Once sent a girl over to the gas station , told her that her car sounded like shit and she needed a can of compression. I figured she would get laughed out of the place. The dumbass clerk spent 15 minutes trying to help her find it . Ill never forget what he said " we got the grocery truck in today , i know i ordered some"
Wow , the more i think about this the onryer i remember being. Took a guys plug wires on his 5.0 stang and swapped a few of em around one night at a party. Cops busted the party , he was stupid drunk and always bragged about outrunning the law on those old country roads, He couldnt get her above 30 that night and got busted for underage dui and acid that evening. A kid drove his moms deluxe conversion van to school one day, were talking curtains , tv EVERYTHING!!!!!! it was one of the summers that the Locusts or " cicadias" were EVERYWHERE . We started filling 5 gallon buckets with them and dumping them in his van. When he opened the door there had to be 2 million of them damn things in everywhere ,
Not really a prank, but something I find funny, I was putting a new distributor cap in my truck and accidentally put the wires in a backwards order. I fired it up and my buddy literally shit his pants. To this day he wont help me with engine work (he thinks I did it on purpose)
Just swap the coil wire with a plug wire in the cap - 1 cylinder fires when they crank it but it ain't gonna start. Often used to result in a dead battery. Prussian blue is the hot ticket on door handles, etc. Anti sieze is a distant second. Oh yeah, the gob of grease on the phone earpiece - I heard a lot of calls answered with "what the f@#%"
back in the early 70's on my dad's last day of high school he and his friends arrived at school bright and early, they hid in the bushes in the car park, after the headmaster arrived in his VW beetle and left for his office they banded together and picked up the front of the car dragging it forward 3 feet and hooking the front bumper over a small metal pole. when the headmaster hopped in his car to leave for the day he got quite the suprise when the wheels started spining
Back in the days that I smoked, everybody would bum cigs off me. One day I was cleaning up the shop with a horse hair broom---I got an idea---the first four cigs in the package had a horse hair slipped between the paper and the tobacco. the bums would light those bummed cigs up and oh what a face they would make. that sure broke those bad boys from bumming from me.
Reminds me of a prank we played on an old mechanic who used to smoke a pipe and had some of the most godawful smelling tobacco! One of the mechs accused him of growing it in his shoe. Once he left his 'stash' laying out so one of the guys cut up some rubber bands and brown gasket material and mixed it with his tobacco. Made a terrible stink and judging from his looks after a couple drags, it must've tasted worse. The dealership service manager was a real ladies man - so he thought. His office had a big 2 way window that looked across a hallway and into the service department. He was always bragging about his dates, conquests, etc. So one of the guys gets one of those really cheap blowup dolls, y'know the kind in the back of the magazines, guaranteed to please your wildest fantasies for only $9.95? - with all the proper - ahem - anatomical features and orifices? So he blows up sweetie pie and parks "her" in the service manager's office for all passers-by to see, with a sign "Oh Hal, I really enjoyed last night!" It lasted a couple hours, till he came in later that morning, but long enough for everyone in the dealership to see "her". We had this really cute office gal at the dealership. Nearly every day her boyfriend would come & pick her up for lunch. The employees parking lot was in back just behind the body shop, which had standard garage doors & windows that appeared to be one-way glass. Well one day one of the guys noticed when the office gal got back from lunch she and her boyfriend would get out and they'd liplock for a minute or 2 in the lot. Now this was back in the days when miniskirts were in fashion and that gal had some nice legs. Well he'd take and go up the back of her skirt, into her panties and grab a cheek. GREAT SHOW! It all ended one day when we cut out some cardboard squares and put numbers from 1 to 10 on 'em, then just as he grabbed a handful, we opened the garage door, held up the signs and started clapping and cheering! She turned beet red, he jumped in the car and that ended our free peep show.
Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohahahahahahhahahahahahhaooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
I heard a story about about a vintage restoration shop, one of the techs had just finished assembly of a very rare Ferrari v12, when he went on break someone went over to his bench and placed a single new piston ring still in its wrapper on his bench next to the engine.
A signal light flasher hooked to the hot side of the coil. If you want to have a life time enemy at work, wrap saran wrap over the toilet and lower the seat.
That's a good one. Back in high school, I worked in a restaurant and a couple of the short-order cooks were pot heads. We didn't care until we started getting trouble in the back parking lot from some of their aggressive "friends" after they started dealing small time. My co-worker took the brunt of the abuse. One day he soaked fresh parsley in lighter fluid then dried it in a nice dry hot space in the kitchen over a few days. He rolled up a couple with some papers he found in the back, just like rolling tacos. One of the pot heads turned into a bit of a bully, so my co-worker decided he'd make a good mark and gave them to him. He came back in the kitchen in a rage - I have no idea how that thing burned, but management tossed both of the troublemakers after the scene they made. Of course management didn't believe a word they said, called the cops, and my coworker blinked innocently. Ah, the foolishness of youth.
Wasn't really an old timer prank, but car related just the same. In high school, we had a split class in the middle of the day. We'd have half the class, break for lunch, then come back for the last half each day. There was an alcove just outside of the classroom and the teacher took the previlege of parking right outside the double doors to the classroom leading to the back of the school. During lunch break one day, a couple of guys got the idea to take the bolts out of the center divider and roll the teacher's VW bug inside and parked it right in front of his desk. We were all in our seats when he came in and sat down to address the class and looked up to see his view blocked by his car. He looked at it a second and got up without making any expression or saying a word and left the classroom. We thought we were dead. He came back with the principle and vice principle in tow and they all stood there just looking at the car without saying a word and no expression. They finally grinned and called the yearbook staff to take a picture. They they simply said. "OK guys, take it back out where you found it and don't ever do it again". You could see them grin and shake their heads as they made it back out to the hall way. Thems were the good ole days..................
Ok,I'm laughing my ass off at some of these pranks! Here's one that I didnt see that my dad told me how to do, but it only involves older VW bugs, VW buses, and Karmenghias. If your friend has one of these,open the engine hatch when they arent looking. There are 2 wires on one side of the ignition coil,I cant remember if its the positive or negative,but one is a wire for the reverse lights.(Yeh I know,what is the reverse light wire doing on the coil? thats how they wired those VW's)Take that wire and plug it on the opposite side of the coil from where it is. Now,when your friend puts his bug in reverse the engine dies!!! This is now grounding the coil when in reverse.They will never figure this out. I did this to a girl I knew that had a 67 bug.She was baffled and was whining to me,"Bob,my car keeps dying when I put it in reverse" We all couldnt help smirking and laughing so I told her I could fix it and I did.But I never told her I tampered with her car so I could do it again later.
In college there was a guy from South America telling stories about parties where pre-rolled joints filled big trays for the guests. I broke open a tea bag and rolled the tea into a 'joint' and lit it when he was around one day. It looked and smelled just like marijuana. The look on his face was worth it when he demanded a hit!
My father had an early long nose International truck that he used on the farm. He would turn the key off for a few seconds, turn it back on and there would be a large explosion, scaring all manor of man and creature. One day he was using the truck to catch Silage in a bin on the back (Silage is long grass cut and forced though an 1/8" gap with massive force by a silage chopper, then transported though a shute at high speed) He did his old trick and the guy on the tractor jumped and hit his head on the cab roof, yep pretty funny...untill they both got to the next corner...as my father swung on the wheel to bring the Inter round he turned his head and the silage shute was facing the window...the guy smiled and promptly filled the interior of the cab with freshly cut grass! It was so full my Dad couldn't get his chest off the steering wheel and they had to open the door to let the pressure off so he could get out!
they used to fart into the filter for the sand blaster fresh air supply i would say that air was not too fresh!!!!!
When at a young tender 16,I got a job at a tire store that did mechanical work. there were two Italian brothers who did the repairs and me and another kid who did tire work. Wanting to learn more, I would do small tasks, like air filter changes. The two brothers told me that the paper element I was ready to change was a washable element and told me to take it over to the parts washer and clean it. I hesitated and explained I knew better. They replied."You try'in to tell us you know more than a certified mechanic?" "No",I replied. I took filter over to the washer and began to clean it. As it began to shred, I turned to see them in the office snickering, laughing and pointing at me. I got real red faced. Few years later,I am now a ASE certified tech. and working at a Mercedes garage. The boss was very particular. He had just rebuilt an engine and was ready to start it when he had to test drive a customer's car. While he is gone,I pull rhe cluster and hook up another oil press.guage behind the dash. He returns and has me start the car. "tell me when the pressure is up",he says. I keep revving the engine and telling him,"No pressure,yet!". He panicks reaches in across me and grabs the key and turns it off,almost hysterical. me and the other tech are rolling laughing and let him in on what we did. He was not amused...to say the least!
A little bit O/T, but Some military related humor: * During Preventive Maintenance checks, we'd get a young private to do a "boom test" on M1 Tanks. We'd tell him to stand on the hull and shout "BOOM" into the barrel. The gunner would be inside, waiting to hear the Boom, and would tell the private "Louder" until he was screaming. ** Give a recruit a hammer & a piece of chalk and instruct him to inspect the hull armor plating on a Bradley Fighting Vehicle for "soft spots". Told him "...once you hear a shallow 'ping', mark it with an X." 2 hours later, "X" marked the spot - at least 3 or 4.... Then when done with that, check the Bradley suspension for weak shocks. . .
I'd always roll my timing tape back 10 degrees on the harmonic balancer and get a buddy to use the timing light while i moved the distributor - i'd claim i couldn't see. You should see the looks i'd get after locking the distr down at 48 degrees!
i once drilled a hole in the back of an AC condensor in a buddies car and routed the windshield washer nozzle inside so it would hit the driver. then hooked the water pump wire to the ignition switch and waited. the best one i heard about my buddy did. they took a teacher's VW bug and picked it up and put it in the teacher's living room. they found a way to disassemble the french doors to get it in, but made it look like they took the car apart to move it. they took a handful of random bolts and left them on the drivers' seat. the teacher took apart the entire car to get it out of his house and figure out which bolts were missing. -drZ
We used to work construction jobs out of town with a guy that thought he was Gods' gift to women.......BIG ego. Anyway he had this old Ford truck and everyone was always hot and ready to haul ass home on Fridays. His truck was really dusty and needed a wash job so we wrote on the tail gate in big letters "Sorry Girls...I'm Gay". For the next 200 interstate miles he was passing girls just a smil'in & wav'in like he was all that. Then they would repass him laugh'in at him. Boy was he pissed when he saw that on his truck.....But I think it brought him down a notch or two! The guys got me once by melting a Hersheys kiss in my underwear then stuffing in down in my dirty work clothes for my wife to find when I got home and she went to do laundry! (I guess it was better than some girls' panties!)
I have a friend who when he gets in his truck, the first thing he does before putting it in gear is to put the wipers on fast and hit the washer button to clean his windshield. On a very hot dry bright sunny day, I put in about half a bottle of thick pink hand soap in his washer bottle thats about half full. Sure enough at 3pm, windshield nice and hot, on goes the wipers and washers, the windshield smears, now its about 30 miles ride home on I-95, windshield soap smeared, can't hardly see, wipers sticking to the glass, peeking through the streaks, and cussing me all the way home, and then the phone call, "alright c.s., what did you put in my washer fluid?"
i got a call on my mentor's phone, and a buddy of his asked me if he had a rubber feeler guage, so i asked my mentor if he had one, and my mentor replied "yeah, it's next to the board stretcher"
When in 11th. grade a girl friend of mine worked in a office to mark down any kids that were absent from a class, this was always on a wednesday. So i would tell her to throw away absent slips for me and 3 of my buddies. So I drive my car to school and wait for the guys to come on their school bus. We take off for a ride and end up at a hi-school 20 miles away where we would pickup 4 girls for lunch take them back and end up back at our school in time for the guys to catch the bus to go home. We never got caught cutting school. That was back in 58.
Over the years I've seen and participated ina few pranks, some good, some less so. Here's a few of my favorites: A couple of guys used to ride to work together, and the "cool dude" that owned the Blazer they rode in always backed it into his spot at work to make a quick exit and beat work traffic. Someone hung a "Just Married" sign on it and it stayed there for a couple days. Another co-worker used to have this ungodly bright light hanging above his lathe at work. The light and the switch were low enough to reach, but still over head. One night the night shift unscrewed the bulb and cut a circle out of the some clear plastic sheet, stuffed it into the socket and replaced the bulb. The next moring, the machinist came in, flicked on the light..nothing. So he replaced the bulb, still nothing. He called the company electrician, who again replaced the bulb, then the switch, then made his way to the breaker panel and started testing for power. Two hours later, the offending disc was discovered, along with two red faces. Another co-worker was known as the phone man. He delighted in going into other worker's shops or offices when they weren't there and applying Vaseline (if he liked you) or Never Seize (if he didn't) to the earpeice, then replacing the receiver on the hook (older desk phone), then using a zip-tie on the cord. Then he would go down to his shop, call the number and let it ring until the electrician (or whoever) ran into the shop, out of breath, then picked up the phone. At this point, with the cord tied short, the phone would fall to the floor, but undeterred the victim would pick up the phone, base, reciver and all, and put the slimy mess to his ear. I was never quite so inventive, but I had my moments. Once, during a breakdown (I'm a maintenance machinist) I was on one lathe, turning out parts as fast as I could, and another machinist was working on the same job. He however felt the company owed him a living, and he was taking a smoke break about every 10 minutes. After about the 6th one, I applied a slim coat of Never Seize to the handles of his lathe. He returned, got a fistfull of the stuff, accidently wiped his face, getting more on his nose, then looked at me and said, "I guess I should've stayed at my machine." He got the point, I got my laugh and we both got the job done without further delay.
Guy worked for me, nicknamed "Bear" which tells you about his appearance. About 60yo at the time and was always telling us how dangerous he is with the girls and what he'd do/done to them sexually. So I decided to "Mythbuster" his tall tales. My out of town, hot looking, 30yo sister, comes for a visit. I have her come out to the wrecking yard and act like she needs some tires, but has no money. The other guys and I see her driving up, so we go out in the shop which has a candid view of the front desk. She comes in the door and tells Bear what she needs. Then comes around from the customer side of the counter to the business side and starts playing "touchy-feely" with Bear and telling him she has no money but she'd trade sex for tires. Bear is backing up, saying "uh.... uh.... no, I have a girlfriend and my boss wouldn't like that". So, my sister gets more aggressive backing him in the corner and hugs him while grabbing his ass and telling him "they could do it later". Us guys in the shop are trying not to laugh and about then, Bear bellows out "MARK!!! COME HERE!!! WE'VE GOT A PROBLEM IN THE OFFICE" myth..........BUSTED
There's a set of Railroad tracks in Visalia , Ca that legend has it.....in the 50's on Halloween a school bus stalled on the tracks and was hit by a train. I've never verified the story, but most High School kids in the area believe it really happened...Anyways "Legend" is if you park on the now deserted tracks at midnight on Halloween, you can hear the faint sound of a train and kids screamin. I know... fucked up...... Well a buddy of mine in high school had a big lifted f-250 with a train horn....so on Halloween we gave some jackass kids the scare of their lives. We parked the truck on the tracks about 1/4 mile away and waited. When they were sitting there for a while we turned on the lights, blared the train horn and drove straight for them. You should've seen their silhouettes through the windows hahahaha They were freaking out, they put the car in gear and took off hahaha.
The Jalopy Journal
