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What's the Most Absurd Claim you've heard at a Car Show, Drag Race, Cruise Night, etc

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by DaveyJonez, Mar 5, 2009.

  1. The 340 was likely a 273 or 318. If it was indeed a 340, no wonder he didn't want to swap out the carb, that was the extremely rare 'one of none ever made' 340 2 barrel engines!
  2. Scott(MO)
    Joined: Oct 27, 2009
    Posts: 3


    I had a 69 camaro with a mild 283 I put in it when I was a teen. A kid from another school had a Mopar Dart that looked really neat. He asked me if I wanted to race and if my little 283 could keep up. I asked him what he had under the hood. He said he had a built 383 Hemi. At that point I knew I had nothing to worry about. I said "sure I'll race." Suddenly he come up with some excuse not to. His oddball Hemi was in fact a slant 6. (haha)

  3. terryr
    Joined: Feb 8, 2007
    Posts: 287

    from earth

    Even better BS!

    It was quite a quick car though. Must have had good gears.
  4. 1954pontiac
    Joined: Nov 24, 2009
    Posts: 12

    from o'neill ne

    Got into an argument once at a show with a spectator, we were showing our 70 Ram air iv judge we just finished, this car was never ordered with a hood tach, so none was put on. He first tells me that the sticker was wrong on the hood scoops, "thats supposed to be III not IV. then he procedded to tell me that we didnt have a real judge just a gto. "every judge has 4 speed, hood tach, no a/c and factory traction bars. This is what this dipshit said to me. We restore 69 and 70 judges for a living.
    Joined: Aug 22, 2009
    Posts: 2,601


    Ok, Michael Jackson didnt stop by my house to use the bathroom.................But his sister did.
  6. I think that same dumbass has been at several shows I've been to lately.:):):)
  7. OldCrow
    Joined: Jan 10, 2010
    Posts: 134


    It's fun to go to shows just to listen to the "experts" from a distance as they pass my car.

    [spectator to me] "didn't those catch on fire" (ya. this is the last survivor)

    [spectator to his buddy] "wow. nice GT40. is that a big block chevy in there" (Fiero with a Northstar)

    [spectator to his buddie] "that's a Shay. Ford reproduced those back in the 70s" (steel 31 model A rumble seat coupe)

  8. Scarebird
    Joined: Sep 26, 2006
    Posts: 849

    Alliance Vendor
    from ABQ, USA

    Best (worst?) I heard was from some tweaker; she told me my GSD was bred from wolves and will alpha female the house.

    Attached Files:

  9. The older we get the faster we were.. Deal with it... :p
  10. t-rod
    Joined: Feb 7, 2009
    Posts: 423


    Thanks for the great tech tip! I've got the day off work and have some photon generators laying around so I'm going out to the garage to get to work.
  11. seatex
    Joined: Oct 24, 2006
    Posts: 2,661


  12. onlychevrolets
    Joined: Jan 23, 2006
    Posts: 2,307


    This is some funny stuff
  13. traffic61
    Joined: Jun 15, 2009
    Posts: 1,435

    from Owasso, OK

    What's the word on the "new" Speedway photon generators? Are they good or typical Ferengi crap?
  14. LIL.TIMMYUser Name
    Joined: Jan 30, 2009
    Posts: 741

    LIL.TIMMYUser Name

    I've heard that the quality control isn't great. some have been measured with a RQMS variation of up to 12%!!!!! not what you want if you're after top performance. damn chinese repop junk!
  15. 33-Chevy
    Joined: Nov 30, 2007
    Posts: 267


    I hate that last one about the Corvette myself. I have heard it many times and the people telling always admire the A-Hole that rips off the mother of the dead soldier. Usually it starts off "There was an ad in the paper for a 1953 Chevrolet asking if it was worth $250.00 "or whatever the price of the day was.
    I am a KWVA member.
  16. LunaticFord
    Joined: Mar 13, 2005
    Posts: 11


    Okay, this isn't a claim from someone, but it was still absurd and maddening. I was working on my 57 Ford in my driveway, and a guy pulls up in a crappy looking pickup.

    Pickup guy: Is that yours?

    Me: Yep.

    Pickup guy: Are you fixing it up?

    Me: Yep.

    Pickup guy: Those things will nickel and dime you to death.

    Me: That's alright, I have a lot of nickels and dimes.

    Pickup guy: That's a lot of work.

    Me: I have a lot of time.

    Pickup guy: Why don't you sell it to me?

    Me: Oh...this thing will nickel and dime you to death.

    He drove away.
  17. Me: Oh...this thing will nickel and dime you to death.

    Man, that's great. I'll store that one away for future use! :D:D:D
  18. dirtbag63
    Joined: Nov 26, 2006
    Posts: 26


    At the 2010 Sac Autorama while looking at Jerry Anolik's Moon Rocket, I over heard two couples, probably in their mid 50's, ask why did he bring a dirty car to the show and couldnt believe he fixed his car up "that way" on purpose!!!!! Some people!?! STUPID SHOULD HURT!!!!!!
  19. GassersGarage
    Joined: Jul 1, 2007
    Posts: 4,735


    IT RUNS 9's..........
  20. You mean all cars don't RUN 9's???
  21. fleetbob50
    Joined: May 1, 2006
    Posts: 306

    from Waco,Texas

    It's only 1 of 3 known to exist ........
  22. Bill Walford
    Joined: Nov 9, 2008
    Posts: 68

    Bill Walford
    from fl.

    I went over to this guys house,and his truck was for sale. I inquired about the truck and he said it ran and was a great truck.....o.k.
    Well,it would not even start.....and was all full of TAR in the inner fenders and he says.....the yblock is a good engine.
    THE QUOTE I REMEMBER IS.....If you buy this truck from will have years and years of my knowledge anytime you need it. I almost laughed at him.
    What a pompous ASS.
  23. Ford-Man
    Joined: Apr 6, 2009
    Posts: 288


    I can't remember if I posted this once before or not, so here it goes.

    About 3 years ago I was looking for flathead stuff. I called a few local bone yards trying to stir up some info, and one guy said, "we don't carry that sh*t anymore, but one guy has a few that I might be interested in." I call this guy and he says he has some stuff that would work, and I should come out. I show up at this guys house and to say he had some sweet vintage iron would be an understatement. I was amazed. We went to this junk yard that has been around for eons and he directs me back to his personal stash. I have to clear the brush out from a bus that we crawled in and what I saw was the promise land for an early hot rodder. Nailheads, flats, BBC, actual Boss 302's, a few early Hemi's to name a few more common engines that I could pick out along with a few I learned more about when I got home. His flats were frozen solid and showing some harsh wear, and it would take an act of God to get it out so I passed. However, for the next 4 hours, the yard owner and him told me stories of the good ol days with him and his bug eyed sprite powered by a 426 with 6 deuces. As set back as I was, I sat back and listened and enjoyed the company of some old hot rodders swapping mile long tales, half listening, half shaking my head. I figured everything was mostly BS until we got back to his house. He has a "trophy" room that I declined invitation to. He walked in anyways, came back out with a stack of tattered magazines, and said something like, "I bet you think I'm full of sh*t don't ya? I would too, so I'll let ya read the rest." He tosses me a mag with a picture of his Austin Healey with a huge ass Hemi stickin WAY out of the hood right on the cover with him standing next to it looking much younger than he does now. He said he don't lie, he isn't here to impress, and he don't much care if I believe a word he says, but he thought I would enjoy seeing some of his old stuff. He told me to come back if I was interested in anything, wanted to BS, or had any questions. I need to get back over there.

    I have also heard WAY to many Chevy stories. It is amazing that EVERY SBC is a Vette, and they ALL have a pink dot, ALL will pull the wheels, ALL are sleepers, and yet none show up when I put my pink slip on the line. One guy cracks me up on a weekly basis with his 327 powered Camaro that dies because he has the idle set so low, it runs so rich his wife/girlfriend/prostitute is in tears from the fumes, and he swears it would dust my Lightning. I am still waiting for him to show up as I drive my Lightning every day to work.

    I could post crap for days on here...I get to hear it every day at work!
  24. Mudslinger
    Joined: Aug 3, 2005
    Posts: 1,964


    72 Torino for sale. Runs good, I havent drove it in 2 years. The exhaust manifold leaks, the intake leaks, the battery is dead.
    Can I put a battery in it and hear it run?
    It wont start.
  25. nali
    Joined: Sep 15, 2009
    Posts: 828


    I m french and live in Canada .
    My daily is an AMC / Rambler Ambassador 1966 ...
    - Strange car , did you send it from France ?
    The car was built in Ontario , Canada , just above US , just before end of earth , cause earth is flat and Bill Gates invented Internet in 1936 .
  26. A Rodder
    Joined: Jul 13, 2008
    Posts: 2,477

    A Rodder

  27. Mac_55
    Joined: Mar 10, 2008
    Posts: 686


    kinda related .

    I always enjoy reading ads for stock red and white 55 chevys on boyd wheels, and s-10's with a 350 , or a chevelle with a big block and always seeing the words " one of a kind " in the ad
  28. Just last weekend, I had some idiot kid tell me him and his dad are building a '57 Dodge Charger with an 800 cubic inch Hemi in it. Sure would like to see that bad ride!
  29. croxxedmember
    Joined: Apr 16, 2010
    Posts: 159


    so true and funny. them lot give real macanics a bad name
  30. gimpyshotrods
    Joined: May 20, 2009
    Posts: 16,422


    Yeah, on an 1/8-mile track.:D

    I recently had the second owner of a particular car tell me all about how he built it. The story was dead-on. He had all of the information correct, except for one piece. He did not have a good or clear answer as to what my logo was doing there, welded to the cross member.
    safetythird likes this.

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