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Hot Rods Procrastination and priorities

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by borderboy1971, Oct 25, 2019.

  1. borderboy1971
    Joined: Oct 20, 2008
    Posts: 688

    from Canada

    Sorry, I gotta vent. Last night I was at a gathering for a friend. He's leaving tomorrow as part of the radical build off for sema. His build is not my style of stuff, but to each there own. Anyways, I'm visiting with people at the party and a guy gives me the gears because I'm still working on my garage, and says how he finished his quickly. etc.etc. My response was that I'm also trying to finish a house renovation at the same time. Hindsight is 20-20, but I should have told him that I have a wife and 2 daughters that above EVERYTHING else they are my priority. He's a bachelor with no kids. My number one job is to spend some time and look after my wife and girls and everything else has to wait, no exceptions. Do I procrastinate....yes I do that too. But nobody knows my life, as I don't know anybody else's, so I'm not gonna judge why someone doesn't have their latest hot rod built. Rant over.
  2. williebill
    Joined: Mar 1, 2004
    Posts: 2,561


    Was telling this story just today. HAD a friend who spent every weekend either in his garage, or a show, or a swap meet, and hardly evert saw his 2 kids on the weekend, even when they were young. He never understood why I went to my son's ball games, and my daughter's dance stuff, instead of doing car stuff with him. I tried to tell him, but he didn't get it. I took care of my mom a lot after my dad died, all while raising my kids, and trying to run my business. The same ex-friend didn't understand why I didn't just park my mom in a nursing home, and get my car stuff done.
    I've got a car I started in the late 80s. It's really a radical project, and I want it done in my lifetime. BUT.. There were whole years I didn't even touch it, because of my family.
    It's just a fucking car...
    Do your thing, don't worry about assholes. They're everywhere.
    Don't keep in touch with my ex friend anymore, last saw him at his father-in-laws funeral years ago. Wonder how his kids turned out.
  3. There is always someone that likes to promote themselves, a single guy doesn't have a family to provide for ,to house and feed, priority's come first, and the luxury of spending money on a project doesn't come close.

    I am not one to blow up but you missed a opportunity to tell the guy where to go and how to get there, he is not worth your trouble and he's a bachelor probably because no woman would put up with him.

    Family comes first, the cars are a fun hobby and I enjoy them very much, but those cars have sat when I need to be with my wife , kids & grandchildren. HRP
  4. 41rodderz
    Joined: Sep 27, 2010
    Posts: 4,722

    from Oregon

    Yes sir. Family is always first.
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  5. squirrel
    Joined: Sep 23, 2004
    Posts: 46,134


    Yup, family is first. Get the kids out in the garage to help you, get your wife to work on the house remodel, take them all to shows/races/car adventures.

    There are lots of ways to play this game. I like to get more out of it, so I put more into it.
  6. Chavezk21
    Joined: Jan 3, 2013
    Posts: 612


    Family is first. My project in my avatar came home in 2014. Worked on it for about a year, then stopped that and spent 4 years building my moms 58 impala, done that with help from my brother, nephew and niece. The 58 was my pop's car. Him and my mom went all over in it. The didnt have a new car until he retired. My mom now gets to enjoy driving it as well as my brother, and when I go visit I do to. The best thing about doing that car is I got to go hang out with my mom, brother and his kids, as well as get the car going. Mine will get done eventually, but I made lots of memories with family that I would not have.
    Sandgroper, The37Kid, morac41 and 5 others like this.
  7. Boneyard51
    Joined: Dec 10, 2017
    Posts: 4,019


    I spent my younger years with my son , baseball, racing motocross, then we built his first truck. Then did the grandkids, ball games, band, etc. We now do yearly camp outs and what seems like a birthday party every month! Spent a ton of time with my Dad before he passed. Still spend time with my Mom and Sister. Butttttt,,,,,, if you look in the dictionary under will see my mugshot! I am the best there is at this.... since I retired! Everyday is a Saturday now!

    INVISIBLEKID, morac41 and williebill like this.
  8. KevKo
    Joined: Jun 25, 2009
    Posts: 414

    from Motown

    Missed opportunity? Maybe. But do you think telling him off would change his mind? Not likely. So best to just let it go. You have your things in the right order.
  9. Bandit Billy
    Joined: Sep 16, 2014
    Posts: 6,549

    Bandit Billy

    @Chavezk21 , I used to live in Brush Prairie, now I live in Battle Ground. Funny thing is I didn't move, the city limits did!
    My wife and kids take priority over the car crap, so does my job and occasionally my golf game. I wouldn't have it any other way.
  10. GordonC
    Joined: Mar 6, 2006
    Posts: 1,987


    Williebill assholes aren't everywhere, they are strategically placed so we run into them! Family first, always.
  11. borderboy1971
    Joined: Oct 20, 2008
    Posts: 688

    from Canada

    I should add that I'm guilty of helping my friends and neighbors (when they ask me) sometimes too much which doesn't help me getting my own projects done. I know they'd help me too if/when I need it. It's too hard to say no to them, so it's easier to just help.
  12. Kids spell love T I M E

    Procrastination will make you miserable. Give it up for something more productive as soon as possible. You’ll be happier.
  13. Perfect,,, you paid it forward and now you can ask for some help without feeling bothersome. 2 or 3 guys working together can get way more done than 3 one man teams.
  14. woodsnwater
    Joined: Apr 4, 2016
    Posts: 373

    from North Al.

    Truth hurts don't it. Or else you wouldn't care what the dude said. Quit procrastinating.
    Peter Nowak and stillrunners like this.
  15. WB69
    Joined: Dec 7, 2008
    Posts: 1,227


    "Kids spell love T I M E". Awesome, never heard it put this way. But, so true!!
    31Vicky with a hemi likes this.
  16. Petejoe
    Joined: Nov 27, 2002
    Posts: 10,469

    from Zoar, Ohio

    I think your priorities are right on.
    Do exactly what YOU feel the need to do.
    I didn’t start playing with these toys until my kids were out of college.
    That was my priority. And sending three of them to college back to back really tested us financially. But we got it done.
    Family first. Good for you.
    Don’t let your friends take advantage of your good heart. Friendship goes both ways.
  17. 6sally6
    Joined: Feb 16, 2014
    Posts: 1,110


    Ron White sez it best......"you just can't fix stupid"! Put 'stuff' a head of people/family is just plain stupid!
    We see it (IF we look) but they don't.
    Too bad.
  18. pirate
    Joined: Jun 29, 2006
    Posts: 463

    from Alabama

    To each his own! At the end of the day you have to be happy with your decisions and not apologize for doing what you think is right. The amount of time you spend with your wife and children is not as important as the quality of the time. Sitting in the same room is not the same as being engaged, talking, working on a project or doing things your wife and kids will remember long after the event. The real proof of being a good parent is how much time your kids and grandkids want to spend with you after they become adults and parents themself.
  19. 19Fordy
    Joined: May 17, 2003
    Posts: 6,815


    Don't fret over the remarks of an immature idiot.
  20. I’m just now trying to get going on my old car thing after a few years off taking care of family issues. I’m glad I was able to do what I did, but I’m having a hard time getting going in the shop. It seems that I just don’t care as much as I once did.
    Last edited: Oct 25, 2019
    guthriesmith likes this.
  21. jimmy six
    Joined: Mar 21, 2006
    Posts: 6,390

    jimmy six

    Family first even thou you will sacrifice for it. We ran Bonneville from the mid 70's until 2012 off and on as time and $$ permitted. The wife was my pit crew. Son took over when he was 12 and started driving at 16. I coached Soccer, Softball and Baseball. Also worked with the cub scouts. Something must have stuck because our son became a scout master and his son an Eagle which neither of us did.
    Now his mother and I are on his dirt car pit crew. and he is still helping me at El Mirage like he did last week end. Our daughter's youngest is in Karate and they live in Florida. I would not want to mess with her.
    I spent too much time out of town working because we needed it to make ends meet. My wife did not work...I wanted her home when they came home just like our parents...We've been married 53 years..I know one hell of a lot of unhappy single guys.
  22. OLSKOOL57
    Joined: Feb 14, 2019
    Posts: 450


    Started my 57’ Chevy about a year ago. 72yrs.old. Hoping to finally finish one, working on it when I can. Health concerns like everyone here. Just working on it is fun for me.
    Am with my wife, kids and grandkids as much as I can.
  23. Damn had to go after the single guys....the non-sperm donors - like they don't have family ?
  24. oldiron 440
    Joined: Dec 12, 2018
    Posts: 1,507

    oldiron 440

    We all do what we can, life is big and it gets in the way. We are not selfish SOBs we get what we can when we can and work when we can. It's a hobby not a job. There's my rant for the day........
  25. Beanscoot
    Joined: May 14, 2008
    Posts: 1,409


    My answer to a coworker who had similar snarky comparisons to me was to look at him, and say "I'm not competing with you".
    scotty t likes this.
  26. morac41
    Joined: Jul 23, 2011
    Posts: 532


    Family first .. grandkids.. great-grandkids
  27. BamaMav
    Joined: Jun 19, 2011
    Posts: 4,168

    from Berry, AL

    That's one of the reasons my car is still sitting, money goes to the family first, toys come later. Trucking all these 33 years I missed a lot with my kids, but I made sure they didn't go without. We had a few years as empty nesters, and we enjoyed them, never thought we'd end up raising a grandchild, but life is a funny thing, you play the hand dealt you. I'm still missing a lot with him, but at least he gets to see me almost everyday, something my kids didn't get to.

    We went to two shows this year, where we usually do 6-8 and 6-7 cruise ins. We can't take him with us due to his behavioral problems, so instead of leaving him at a babysitter every weekend, we stayed home or did other things. Hoping he grows out of a lot of it, but time will tell. He comes first, the cars can sit....
  28. Donuts & Peelouts
    Joined: Dec 12, 2016
    Posts: 1,191

    Donuts & Peelouts
    from , CA

    Family first. OP you are a good man. But listening to a batchelor about anything is like taking money advice from a McDonald's cashier. I make it a point to be home everyday before 7pm to spend time with my one year old.
    The only thing worse than a single guy is a guy with a family who acts single.
    INVISIBLEKID and scotty t like this.
  29. TWKundrat
    Joined: Apr 6, 2010
    Posts: 146


    I'm single and I still don't get any of my projects done...
  30. lake_harley
    Joined: Jun 4, 2017
    Posts: 947


    The words in your thread title say it all if you look at them correctly. If you're working on the right priorities you're not procrastinating!

    Procrastination is more like when I take a nap after lunch rather than getting going on what I like to think are my priorities. :oops:


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