Old Time Sayings? from the Hot Rod Garage

-directed to the low-man on the totem pole in the body shop:

"About the only thing he's good at is polishing the fireman's helmet"

 

Heard another one at the cruise-in last night:

"That car is rarer than hen's teeth"

 

My Dads favorite "He thought he had to fart but he shit!"


If you can't fix it with a hammer It's an electrical problem!!!!!!!!!

 

Once while watching an inept driver attempting to back up to a loading dock:

"holy cats...this guy couldn't back up a toilet!"

while admiring a beautiful female coworker sashaying past,

"I'd do her a favor, and help her with her insecurity issues"

shouted from a car,

"hey miss, my battery died, would you jump me?"

 

blacker than a whores heart!

 

Never say anything more prophetic than "Watch this".

 

That's a "Rolls Kenardly", as in the special Kenardly model from Rolls Royce.

 

I love old time sayin's!

My favorite is "that thing's shivvering like a cat shitting eazor blades"...



Sent from my DROID device using the TJJ mobile app

 

You tell'em horse shit. You'v bin on the trail before.

 

If it had no power he would say.
it would not pull a wet string out of a cats ass.
busy as a two peckerd goat.
shines like a ruby in a goats ass.

 

Common sense is not so common

 

He's full of wind and piss like a barber's cat on a diet of beans and tea

From a long lost friends mother way back when...

 

Oldie but a goody " I'm so broke i gotta jerk off the dog to feed the cat"


Posted from the TJJ App for iPhone & iPad

 

couldn't help myself....

Tighter than a bulls ass in fly season

 

I've done so much with so little, I can do anything with nothing.

 

A few prime examples of my elderly famly members sayings.

Like my coffee like my women Black and bitter.

If you had a brain youd be dangerous.

Id rather owe you forever than cheat you out of it.

Her ass looks like 30 lbs of taters in a 25 lbs sack.

Rather be lucky than good.

 

Taking about a guy that is cheap, "He is so tight that every time he blinks is eyes he skins his Dick back".

"A Horse that shits quick don't shit long"

Whats going on? "oh just mildewing to keep from molding".

 

Did I miss "clumsy as a cub bear trying to fuck a football"??

 

That car's been hit more times than George Foreman.

 

How about:"Colder than a tax collectors heart".
One from Dad."BOY,you`re paid to do.NOT think".
Blacker than 10ft down Grandpa`s coal chute.
Good luck.Have fun.Be safe.
Leo

 

My Dad always used to say "That's tighter than a frogs ass...and that's water tight"