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Hot Rods Quotes to live by...

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by Boneyard51, Apr 2, 2018.

  1. Boneyard51
    Joined: Dec 10, 2017
    Posts: 4,364

    Boneyard51
    Member

    I was a witness to an auto accident one time, when the cop asked about it..... I said” they hit about the same time! “




    Bones
     
  2. verde742
    Joined: Aug 11, 2010
    Posts: 5,407

    verde742
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Over heard at the Volunteer Fire Department, " Well , we DID save the ground"

    I told my nabor who is contemplating divorce: "You can be Happy with ALL of her, OR with Half your stuff ."

    I find the longer the marriage, the shorter the kiss....

    If your nose runs, and yer feet smell, your built upside down,

    Never question yer wife's judgement SHE chose you...

    He don't know nuthin' about nuthin'
     
    Last edited: Aug 10, 2020
    wraymen, Boneyard51 and chryslerfan55 like this.
  3. quick85
    Joined: Feb 23, 2014
    Posts: 2,136

    quick85
    Member

    "Every day's a holiday, every meal a banquet."
     
    wraymen, Boneyard51 and chryslerfan55 like this.
  4. ...better to have something you don't need, than to need something you don't have.
     
    sevenhills1952 and Boneyard51 like this.
  5. Rickybop
    Joined: May 23, 2008
    Posts: 6,621

    Rickybop
    Member
    from Michigan

    Good stuff, guys.

    Something I heard a long time ago that struck a chord and I sometimes utilize.
    If you don't know what to do...
    Do SOMETHING.



    Sent from my VS835 using The H.A.M.B. mobile app
     
    Thor1, Boneyard51 and chryslerfan55 like this.
  6. pirate
    Joined: Jun 29, 2006
    Posts: 525

    pirate
    Member
    from Alabama

    It’s better to want something you can’t have then to have something you wanted but can’t get rid of.
     
    Last edited: Sep 9, 2019
    Boneyard51 likes this.
  7. Rickybop
    Joined: May 23, 2008
    Posts: 6,621

    Rickybop
    Member
    from Michigan

    My dad used to have sayings. I didn't seriously consider some of their meanings until later in life.
    Such as...
    Boy, you're gonna look funny walking sideways the rest of your life.
    Maybe I should have considered sooner.

    Sent from my VS835 using The H.A.M.B. mobile app
     
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  8. jaxx
    Joined: Mar 22, 2008
    Posts: 385

    jaxx
    Member

    the best way to avoid a hangover is to stay drunk
     
    chryslerfan55 and Boneyard51 like this.
  9. 56sedandelivery
    Joined: Nov 21, 2006
    Posts: 6,377

    56sedandelivery
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    "I'm more man than you'll ever be, more woman than you'll ever get". Most people don't really "get" what's said, but, it's a single cut down with two actual cut downs. I've been saying that since high school (66-69) when I was being bullied by the jocks (aka jerks), and then some years ago, it turned up in a popular movie; they stole my line! When it was said in the movie, I quickly pointed it out to my wife, who actually missed it. It's even one of my signatures here on the HAMB. I am Butch/56sedandelivery.
     
  10. Nicholas Coe
    Joined: Jul 5, 2017
    Posts: 1,662

    Nicholas Coe
    ALLIANCE MEMBER
    from Tontitown

    My grandfather liked to tell me:. "Boy, You got a lotta quit in you!". Wait. Or was it Ron White?

    Sent from my Pixel 3a XL using The H.A.M.B. mobile app
     
  11. Tri-power37
    Joined: Feb 10, 2019
    Posts: 510

    Tri-power37
    Member

    My dad always said “ two can live as cheap as one - but only for half as long “ or along the same line “ couples don’t argue about money - they argue about a LACK of money”. He also liked the classic “ never argue with a moron”.
     
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  12. Women are like used cars, in both cases, you have to find one with imperfections you can put up with!

    Amateurs get exited when things go right, professionals get exited when things go wrong!

    If cocks were quills, she'd be a porcupine!

    Take the "7" home, she'll be more grateful and they all look the same in the dark!

    Life is to short to dance with fat women!

    If you find yourself in a hole, stop diggin'!
     
    chryslerfan55, Boneyard51 and coneman like this.
  13. s55mercury66
    Joined: Jul 6, 2009
    Posts: 3,980

    s55mercury66
    Member
    from SW Wyoming

    For roughnecks, here are the three oilfield "can'ts"
    "If you can't get it, you can't stay, and you can't straddle a ditch with a wheelbarrow".
    It's called roughnecking, and not easynecking, for a reason.
     
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  14. RJP
    Joined: Oct 5, 2005
    Posts: 1,657

    RJP
    Member
    from PNW

    my buddy's comment when I finished my 3rd T bucket. "Much as you fuck up, you were bound to get it right sooner or later."
     
  15. Nicholas Coe
    Joined: Jul 5, 2017
    Posts: 1,662

    Nicholas Coe
    ALLIANCE MEMBER
    from Tontitown

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  16. verde742
    Joined: Aug 11, 2010
    Posts: 5,407

    verde742
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    what I once longed for, was disappointing, and I didn't keep it long.

    If your shooting darts, aim higher than the middle, same in life.

    So many cars, So little time..

    anticipation, is sometimes BETTER than participation...

    Hey ! Beauty is only skin deep, Then I skin her..
     
    Last edited: Aug 10, 2020
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  17. Casey Riley
    Joined: Jun 27, 2018
    Posts: 465

    Casey Riley
    Member
    from Minnesota

    "You don't have to be the best, just need to be better than the next guy"
     
  18. BrerHair
    Joined: Jan 30, 2007
    Posts: 4,493

    BrerHair
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Think I need a drink after seeing these posts, and sure enough, ran right into some classic advice:

    Man I love the HAMB!
     
  19. foolthrottle
    Joined: Oct 14, 2005
    Posts: 1,047

    foolthrottle
    Member

    I changed the Forrest Gump line "life is like a box of chocolates" to " life is like a load of horseshit, you know yer gonna get it, you just don't know how much."
     
    Last edited: Sep 21, 2019
    Boneyard51 and chryslerfan55 like this.
  20. jimmy six
    Joined: Mar 21, 2006
    Posts: 7,167

    jimmy six
    Member

    And don't call me Surely
     
    Ned Ludd, das858, j-jock and 2 others like this.
  21. 49ratfink
    Joined: Feb 8, 2004
    Posts: 17,855

    49ratfink
    Member
    from California

    if it don't chrome go it...
     
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  22. sevenhills1952
    Joined: Mar 14, 2018
    Posts: 940

    sevenhills1952

    Grandad next door growing up always said the craziest things. Like when he potty trained me he said "Push the button, pull the chain...out comes a little brown choo-choo train".

    Sent from my SM-S320VL using Tapatalk
     
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  23. Lost in the Fifties
    Joined: Feb 25, 2010
    Posts: 414

    Lost in the Fifties
    Member

    As my old granddaddy used to say, "A man is only as good as his word."
     
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  24. I was at work n overheard a fellow talking about giving his son advice. I realized then and there I had never done that with my two sons who were fully grown.
    Feeling remiss in my duties as a Father, I called them together and clearly explained the reason behind this discussion.
    I advised them "Never fry bacon when you are naked".

    1 more car I promise, Rex Winter
    Dry n windy Lubbock Texas
     
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  25. THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN GENIUS AND STUPIDITY IS THAT GENIUS HAS ITS LIMITS
     
  26. Don't attempt to delay someone that has to go boom boom in the potty.
    Bob
     
  27. If you got up in the morning and went to bed at night and didn't learn anything all day....why did you get up ?
     
    Boneyard51 likes this.
  28. Always marry an ugly girl, she'll never ever leave you but if she does you won't mind.
     
    themoose and Boneyard51 like this.
  29. Don't let the door hit you where the good Lord spilt you.
     
    chryslerfan55 and Boneyard51 like this.

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