The Jalopy Journal
Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by iwanaflattie, Feb 6, 2013.
If the moon was made of BBQ'ed spare ribs, would you eat it?
OT...they were called hubcaps way back when they covered only the hub...some of us just haven't made the transition to wheel covers. That was the question wasn't it?
why is it called a wheel cover when most of the gheto calls it a RIMS?
If the plural of goose is geese how come the plural of moose isn't meese.
Cause..they don't know @#$%
Because the fools that call wheels "rims" are idiots.
A pair of pants, shorts, or underwear. Huh? You are wearing two??? Why not just pant or short? You wear a shirt, right?
Why is a semi-truck called that? It's actually a tractor-trailer, but hey!
Why do people push an agenda, when you can't see it to start with? What do you grab onto to push it?
Why are things that are life-like, not really so?
And, why do women go to the public restroom in gaggles of at least three or more?
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'...
but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'?
Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead? **
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?**
Why does someone** **believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?** *
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?**
Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?'
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over? **
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?**
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?**
And my FAVORITE......** **
The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons are suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.*
Why does your nose run and your feet smell?
This thread just provided my amusement for the day!
When I was a kid, people called 'em all hubcaps. Only car dealers and parts departments called them wheel covers.
Ever hear of anyone "stealing wheel covers"?
I once read a story about some guy stealing hubcaps,
maybe they were wheel covers
This always gets me too, I see threads with a title that asks for help to identify these rims, and then in their first post they say "I picked these WHEELS up at a swap meet"...
Maybe wheelkid should change his name to rimkid...
Funny stuff, keep it coming.
It's time to get over the whole Wheels versus Rims thing - they have become synonymous when talking about the round metal things that the tires mount to.
By definition a rim is; The circular outer part of a wheel, furthest from the axle. And since many wheels now days are one piece, the "Rim" portion of the Wheel does not come apart so how do you distinguish the Rim from the Wheel?
Even wheels companies use the word Rim when describing a new product.
It's kind of like the whole Engine / Motor debate.
Exactly. Lots of people stole hubcaps (even when they were large), but nobody ever stole "wheel covers".
If he changes his name to rimkid I aint goin' drinking with him.
How come a tooth brush isn't called a teeth brush?
if it is a pear how come there is only one?
So Don if the outer section of the wheel where the tire is mounted is called a rim then wouldn't mounting tires be called rimming?
Actually is has nothing to do with the rest of the thread but the proper mid town terminology for wheels around here is Wheelrin. So now that we have that settled what is a rin?
Beeno, you are indeed a funny guy.
A rin is an obsolete unit of Japanese currency equal to 1⁄1000 yen. Fell out of use after WWII. Not sure how that relates to current subject matter, or where exactly one would place a rin in conjunction with a wheel, rim, tire, hubcap or wheel cover. Maybe it's an overabundance of rins that causes wheel covers to separate from the wheels they're supposed to be covering.
Actually, the generally accepted concept of light and how it works is backwards. Light doesn't emanate from a source; rather, darkness is being absorbed. Technically, darkness is coming in the window all the time.
And if the plural of mouse isn't mouses but mice, why is the plural of house houses and not hice?
I'll leave the Rimming to the girls to perform
If it's a cap, should you wear it on your head?
Be right back, I ran out of popcorn (and buttered, Bean)
You use bubble bath?
If the Barnum and Bailey Circus has a cunning array of stunts,,,,,then what do the Victoria Secrets models have?-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------A stunning array of -----.
I gots a legitimate question.
Did cars get full wheel covers and did trucks get center caps in the later years???
Did trucks get full wheel covers or no?
why do we call a( single )tool "a pair of dikes"?I guess they only come in pairs.
If tin whistles are actually made of tin - what are fog horns made of then?
A male bird is a Cock and female a Hen. So are Peacocks and Peahens Peas ? JW
Are Paper boys made of Paper?
What music does a rubber band play ?
Why won't a Chocolate Fish swim ?
Why do they call it the Hokey Ass Message Board but they'll close your thread if the subject is too hokey or if you become too much of an ass?
Why can't a chicken cross the road without having its motives questioned ? JW
Why do your feet smell and your nose run?
They both cover the hub.
Separate names with a comma.