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Hot Rods Quotes to live by...

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by Boneyard51, Apr 2, 2018.

  1. My Grandpa

    Every place that you go, there will be an asshole,
    If you can't spot the asshole then you need to leave because you're it.

    When it comes to Garages, start off with the biggest you can because they always get smaller
    When it comes to women, start off small because they always get bigger.

    My dad,
    It's not usually hard to know the right thing to do
    Actually doing it may be the hardest in life

    If it's worth doing, then someone else will do it.
    If you're going to do it then do it the best that you can.

    My lawyer
    If it weren't for the last minute nothing would ever get done

    Every deal ever made is impossible without at least a small moment of fraud, some deals require much much more to complete.

    You can't get blood out of a turnip,
    But for $300 I can make a turnip shit it's pants.

    Some business mentors

    Better to catch nickels than put your money out and chase dollars.

    Always make payroll even if you go without, those people are your most valuable resource.

    Never lower your price, let someone else loose money on the job
    The lowest bidder might have missed something
  2. Slopok
    Joined: Jan 30, 2012
    Posts: 2,614


    If birds are so dumb, then how come they always know when you've just waxed your car?
    Shutter Speed, j-jock and Boneyard51 like this.
  3. Speaking of freight trains, my Drag Racing buddy used to say “I passed him like a Freight train passes a Hobo.”

    Sent from my iPad using H.A.M.B.
    chryslerfan55 likes this.
  4. tiredford
    Joined: Apr 6, 2009
    Posts: 509

    from Mo.

    Pussy is a powerful thing...…..Boyd Crowder
  5. All I can tell you, is don't piss off a crow. I have a neighbour that used to harass the crows, and they returned the favour in spades. They crapped all over his cars, and every time he was outside, they would dive bomb him. He was the enemy.
  6. I don't remember where I picked up the line, but it was from some comic back in the 50s.
    I used to hate it when I would ask for specific instructions to a place, ( meaning that I was lost and feeling a little less than happy about it), and the person would reply, "Oh, it is about 20 miles as the crow flies". My response would automatically be, " Well how about if the goddam crow has to walk?"
    57Custom300, treb11 and Boneyard51 like this.
  7. One response I still use frequently today, is when people ask me how I am doing, and I am feeling like 5 pounds of sun dried owl droppings, and I know they really don't want to know. I know they are just making polite conversation.
    I respond that "I am the best in my price range." This almost always makes them laugh, and still allows me to be honest with myself about how I am really feeling so I can take care of myself.
  8. dan griffin
    Joined: Dec 25, 2009
    Posts: 475

    dan griffin

    2 quarts of the cheapest heaviest you have.
    Boneyard51 likes this.
  9. jetnow1
    Joined: Jan 30, 2008
    Posts: 1,728

    from CT
    1. A-D Truckers

    When I worked for a newspaper they used to say Never let the facts ruin a good story. Think about that as you watch the news.
  10. j3harleys
    Joined: May 12, 2010
    Posts: 885


    When someone asks me how I'm doing I always reply with It's to early to tell, no matter what time of day it is.
    clem and Boneyard51 like this.
  11. X-cpe
    Joined: Mar 9, 2018
    Posts: 1,076


    When I was a third grader, the sixth grade wisdom of Chucky, "What ya doin' Chucky?" " I don't know, but I'm not going to let it stop me." Took that to heart when I started on my coupster.
    Boneyard51, dana barlow and j3harleys like this.
  12. I write this on the whiteboard for my students:
    1) Knowledge is power
    2) Ignorance is bliss
    Pick one.
    My dad used to caution me: "Avoid the very appearance of evil." That, after I got caught doing something stupid I shouldn't have done.
    Also: "Tough times don't last; tough people do."
    And finally: Faith, belief and superstition are one rail; logic, science and facts are another. No matter how far down the tracks you look and think they eventually come together, they won't and can't. It's an illusion.
    Boneyard51 and X-cpe like this.
  13. treb11
    Joined: Jan 21, 2006
    Posts: 3,654


    Boneyard51 likes this.
  14. jnaki
    Joined: Jan 1, 2015
    Posts: 5,388



    One of the most recent quotes pointed out to me (by someone I know…) was:

    “Don’t Let The Old Man In…” The days of “on the go” activity for the last 70 years has taken its toll. Rough, sand lot, tackle football, cut and fake basketball moves, real varsity HS football, 2 on 2 basketball, years of running in college, surfing, hiking, desert motorcycle racing, and the killer of all: Rugby. Knee injuries, after knee injuries, makes quite an effect on the old bones. But, at the time, it was …"it will heal." And, heal it did in a few short weeks.

    But, the older one gets, the tired old bones have worn away and we have all become shorter than we once were. It just takes longer to heal and get back. It is a sad part of life that as we enjoy all activity when we were young. It does take its toll on the bone structure and grinds away at being old. So, when we old active people hobble across the room and wonder what the h#$% is making all of the commotion, it is our body talking back… “Thanks for the journey, now it is my turn.”

    Toby Keith

    “Don't let the old man in, I wanna leave this alone
    Can't leave it up to him, he's knocking on my door
    And I knew all of my life, that someday it would end
    Get up and go outside, don't let the old man in”


    At age 88, acting, playing golf, and making movies? Who is this Clint Eastwood guy?
    Rowdy who?
  15. Chappy444
    Joined: Jan 27, 2012
    Posts: 1,215

    1. Maryland HAMBers

    Being Successfull is like being pregnant;
    Everyone says congratulations but no one ever asks how many times you got f^<#ed
  16. Shutter Speed
    Joined: Feb 2, 2017
    Posts: 873

    Shutter Speed

    Ya can't make puddin' outa poop...

    but I'll keep tryin'.
    Boneyard51 and j3harleys like this.
    Joined: Jan 24, 2010
    Posts: 1,973

    from IDAHO

    From My Hero... gfgf.jpg
    Boneyard51 and chryslerfan55 like this.
  18. j3harleys
    Joined: May 12, 2010
    Posts: 885


    Boneyard51 likes this.
  19. Chappy444
    Joined: Jan 27, 2012
    Posts: 1,215

    1. Maryland HAMBers

    my favorite line of that song is:

    "Ask yourself how old you'd be
    If you didn't know the day you were born"

    Boneyard51 and chryslerfan55 like this.
  20. ramblin dan
    Joined: Apr 16, 2018
    Posts: 2,362

    ramblin dan

    Die with memories instead of dreams...
  21. eaglebeak
    Joined: Sep 17, 2007
    Posts: 1,156


    "Harder than hobo shit"
    We called her "Butter Face", she had a nice body but her face would stop a clock.
    Boneyard51 and Shutter Speed like this.
  22. Smokeybear
    Joined: Apr 20, 2011
    Posts: 325


    A buddy of mine asked me how I was one day that I had been sick with the flu, I answered "I feel like I've been eat by a wolf and shit over a cliff" He laughed so hard, beer came out his nose. Then I laughed and felt better. :D
  23. J. A. Miller
    Joined: Dec 30, 2010
    Posts: 1,514

    J. A. Miller
    from Central NY

    "How ya doing?"
    "I feel like I was shot at and missed, shit at and hit."
  24. I am sorry that I am going to have to steal the two above responses. I need to increase the variety of responses and these are perfect.
    Another one I have used for years, is that I feel just like a classic car, an Oldsmobile with 2,000,000 miles, with loose power steering, burned valves, and a leaky exhaust.
    Boneyard51 and chryslerfan55 like this.
  25. jnaki
    Joined: Jan 1, 2015
    Posts: 5,388



    In talking with family members that are always anxious, one slogan rings true: “Don't worry about tomorrow. It will take care of itself. You have enough to worry about today.” Then we all laugh at each other, from the silliness of the worries for today. Ha! “What Me Worry?” Not at this time in our lives… we are happy, satisfied with our place in society, and not like the anxious relative, we are settled in for the last quarter of activities.


    When driving our old hot rods as daily drivers, we always had that feeling when sticking that key in the ignition. Will it start? Will it run well going down the coast for a 100 miles? It will take care of itself, with your help…

  26. mbailey99gt
    Joined: Dec 31, 2017
    Posts: 17


    When I first got my driver's license, my Dad told me...'Nothing GOOD ever happens after midnight'.
    His way of re-enforcing my 11:30 PM curfew.

    There is a lot of wisdom in that phrase...IMO

    Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk
  27. clem
    Joined: Dec 20, 2006
    Posts: 3,176


    Good advice,
    Straight out of the bible, Matt 6:34
    kbgreen, Ned Ludd, Boneyard51 and 3 others like this.
  28. (Therefore)
    That’s an important word
    It Means “because of all this”

    Because you’ve heard what I just said
    Because you’ll do what I’ve just told you
    Because you see what I’ve just done
    “Because of all this”

  29. MrMike
    Joined: May 21, 2010
    Posts: 138


    When I started as a mechanic decades ago , one of the older mechanics told me " don't screw up your daily driver you need to be at work every day, and when some asks me how it's going ? my usual reply is " so far so good, but the day is early!"
  30. drtrcrV-8
    Joined: Jan 6, 2013
    Posts: 1,399


    "If it's got TITS or TIRES, eventually it's gonna give you TROUBLE!!"...a popular swap meet T-shirt from the '80s

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