Register now to get rid of these ads!

Hot Rods into hot rodding? learn the lingo...

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by LowKat, Feb 14, 2009.

  1. So you want to be a hot rodder?
    You're ready to amass parts, tools, and...
    Whoa there, big fella!...
    The 1st step is learning the lingo...

    Here's a handy hot rod dictionary

    A-Bone:
    Model A Ford...
    also a-gift for a-dog​

    Bored:
    frequent complaint of wife/girlfriend at car show​

    Blower:
    lawn maintenance device...
    used to earn money for supercharger​

    Channel:
    what to change...
    if 'American Hot Rod' comes on TV​

    Dago axle:
    short for: "San Diego axle"
    note: avoid using word "Dago" around Italian rodders

    Deuce:
    hot rod slang for 1932 Ford....
    also bathroom slang for "going number 2"
    example: "I gotta drop a deuce"​

    Flathead:
    garage injury...
    caused by Harbor Freight jackstands​

    Four-Banger:
    technique used...
    by wife/girlfriend to lure you out of garage​

    Frenching:
    prelude to a four-banger...
    example: "he frenched her headlights"​

    Gasser:
    exhaust fumes from a Burrito Supreme...
    example: "Don't blame me... that was Willy's Gasser"​

    Hiboy:
    car show greeting...
    from female admiring your rod​

    Jigglers:
    what you admire...
    about this female​

    Jugs:
    see "Jigglers"​

    Lowboy:
    you, after wife/girfriend brains you...
    with tire iron for admiring those jiggler jugs​

    Mill:
    what car show crowd does...
    while wife/girlfriend brains you with tire iron​

    Nerf:
    material you wished...
    your wife/girlfriend's tire iron was made from​

    Ported:
    opposite of imported... ​

    Quickchange:
    what your underwear needs...
    after seeing the Halibrand swap meet prices​

    Rat Rod:
    carefully assembled car using traditional 1950s techniques...
    tack welds, carpenter's nails, glue, zip ties, velcro, smeared feces,
    the kitchen sink and midnight demolition derbys at the Pick N Pull. ​

    Also what non-rodders will call your car...
    Examples: "Cool rat rod!" and "Is that a rat rod?"​

    Relieved:
    how Willy felt...
    after getting rid of that gasser​

    Section:
    what wife/girlfriend will do to you...
    if she sees all those parts receipts​

    Shoebox:
    where to hide parts receipts...
    from wife/girlfriend​

    Split Wishbones:
    method for deciding...
    who pays the bill at "Roscoe's Chicken & Waffles"​

    Stroke:
    what wife/girlfriend has...
    after finding your parts receipt shoebox​

    Suicide perch:
    probably a good option...
    if wife/girlfriend find the receipts​

    Three pot:
    triple carb intake manifold...
    also describes a deluxe Tennessee outhouse​

    Toploader:
    manual transmission with shift rails on top...
    also refers to the toilet/outhouse.
    examples:
    "He dropped a toploader into the deuce"
    or
    "He dropped a deuce into the toploader"​

    Tuck & Roll:
    emergency procedure...
    after igniting yourself with an acetelyne torch​

    X-Member:
    the guy...
    who can't pay his car club dues​

    Z'ing:
    sleeping....
    example:
    "after she found his parts receipts, he ended up z'ing in his rod"​

    ------------------------------------------------------------​

    not sure of the author but found this here:

    I did some editing...
    Feel free to add/subtract....​
     
  2. ratpak
    Joined: Oct 21, 2008
    Posts: 85

    ratpak
    Member
    from Onsted, Mi

    Thats great!!! Very funny collection.... Im laughing but my wife isnt haha
     
  3. Royalshifter
    Joined: May 29, 2005
    Posts: 15,780

    Royalshifter
    Moderator
    from California

    Burnout....something you thought never to happen.
     
  4. crackernutz
    Joined: Mar 21, 2007
    Posts: 408

    crackernutz
    Member
    from tx

    I have some 6 ton jack stands from harbor freight that have yet to smash my melon
     
    Register now to get rid of these ads!

  5. Guitar Guy
    Joined: Nov 24, 2008
    Posts: 340

    Guitar Guy
    Member

    Thats bitchin" man!!!
     
  6. Key word... yet! :D:eek:
     
  7. I got a good laugh from these. the definition of Flathead was the best one by far.
     
  8. rick finch
    Joined: May 26, 2008
    Posts: 2,003

    rick finch
    Member

    Dude, that is the best! Thanks for the laugh out loud moments.:D
     
  9. blackout
    Joined: Jul 29, 2007
    Posts: 1,270

    blackout
    Member

    That's some funny stuff right there.
     
  10. S.F.
    Joined: Oct 19, 2006
    Posts: 2,894

    S.F.
    Member

  11. donut29
    Joined: Mar 6, 2006
    Posts: 1,518

    donut29
    Member
    from canton MI

    I love the list:D
     
  12. Itchijohnson
    Joined: Mar 17, 2008
    Posts: 42

    Itchijohnson
    BANNED
    from Colorado

    Funny shit, I got one of those scars from my harbor freight jack stands..And my wife is forever looking for my shoebox. Cheers
     
  13. Muttley
    Joined: Nov 30, 2003
    Posts: 18,410

    Muttley
    Member

    Fart jokes never fail to bring a smile to my face.
     
  14. H.A.M.B. (HoNkey) Ass Message Board: the "new" red wheeled, flat black, site for the uninitiated Discovery/TLC/SPEED channel remote control gods who find it we need to see everything under the sun thats not related to Traditional Hot Rods/Off topic B.S.

    Yes, I know it is Hokey Ass Message Board.-Weeks
     
  15. 2-TONED
    Joined: Jan 31, 2005
    Posts: 1,683

    2-TONED
    Member

    Very good!! :d
     
  16. 21tat
    Joined: Jun 8, 2006
    Posts: 829

    21tat
    Member

    That was fun.
     
  17. been a couple years, so bringn' it up for the FNG's
     
  18. hotrod_32
    Joined: Mar 8, 2006
    Posts: 496

    hotrod_32
    Member

  19. chubbie
    Joined: Jan 14, 2009
    Posts: 2,294

    chubbie
    Member

    great, now I'll be thinking of new ones all day:rolleyes:
     
  20. Red Dragon Racing
    Joined: Nov 17, 2008
    Posts: 146

    Red Dragon Racing
    Member
    from Indiana

    I'm just not going to show it to my wife. :D
     
  21. Haha, I know that's an old post, but it's still good for the laughs.
     
  22. 1950ChevySuburban
    Joined: Dec 20, 2006
    Posts: 6,206

    1950ChevySuburban
    Member Emeritus
    from Tucson AZ

    Funny stuff there, missed it the first time.

    Guess I'm bulemic, 'cause I'm glad it came back up!
     

Share This Page

Register now to get rid of these ads!

Archive

Copyright © 1995-2020 The Jalopy Journal: Steal our stuff, we'll kick your teeth in. Terms of Service. Privacy Policy.

Atomic Industry
Forum software by XenForo™ ©2010-2014 XenForo Ltd.