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Hot Rods On My Butt!

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by Blown35, Jul 30, 2017.

  1. dirty old man
    Joined: Feb 2, 2008
    Posts: 8,410

    dirty old man

    To Mac the Yankee, the "pass you and turn off" and the "pull out in front of you and drag ass" stuff you relate is not confined to GA, it's universal, and your calling it a GA thing is a symptom of why the Winder natives that know you refer to you as "that Yankee asshole";)
    I drag race my roadster once in awhile so I put a Hurst Line Loc on it to hold it in the lights, discovered it works great as a hill holder for starting off up inclines. As for the guy with the pickup, leaving a nice, shiny 12" hitch extension with a big shiny ball in your Reese hitch will do wonders for keeping folks off your ass:) Just don't forget it's there when you walk around behind your trucko_O:eek::mad:
    mr57, kidcampbell71 and Engine man like this.
  2. This past Saturday morning I was getting to work early, rolling east toward the Little Rock airport and not driving hard. An SUV had cleared the green light at some point behind me and started closing fast, and go close enough I could see the top of the windshield, not the bottom.
    I have a little third brake light in the back glass of my A Tudor. I put in the effort to tap my brake pedal with my left foot and not slow down either.
    No change of intent from the other driver.
    I clutched it out of 5th, into 2nd at 40 mph, jammed on the throttle, and swung into the center turn lane. I should've cleared the problem individual behind the wheel of the other car.
    The very smart individual driving the other car passed me on my right.
    Like I said, going to work. A young ummm, male, happened to need to stop and buy a part and noticed my car. He asked another customer who owned the car and if he could offer an apology for what his girlfriend had done.
    I accepted from him, and told him that she is going to get herself and others hurt while using lack of respect of other drivers. He took that with respect and shook my hand like he meant it and understoood.
    I hate working in the big city.
    Bruce Fischer likes this.
  3. Like Fred said,that can get you shot.
  4. junkman8888
    Joined: Jan 28, 2009
    Posts: 426


    Greetings! Have to add one story to the pile. A local police officer who rides a bike to work in the warmer months wears his pistol belt around the outside of his suit jacket. Nobody tailgates him and nobody cuts him off.
    Bruce Fischer, raven, clunker and 2 others like this.
  5. roundvalley
    Joined: Apr 10, 2005
    Posts: 1,772


    I have noticed over the years, if you have a plaque or a year of manufacture plate, people will get close to read them.
    F&J, Bruce Fischer and LBCD like this.
  6. Engine man
    Joined: Jan 30, 2011
    Posts: 3,476

    Engine man
    from Wisconsin

    Perhaps the new vehicles with collision avoidance systems or self driving vehicles will put an end to this.
  7. A Boner
    Joined: Dec 25, 2004
    Posts: 5,349

    A Boner

    A friend is so pissed at tailgaters that he is thinking about putting a windshield washer set up on the back of his hot rod aiming at their windshield. He says he is going to fill the bottle with 50/50 antifreeze so their wipers will just smear it, not clear it.

    I just start to gradully slow down and look for a safe spot to pull over and let them pass. If I can't find a safe spot to move over, I slow down to a speed that matches the saftey interval they are leaving behind my vehicle. When I stop at a traffic light, I stop about a car length behind the car in front of me. If a car stops too close behind me I very slowly creep ahead. Some drivers then get it and some (most) don't and squeeze back up to my ass.

    They say at a stop light that you are supposed to stop far enough back so you can see the rear tires on the car in front of you. Spread the word to every dumb fuck you know.
    Bruce Fischer and Kustom.Falcon like this.
  8. The Shift Wizard
    Joined: Jan 10, 2017
    Posts: 1,769

    The Shift Wizard

    Did I ever tell you about the time my teenage daughter just got her license and I was teaching her how to drive stick? Naturally, I wanted to find an incline at a stop sigh on a quiet street for practice. So sure enough, 10 seconds after stopping at the sign, a bugger eating, mouth breather pulls up 18 inches behind us. So new learner driver, stressed and frustrated, brake lights on and off, rolling back a couple inches at a time. The goober ain't budging even though the road is clear around and behind. He waits it out until our vehicle eventually rolls gently into his front bumper. Then he wants to claim damages to his POS 10 year old car. (Remember those 70's massive car bumpers; the black ones with the fake chrome plastic strips that crack and turn yellow after a few years? Yea.... that "damage". I started giving him an ear full but he left before I was quite finished.

    Done close to the vest in a way that can't be seen from the rear looks innocent enough.

    I'm on the interstate, one fine day, and I'm following an older 50's Ford but at a nice interval so there was no antagonism. All of a sudden the Ford spews this huge fog bank of oil smoke and I'm sure I slowed but at 70mph, I'm in it in a couple of seconds. I can't see squat and I'm trying to determine what to do. Is he stopping or slowing in front of me? Is some yahoo coming up fast behind me? I choose to continue at maybe 50mph and things clear up after maybe 50 yards..... totally clear and the Ford is an eighth mile ahead not blowing a drop of smoke!?! In the thick of it, I thought maybe he dropped a valve guide or lost a piston ring. WTH! But then I wondered if he had some sort of James Bond rig to inject oil into the exhaust flow.

    I wouldn't encourage anyone to pull something which is obviously illegal..... but I will say it obviously works when things are too close for comfort.
    Bruce Fischer likes this.
  9. The Shift Wizard
    Joined: Jan 10, 2017
    Posts: 1,769

    The Shift Wizard

    Another one I've heard about, but not seen, is to aim the windshield washers (OT vehicles) to miss your windshield, over the top of your car and onto the tailgater's windshield.
    EDIT!!! I see this was posted moments before I did. So never mind,
    Bruce Fischer and Ragmanray like this.

  10. I love that Ford, the Caddy mill, the dual quad and the Lasalle trans. (I like your blown Ford too). I was digging through your posts to get more images of the Cad motor, couldn't find any. Are those Rochesters or Carters? Either way, well done.

    Oh man, drivers have gotten way worse up here in New England over the past 10 years, just like Seb Fontana said. Everyone is tailgating to get the people in front of them to move faster, cutting people off, no concern for anyone/anything that's not them. Right up your butt at a red light too, horn going the millisecond the light turns green. City, burbs or in the country, male, female, old, young, doesn't matter.

    A few years ago I lost a bet with my wife, and had to get a vasectomy (long story), Dr. Stitched me up funny, I could barely walk. A couple days later, a guy was beeping at us from behind, wanted my wife to drive through a red light (red arrow=no right turn on red), she wouldn't do it, he kept laying on his horn. My brain snapped, (something was going wrong with my testosterone level, I think), I reached over and shut the car off, pulled the keys out, stepped out of the passenger door, hobbling around, dangling the keys at the car behind us screaming "now NO ONE is going anywhere, mother- f@&$%^*!!!!!" I let them sit there for three light cycles. A car full of junkie/townie dudes came out, It almost went to blows, good thing it didn't because I could barely walk as it was, and there was no way in hell I was going back to that Dr to stitch up my nuts again if they ripped open and dumped out everywhere. No way, no how.

    Moral of this story; maybe just use condoms.

    Sent from my iPhone using The H.A.M.B. mobile app
  11. @clunker; salt peter maybe.
    I love my DD O/T car, but it attracts douchebags like a magnet. I used to get so angry at the nonsense they would pull. I used to, because I decided that they were just stressing me out and I was letting them. Now I just question their sexual proclivities when they try to goad me into action, and I drive on at my own pace I'm feeling that day.
    It took a while to get to this state of self-consciousness. Ohhhmmmmmmmm.
  12. Yes, I'm with you! I was temporarily insane. Better now. za-zen dictates: "if something is bothering you, do it more"....

    Sent from my iPhone using The H.A.M.B. mobile app
    Bruce Fischer likes this.
  13. Fortunateson
    Joined: Apr 30, 2012
    Posts: 2,817


    With my OT standard tranny when stopping on a hill I roll a little bit backwards when I see someone coming up behind me. They tend to stop at a more reasonable distance then. I had a a-hole stop so close to me at a red light that I pretended the car stalled. When the
    Ight turned green I put the emergency flashers on and just as the light yellow off I went while the other guy had to wait at the red.
  14. NashRodMan
    Joined: Jul 8, 2004
    Posts: 1,577


    LOL Clunker!!!
    I had that done and the worse part of it is....the SECOND needle.....cuz you knew it was coming!!!!

    Back to car subjects. hahaha
    clunker likes this.
  15. Thank goodness your coupe didn't end up looking like Randy's. HRP

    Bruce Fischer likes this.
  16. gimpyshotrods
    Joined: May 20, 2009
    Posts: 16,593


    I grew up there, and can confirm this to be the truth.
  17. I like the line loc idea. I try to avoid big hills with traffic with the Ford. I'll even pull over to the curb if the light is against me and wait for the green and no line of cars behind me. On small inclines when waiting for a light, I just pull up and let it roll back a little, rinse-repeat. The person behind me usually gets the idea and backs off.
    Bruce Fischer likes this.
  18. belair
    Joined: Jul 10, 2006
    Posts: 8,241


    On the old HAMB, a thread with this title would have gotten an entirely different kind of posts.
  19. I think that's what they make these for! :D

    Bruce Fischer likes this.
  20. partssaloon
    Joined: Jan 28, 2009
    Posts: 384


    On my way to the LARS 6:30 in the morning, using the HOV lane, speed limit 65, I'm running 70, on my ass, bump it to 75, on my ass, bump it to 80, on my ass, bump it to 85, they go around. I'll stay in my desert nowhere!
    Bruce Fischer likes this.
  21. topher5150
    Joined: Feb 10, 2017
    Posts: 1,733


  22. Deuced Up!
    Joined: Feb 8, 2008
    Posts: 3,592

    Deuced Up!

    On our way to the Meltdown Drags a few weeks ago I had the Austin on an open trailer and we were on a two lane highway in Missouri just out side Jefferson City. I had a guy run up on me so fast I thought it was a cop, I was just waiting for the lights to come on....but they didn't. Ironically I was following right behind a State Trooper. We are running right at or maybe a few over the speed limit following him. We get to one of those slower traffic keep right lanes but we are not slower traffic at all so I don't pull over nor does the Trooper. The guy flashes his lights at me but I keep hauling ass up the hill. Then he pulls to the slower lane and floors it. He goes ripping by me and flips me the bird. He is basically so busy making sure I see his middle finger that he is door to door with the Trooper before he even realizes what it is. He slams on his brakes, which had to be a huge obvious statement to the Trooper who proceeds to pull into the slow lane and slows down as well. Dad and I just truck right on by. LOL
  23. bryanyeskie
    Joined: Jun 13, 2016
    Posts: 157

    from Hixton

    Strategically timed flame thrower. Or a granade thrower attachment. Should solve the tailgater problem.
  24. silent rick
    Joined: Nov 7, 2002
    Posts: 3,955

    silent rick

    just kill the engine. it will make them and everybody behind them back up to be able to pull around you and then laugh at them as they drive by.
  25. Gman0046
    Joined: Jul 24, 2005
    Posts: 5,848


    I read that truckers sometimes throw out old spark plugs to discourage folks who are messing with them. Besides who can ever say where an old spark plug might have came from?

    Bruce Fischer likes this.
  26. Advantage of fender less car! Sooner or later I am going to kick up a stone in their face.:oops:
    Bruce Fischer likes this.
  27. Fortunateson
    Joined: Apr 30, 2012
    Posts: 2,817


    We're those guys names Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper?
  28. Blown35
    Joined: May 20, 2008
    Posts: 209


    IMG_1169.JPG IMG_1162.JPG
  29. leon bee
    Joined: Mar 15, 2017
    Posts: 413

    leon bee
    from Arkansas!

    I quit ever tryin to teach any of em a lesson. Even if you affected one driver, well there's 900 million more of them. That, and I always remember half of them are crazy and got a nine or a .40 on the seat beside them.

    I spit tobacco juice out the window for those tailgaters, makes me feel better.
    Bruce Fischer likes this.
  30. blowby
    Joined: Dec 27, 2012
    Posts: 6,293

    from Nicasio Ca

    Put your reverse lights on a toggle switch.
    Bruce Fischer likes this.

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