 55 Chevy with a 396 on street tires and stock suspension will pull the front wheels off the ground high enough to clear a coke bottle". LOL
  12. Damn it, now I have to clean my computer screen...
  13. I cringe when I read some of these stories. Its gotten so bad that I would just park my car at a show and just walk away from it. I've had so many people tell me my car was a Torino and that Ford didn't make fastback Galaxies and that I didn't know what kind of car I was driving. The best ever was, "Nice Impala".

    Attached Files:

  14. Wasn't there a movie "Redline 7000" about NASCAR?
  15. nofin
    Joined: Jan 7, 2010
    Posts: 321

    from australia

    Not quite the same, but I saw an ad on ebay last night for a "400 small block chev, stroked to 388"
  16. Zack Methvin
    Joined: Jan 1, 2010
    Posts: 253

    Zack Methvin

    First off let me say, THANK YOU for what you do for me, my family and my country!!! Regardless of cars, ships or planes. Your service allows me and family to sleep safe at night and that is the #1 priority to me. God Bless you!

    I agree 100% with you about Americans buying non American made cars. I have seen more Vet's than i care to mention driving Toymotors and such. I am amazed by this. We are sending Trillions of dollars every year to foreign countries when we should be building a BETTER American car right here on our own soil! It is mind blowing to me. There has never been a foreign car made that i would take over a Chevelle, Cuda or Stang, NEVER!

    Laine, Be Safe and take care over there. Thanks again!
  17. little skeet
    Joined: Jan 27, 2008
    Posts: 300

    little skeet
    from huston

    At a drag race... in 1962
    "Ha, ha, look they are going to run that 6 cylinder (really a straight eight Buick) against that blown Willys coupe."

    Right before we out ran him.

    We had the last laugh on that one!!

    " Wasn't anybody there except me and Little Skeet"
  18. "A 351 WINDSOR??!! You need a Cleveland".

    Heard that one all the time (since I have a 351 Windsor in my '51) but I put a pair of aluminum COBRA valve covers on it, now it's " Shit man that SOB got a COBRA engine in it, bet that sucker will haul ass!" :eek:
  19. fbama73
    Joined: Jul 12, 2008
    Posts: 990


    A guy pulled up to cruise night in a white Lamborghini Countach. It drew a crowd pretty quickly, and he was telling everyone how fast it was, blah, blah blah.

    I said "It's a kit car."

    He got very defensive, pointed to the Lambo badge on the nose and proceeded to tell me that "You don't know anything- they can't put these badges on kit cars!"

    I pointed to the interior and said "I guess I don't know anything- I never knew that Lamborghini put steering wheels in their cars that say 'Fiero' on them."
  20. Hey, I've done that Maaaaaan:cool:
  21. eaglebeak
    Joined: Sep 17, 2007
    Posts: 1,101


    My El Camino is 74" wide. Outside to outside. He probably was talking about the space between the tires, not the tubs.
    Still wouldn't work though. 33+33=66. 74-66=8 inches between tires.
    It is possible.....
  22. Amish
    Joined: Aug 6, 2009
    Posts: 20

    from Tacoma

    I've heard alot of these and I usually just shake my head. The one thing I've heard numerous times from guys at shows is that they "built the car from the ground up" when they actually just bought it from someone else. It's funny too as nothing had been changed on the car since the previous owner sold it. Usually I wait for them to stop bragging to the passers by before I call them on it (as nice as possible). Then they back peddle and try to say " well I had to totally re-do this and that". Just makes me laugh.
  23. Shit, I don't need to take my 56 to shows. I just go to the 7-11 down the street & have my own show.

    I hear things like " my dad had one what is it?" or a 75 year old man says "I have one in my yard heaped in a pile someday I'm going to fix it up"

    My wife has a 57 Nash Metropolitan. When she takes it out there is always some little old lady who tells the story of the whole high school football team who cramed themselves in just to see how many could fit.:cool:
  24. Pharouh
    Joined: Sep 18, 2008
    Posts: 440


    Great thread! I remember hearing a lot of those stories in high school.
    One of my favorites was that they heard there was a (Corvette,57 Belair convert,40 Ford,etc) you could buy for $50. It was almost mint,but this guy died in it and they didn't find him for 2 weeks!
  25. I go to a car show. If I stay long enough someone will come up to me & say "I like your Chevy truck."
  26. How about ..............".I don't buy my cars I build them"...........From a guy that can't weld but has a welder, for his buddy to use, can't build an engine but has a buddy that can, can't do body, paint or interior work but has buddys he pays. The only fabrication this guy can do is the story about his car !!!
  27. Thats a good one.
    How about this one....A guy buys a know the builder....& the guy who bought the car tells you he built it in his garage.
    I hear that alot during Hot August Nights:cool:
  28. cederholm
    Joined: May 6, 2006
    Posts: 1,619


    Not at a car show but...

    About my O/T MG.

    Dillweed - "hey, sweet Jag"
    me - "Thanks, but it's not a Jag, it's an MG"
    Dillweed - "Bullshit, GM never made a car like that, it's a Jag,"
    me - "hey, wanna by my Jag??:D"
    Dillweed ...walking away
  29. toolman1967
    Joined: Mar 13, 2008
    Posts: 441


    My daughters ex-fiance (thank God he is EX) said that he had a turbo Eclipse that would do 185mph. He went from Central Illinois to Columbus Ohio in 2 hours when his grandfather was sick." Yeah", he says "it was so fast that it scared me so I went to the local dealer and had them take all the performance stuff off so I could drive it normally". The whole family just sat there and listened to all his claims and finally my brother who is a serious gear-head said "Charlie......just stop, you're embarrassing yourself". He stopped in dead sentence and just sat there for the rest of the night staring at his feet. I am so glad she finally dumped him, he had a story for everything, bigger, badder, longer and harder than everyone else. IDIOT!
  30. GravityFeed
    Joined: Feb 2, 2009
    Posts: 31


    "The third carburetor doesn't kick-in until 135 mph." Next-door neighbor said this countless times about the tri-power GTOs... not even sure if he ever owned one - didn't want to ask.

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