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Projects Those goddamned "30 minute jobs" that aren't

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by NAES, Jun 5, 2019.

  1. NAES
    Joined: Dec 24, 2008
    Posts: 434


    I'll be the first to admit that I grossly underestimate the time it'll take to get pretty much anything in life finished. Most of that comes from trying to get as much as possible done with the free time I have available. Funny that the list I make for myself rarely gets completed in the timeframe I have.

    My latest one is replacing the fuel pump on my '53 Chrysler. I have a 360 stuffed in there and thought I had enough room to loosen it up and pop it out.

    Nope. Alternator had to come off and I had to loosen a motor mount and jack up one side of the engine to clear the upper control arm. Aaaannnndddd the soft fuel line was questionable so it got replaced as well. Its back together now and I'm tidying up a few loose ends now.

    Anyone guilty of living in the same fantasy world as me?

    NAES View attachment 4306336 20190605_105247.jpeg

    Sent from my SM-N910V using The H.A.M.B. mobile app
  2. Jalopy Joker
    Joined: Sep 3, 2006
    Posts: 23,035

    Jalopy Joker

    when non car builder comments that it must take a long time to build one of these old cars - I reply that nothin' takes more than 15 minutes - mind you, that it may be thousands of 15 minute increments
    bobss396, cktasto, '51 Norm and 3 others like this.
  3. 2935ford
    Joined: Jan 6, 2006
    Posts: 3,114


    Don't know what you're talking about.....never happens to me! :)
    mgtstumpy and Spoggie like this.
  4. Sky Six
    Joined: Mar 15, 2018
    Posts: 1,164

    Sky Six
    from Arizona

    This is exactly why I don't keep any records of my labor hours.
    I love it when the wife says: " I thought you finished that yesterday.".
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  5. wicarnut
    Joined: Oct 29, 2009
    Posts: 3,154


    You are not alone. I have Never have done a 5 minute job in 5 minutes my entire life. I have learned watching TV that you can do a complete build in 4/5 30 minute shows, man those guys are good. Now that I'm old, 5 minute projects can take 5 hours to 5 days. It seems in every DIY project some unforeseen problem arises, One of my favorite expressions of late is " Why does everything turn into a F storey "
  6. KJSR
    Joined: Mar 7, 2008
    Posts: 2,130

    from Utah
    1. Utah HAMBers

    I tell my kids "hey give me a will only take 5 minutes"........they know nothing takes 5 minutes anymore.
    LBCD, waxhead, Spoggie and 1 other person like this.
    Joined: Sep 5, 2007
    Posts: 1,387


    I can usually get it running by the third time I do it.
  8. BamaMav
    Joined: Jun 19, 2011
    Posts: 3,228

    from Berry, AL

    If it takes 5 minutes, it'll take me 5 hours to get the shit outta the way so I can get to the thing I want change that takes only 5 minutes to change!

    I hate stuff I can clearly see, but there's no way to get to them without taking half the vehicle apart!
    Last edited: Jun 5, 2019
    wicarnut and TrailerTrashToo like this.
  9. lake_harley
    Joined: Jun 4, 2017
    Posts: 612


    When my fabrication business was at full boil, people would often ask to sneak in a job that will be "really quick". I saw a sign in a business once, and wished I had one like it that said something like, "So want me to quit working on the rush job I was rushing on, to work on your rush job?"

    wicarnut, VANDENPLAS and catdad49 like this.
  10. catdad49
    Joined: Sep 25, 2005
    Posts: 3,502


    If I charged myself labor...............I couldn't afford Me!
  11. catdad49
    Joined: Sep 25, 2005
    Posts: 3,502


    Also, I get really suspicious when that 5 min. job actually takes 5 mins.! Trust me That doesn't happen often.
  12. AVater
    Joined: Dec 9, 2008
    Posts: 2,006

    1. Connecticut HAMB'ers

    Biggest lie ever told: "Installs in minutes"
    My time estimation skills are very lacking
    catdad49 likes this.
  13. When I get a "It will only take you 5 minutes" job request, my standard answer is "All 5 minute jobs take at least 2 hours- I'll have the one I'm doing now finished in about 5 minutes - so come back in a couple of hours"
    NAES, INVISIBLEKID, mgtstumpy and 2 others like this.
    Joined: Dec 14, 2009
    Posts: 1,840


    Every.damn.time. I do something for my car YES !!

    Quick tune up? Cap screws seized!
    Replace wheel cylinders .... bolts seized , drums stuck on, lines fubar
    Check timing .... where’s that damn timing light !
    See why radio don’t work WTF is this wiring mess !!!!

    I think it’s part these old relics we work on, and part the standard of the job we want. Most if not all of us want a quality job on our cars.

    Also a “bolt on” is never truly a bolt on.
    And a quick carb adjust turns into fixing a vacuum line, cleaning up wiring better, polish or paint the air cleaner or valve covers etc.

    I went and installed a inline Fuel filter and tank shit offon my 53 Chrysler that turned into 3 days of scraping and sanding the floors and detailing the underside ?!?!
    Wtf I just wanted a fuel filter installed ! Lol!
  15. manyolcars
    Joined: Mar 30, 2001
    Posts: 7,789


    What happened to NO PROFANITIES IN THE TITLE???
  16. LAROKE
    Joined: Sep 5, 2007
    Posts: 1,387


    Every five minute job is one broken bolt away from becoming an all day ordeal
  17. Chappy444
    Joined: Jan 27, 2012
    Posts: 804

    1. Maryland HAMBers

    I just go by whatever "the book" says it will take....LOL

    My biggest problem is "mission creep"
    Once I get through all the trials and tribulations of getting something apart and the new part ready to install that little voice in my head starts talking "man, it took so much work to get in here, maybe you should just go ahead and fix/replace X while you're here so you don't have to go through this aggravation again down the road" This usually leads to more disassembly, cursing, and waiting for a $3 part.
    And, is it just me or do parts come apart better and jobs go smoother after you bleed on them a little bit?
  18. oj
    Joined: Jul 27, 2008
    Posts: 6,106


    My buddy Albers has coined the term for it: Project Entanglement Syndrome (PES) where the simpler the project looks the longer it'll take.
    RidgeRunner and catdad49 like this.
  19. jetnow1
    Joined: Jan 30, 2008
    Posts: 1,299

    from CT
    1. A-D Truckers

    It is not just cars-When the better half gives me a honey do list the five minute jobs are never 5 min. Of course if I stopped procrastinating they would get done faster. In my defense after working on other peoples homes all week working on our home is not that appealing.
    catdad49 likes this.
  20. bschwoeble
    Joined: Oct 20, 2008
    Posts: 393


    I grit my teeth when my buddy says " I figure this should only take an hour to do ". To me, he's already jinxed himself.
  21. turdmagnet
    Joined: May 19, 2008
    Posts: 358


    I've given up saying a time estimate when the better half asks how long it will take to get something done. Now I respond with the number of beers I expect it to take!!!!

    Sent from my iPad using The H.A.M.B. mobile app
    pila38, catdad49 and arkiehotrods like this.
  22. Pats55
    Joined: Apr 29, 2013
    Posts: 200

    from NJ

    My five-minute jobs, usually causes me to lose my will to live
  23. wicarnut
    Joined: Oct 29, 2009
    Posts: 3,154


    When I had my Tool & Die/Pattern Shop 36 years it was always a huge balancing act to try to keep everyone happy. All customers feel they are the most important one you will ever have and the Sun will not come up tomorrow if they can't get it done NOW ! Funny thing, the Sun has/will always come up, I did not cause a failure once, LOL. Then there's the employee problem, Tool & Die Makers/Pattern Makers are highly skilled intelligent men that are the biggest PIA, tears when cut back to 40 hours, anything over 45/48 way to much They have many important personal things that need attention, my favorite memory, just can't work this Saturday, my wife is having a rummage sale. that was his last day at my shop. My solution was with the customers was, he who pays promptly gets first priority, after some years actually developed a good group of customers, somewhat reasonable and willing to pay for the "Rush Job" I never found the solution with the help, went to management classes, experimented but after time I gave up and I just fired them when they pissed me off for the last time, over 36 years 30/40 employees over the years and maybe 2 or 3, I'd ever work with again. But I'd still do it again, the positives still out weighed the negatives for me.
    catdad49, Algoma56 and lake_harley like this.
  24. catdad49
    Joined: Sep 25, 2005
    Posts: 3,502


    Now, honey-dos are whole different ball game! Her ques., "How long?" My ans. , As Long as it Takes!"
    OLSKOOL57 and VANDENPLAS like this.
  25. X-cpe
    Joined: Mar 9, 2018
    Posts: 645


    Right up there with "bolt on" and "universal fit"

    I was born slow and exploit it to the max.

    My students are always wanting to do something to their cars that will only take "half an hour", they just have no clue how many "half hours" it will take.
    catdad49 likes this.
  26. mgtstumpy
    Joined: Jul 20, 2006
    Posts: 7,537


    I just finished one of those jobs today, weeks later. I updated the old electricals and installed a new coil for peace of mind while I was at it. Engine had power at distributor and fuel so it cranked over but wouldn't start. Mmm, time to walk away and problem solve. Swapped in the old coil today and it started so it's now time to return the new coil for refund.
    catdad49 likes this.
  27. arkiehotrods
    Joined: Mar 9, 2006
    Posts: 5,351


    Murphy must visit you guys too! He sure hangs around here every time I start a quick and easy task!
    catdad49, VANDENPLAS and mgtstumpy like this.
  28. '51 Norm
    Joined: Dec 6, 2010
    Posts: 652

    '51 Norm
    from colorado

    Nothing delays a project more than "well as long as we are here".
    It's not a real project until you bleed on it.
    X-cpe, catdad49, arkiehotrods and 3 others like this.
    Joined: Dec 14, 2009
    Posts: 1,840


    I call it the “ might as wells”
    Might as well fix the wiring if I’m doing the coil
    Might as well fab a bracket for it as well
    Might as well replace the hard ware
    Might as well detail the engine bay
    Might as well clean the front cross member
    Might as well run new brake and cooler lines
    Might as well fix these oil leaks
    Might as well swap exhaust and intake manifolds
    Might as well rebuild the tranny
    Might as well replace the diff gears
    Might as well clean up the trunk
    Might as well fix this chrome trim
    Nights as well clean up the body work
    Might as well replace the carpet
    Might as well redo the seats
    Might as well repaint the car........

    3 years later......MAN THAT TUNE UP TOOK A LONG TIME !!!
  30. 34Larry
    Joined: Apr 25, 2011
    Posts: 805


    Man ain't it the truth, ditto everything posted. EVERYTHING, (not just cars) takes more and more time as one get older also.

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