The Jalopy Journal
Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by 57 shaker, Nov 1, 2008.
wet cigarette butt down the coil wire hole of a distributor cap
When I worked at a tire shop when I was younger, we of course did the old wheel weight thing. We used to get an entire strip of the 1/2 ounce sticky weights and stick them on the inside of a front tire rim.
We would also blast each other with the "cheetah" bead seater full of water or baking soda (we used to collect used batteries).
The best feud was between my two co-workers, which I'll call coworker "A" & "B". It started with A hiding B's car keys in our shop refridgerator. In retaliation, B took the other's car keys and drove A's car to one of the neighboring building's parking lot. Then, A took B's car to the same parking lot and put it on jack stands, removed all four tires and hid them in the shop. Finally, B bought a few bags of manure from the nearby Home Depot and dumped the bags into A's trunk. That's where it ended.
When I was in college one of the guys across the hall was always bragging about his success with women.
But he didn't have a car and had a "hot prospect".
Guy next door not only had a car it was a Station Wagon!
Guy borrowing car made mistake of letting us know what movie they were going to see.
Just after he left we gathered mattress, sheets (leopard spot, even) whisky bottle half full of coke/sprite mix and as soon as they were in theater we opened car with spare key and inserted mattress, etc neatly arranged, even matching pillow.
And hid two cassett tape players, one on record, other with a booming voice saying "Do you know where your children are??"
We did not have to put up with any more tales of his "conquests" after that.
Good friend of mine told me of a prank pulled on him. When he was 16 he worked at a gas station in S.W. Detroit for a couple brothers. I guess they were the king of practical jokes and they gave him hell working there. After he had worked there awhile they set it up with a local prostitute to "show the kid a good time" when he showed up. They sent him to her place to drop something off & told him to come right back. When he didn't get back on time they knew she accomplished her mission. When he finally showed up they gave him hell, wanting to know where he'd been for an hour. Finally they started laughing & told him they had set it all up. My buddy said it was like that the whole time he worked there. He credits those brothers for helping him "grow up" and also becoming a hell of a prankster himself.
One remember one prank my buddy pulled when we worked at a Ford dealer. One of the guys was building a new house (a hot head of course) & was always complaining about the inspectors nit picking. After he got it wired & the drywall up, my buddy called from the service managers office (with all of us in there) saying he was the county inspector and he had to remove all the wring in his place & start over. They argued for 10 minutes, the hot head guy spitting, stuttering & swearing at him. Finally the guy looks at the office and sees all of us laughing. He just slammed the phone down & wouldn't talk to us for a couple hours. When he got over it, he laughed & said "that was a good one".
Not a prank but a pay back..
I have been doing this for years. If I pull into a parking spot and the vehicle next to me is a douche bag and has parked right on the line so it is hard for me to get out, I push his side mirror in. You know the one that will fold back. Passenger side is best.
I drove a big rig for years and always wanted to hookup a washer pump to spray the windshield of tailgaters. If my truck already needed a bath, I have been known to slowly empty a P bottle out the driver window. Drivers seem to back off a bit after that. <O</O
Had a friend that I worked with that had been trying to get some money together for a Riviera that he wanted bad. He was so worried it was going to sell. One night while working at the plant I was in the shop area and saw some really fine dust by the lathe, looked just like gold. He was always trying to prank me so I came up with a plan to get him back. Went and drew a little map on some paper, got it damp, folded it a few times, crumpled it up and then put some of the "gold" dust folded up in the map.
I then went and found him and asked if he could keep a really big secret! He assured me he could which was bs! Anyway I pulled out the map and told him I'd found a creek full of this stuff and had just had it verified at a local jewelry shop as pure gold. I told him I was hunting in the mountain back country wilderness and found it. Told him I needed help getting as much out as I could before someone else found it. Told him it would be way more than he needed for the Riviera but he had to keep it a secret where he got it.
He was on cloud 9 all night at work, every time I saw him he was talking to himself, grinning from ear to ear, high fiving the wall, he just knew we had hit it big. At midnight when we got off he wanted to see the map and gold one more time so under the street lamp I proceeded to unfold it and then "accidentally" drop it. He was on the pavement trying to pick every little dust piece of brass or what ever it was up and I was laughing so hard I thought I was going to piss myself. When it dawned on him he was so let down I thought he was going to cry, he had it spent, he had the Riviera and more!
While working at a Saturn agency,we had a car come in for finding a rattle.Well finely we took the back seat out.We fond a soda can with ball bearings and stones in it.There was also a note that said this.The guy who owns this car is an asshole.You can take it out or add to it and send him on his way.We just buttoned it up and said we couldn't find the noise.
That's funny. My buddy who worked at my old tire shop used to pull out prick customers' cars out of our bay. When he parked them, he used to fart in them and shut the door.
Clear Saran Wrap across a toilet bowl with opened ketchup packs under the seat,then unscrew the light in the restroom....always a winner!
a coworker was fabbing up some part for one of our mow tractors, and had just welded up this beauty of a part and left it on the welding table to cool. he disappears for another job in the shop, and somebody sees this fine handywork, and spotwelds it to the table. i didnt get to see the look on his face as he went to grab it while walking by, but others laughed their asses off when he grabbed it and it didnt go with him. he took it good naturedly and laughed right along with them when he saw what was holding him up.
A wet cigarette filter in the distributor cap where the secondary plugs in. Plug the secondary in on it; the car will run until the filter dries out.
Worked with a guy that had a late 60s ford truck that had the idea of putting a holley carb on it for better fuel milage so after he did we would sneek out and dump some gas in his tank this went on for a week or two and he was braging about his milage then we stop adding fuel and he was under the hood every day trying to figure out what happend to the carb because the milage dropped off.
We never festup to it.
We would swap out my buddys Plymouth rotor for a Ford rotor, the Ford rotor fits just fine but is 180 degrees out of time .
I went to high school in the 60's with a moron who thought it was cute to light off the flame throwers he'd rigged in the tail pipes of his 59 ford when someone walked behind his car in the school parking lot.
I drove a school bus and left school every day an hour ahead of the time when school let out. One day I was walking thru the parking lot to get my bus and noticed a couple guys behind the moron's car. They'd taken a pair of potatoes and shoved them in his duals and were using a pair of broomsticks to push them as far as possible into the pipes. About an hour after school let out, a wrecker showed up and towed the moron's car home. Never did hear of little Dickie throwing flames at anyone else after that
One bloke used to like filling toolboxes (full of tools) with expanding foam, or putting silicone under your toolbox when you had left for the day, sticking it to the benchtop.
But he made the fatal mistake of leaving his toolbox unlocked one day on his day off. So we proceeded with a little "payback"- first, we drilled through the bottom of his toolbox, and through the benchtop into an under-bench cupboard (which had doors). A bolt with 2 BIG washers was put through the holes, and fastened with a nut under the bench. The remaining thread was then bent at 90 degrees with a hammer. The underbench doors were locked, and the keyhole filled with epoxy. Then around the edge of the toolbox, a thin bead of silicon was placed, so it would look like it was only held down with silicon. Of course the tools were replaced, and "secured" with expanding foam. The lid of the toolbox was also welded shut and the welds painted over.
When he turned up the next morning, and went to shift his toolbox, it naturally didn't move, and he saw the planted silicon, and got up on the bench yanking at the handle, the handle breaks off, he goes arse over head off the bench, & spends the rest of the day undoing our handywork. He stopped filling up toolboxes with expanding foam, and we just pissed ourselves laughing all day!
Add tire weights to one of his tear tires,3oz, Front tire may cause accident.
This trick was pulled on me many years ago at a race track, handed me a spark plug wire from a magneto to hold while it was spun by hand to see if it had spark, and YES it did have spark, got my attention! I pulled that trick on a few people and it always got a laugh with a few !@#$%^&* to go with. Not a car trick, while serving my aprenticship for Tool& Die trade, I was sent to a industrial supply house fo a gallon of "file oil" and a set of "left handed allen wrenches " and YES, I was that naive. No longer naive, just old ,still waiting on smart. John
For whatever reason, some of my classmates decided to see who could collect the most roadkill in their truck beds in a week. Needless to say, the parking lot was pretty rank. (Small farm town in NW Oklahoma) One of the items collected was a skunk. I proceeded to place it on top of the spare tire of an underclassmen's truck. He spent several dollars at the local car wash every day for a week trying to clean the smell of the skunk he must have hit. The flowing week I fessed up, but let him pull the bloated thing out from under there.
We would pour a gallon of sump oil under the engine of a parked car at work, then watch from upstairs window after work when the sap (usually deserving) flip his lid, and try to find the big oil "leak".
LOL I may have already posted this and it is actually a motorcycle related story but some of us will go fast on anything with wheels so, I used to date the world's dumbest brunette. I had this old bike that was magneto fired and it would get a little cantankerous on occasion. I would tell her to hold the business end of the spark plug wire while I kicked it with the plugs out. If she cussed and I got slugged I knew I was getting fire and she would do it every time. LOL
Getting back to cars, and old fun thing was to find a guy with a mechanical oil pressure gauge, and dribble a little oil on the floor mat under his gauge. A real meticulous car guy would be under there trying to fix the leak.
We used to tie a wire tie to the drive shaft leaving the end long enough to slap the floor board. I guess not an old time car prank but it will drive a an crazy until he finds the wire tie.
At the dealership ,every new parts guy got the same treatment.
We would heat a bearing up with the torch and carry it to the parts counter with plyers .
When the new guy wasn't looking we would toss it on the counter, and wait for him to pick it up.
I remember years ago my dad telling me about a time when he and his partner were working at a hospital. On the site the hospital was demo-ing an old x-Ray room. It was lined with lead bricks inside the walls. His partner snuck a brick into the bottom of my dad toolbox (an 8x16 hand box). My dad said he about blew a nut out when he went to snatch it off the floor when leaving. He still has the brick. That thing must weigh 20-30#!
The old zip ties on the driveshaft is still a good one. Unfortunately the safety Gestapo has really dampened the mood of having any fun anymore, at work anyway.
I only read 8 pages before writing this so if it's been said already I apoligise but this one was VERY, VERY SPECIAL for ME .......... had done it to several guys that thought they were motor heads but NONE ever figured it out ..... anyway ... PRETTEST GIRL in high school... Frannie ..... no way did I ever think I was gonna' get next to that !!! SO ... she pulls into a the local hang out ..... goes in .... I pop the hood and move the coil wire from the dizzy and change places with one of the spark plug wires in the cap.... She comes out ... CAR ALMOST seems to start ...... I let her run the battery down kinda' low..... and then -- HERE COMES THE HERO walking by !!! I say " lemme' look" ..... put the wires in correctly and it ( of course ) fires up INSTANTLY !!!! She runs out and give me a KISS that makes my toes curl !!!!! WE ran away and got married 6 months later -- still in high school -- ( And didn't HAVE TO ---remember THEM DAYS ?? !!) .... lasted 47 years until I lost her to cancer ...... SOOO GLAD I did that sneaky little trick ...... Miss you LOTS baby ...
Great story skipperman.
TRUE story brother ........ BEST MOVE I EVER MADE !!
Not mine but her goes... Seems a fellow in a repair shop always arrived late due to taking his child to school each morning. Service manager had no problem with it, saying just work later and cover your time. Another mechanic had an issue with this and would pull a prank on the guy occasionally. Well, one day the while staying late the mechanic drilled and fitted zirc fittings to the back of the pranksters toolbox, then proceeded to fill the entire locked box with chassis grease! You can imagine the resulting mess when the prankster opened the box early the next morning. The pranks stopped.
One cold winter night dad and a friend filled an air bubble half full of water, then charged it with air.
They went to another friends house who had just had a very expensive alignment job done. they delflated the front passenger side tire and then re filled it with the water bubble (holding it upside down to get the water in the tire).
They planned for it to have a horrible wobble effect, and did the passenger tire so if anything it "should" pull to the ditch.
Guy called the next day to say how his car was hell to drive. took all of both arms to keep it straight, and if he let off the wheel it made a 90 degree turn into oncoming traffic. Joke failed, had to tell him what was up. Still cant see why it turned the wrong way. Somehow the water never froze either
Not exactly car related, but close. Used to work in a warehouse. We would always wait for someone to be pulling a pallet down from the top of the pallet rack. While their attention is diverted, place a piece of bubble wrap behind the forklift rear tire. When they back up, sounds like gunshots going off inside that concrete warehouse. Never failed to get the heartrate up. Yes, it got pulled on me too. Still funny no matter which side you're on.
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