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Good CHEATING stories?

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by Groucho, Feb 15, 2007.

  1. powrshftr
    Joined: Mar 29, 2013
    Posts: 4,550

    powrshftr
    Member

    I like to use a die grinder to shape my aluminum heads more like cast iron stockers,then rough them up with a pneumatic needle scaler so they look like cast iron before I paint them.
    Works on heads,intakes,etc.
    I almost always paint the aluminum intake to look like a cast iron stocker after I grind off and texture the area where the Edelbrock logo is located too...;)

    Mostly just to mindf**k guys on the street when they think a stock 225hp 289 is all I've got:)

    Scott
     
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  2. slack
    Joined: Aug 18, 2014
    Posts: 523

    slack
    Member

    Good, clean, wholesome fun. :cool:
     
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  3. dan c
    Joined: Jan 30, 2012
    Posts: 2,058

    dan c
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    one that tickled me was about a guy who drag-raced a step-down hudson. the flagman knew it was using alcohol--he could tell from the telltale "vanilla" odor-- but inspections of the car always turned out negative. turned out the racer was using a windshield washer to "inject" it!
     
  4. This seemed to work pretty well on Saturday morning TV in the late 1960's and early '70's:
    tacks.jpg
     
  5. Ron Brown
    Joined: Jul 6, 2015
    Posts: 1,507

    Ron Brown
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Cool thread, glad its back up...This makes sense. I have a Bass Boat that is an honest 70 mph boat when running in slightly choppy or ripply water, but looses about 2-3 mph on glass slick water.
     
  6. Resurrecting a good thread, having just read start to finish. Like to relate a story told to me years ago by a first hand witness. His buddy was class autocrossing and felt he needed the balance of some illegal ballast over the passenger side front corner. Unscrewed an oversized fire extinguisher, dumped the baking soda and refilled with lead shot. When topped off with compressed air the gauge read in the green, which is all tech checked. Driver didn't take into account the extra side loading and during a run the non-extinguisher broke loose, caromed across the Corvair's flat floor and broke his ankle.
     
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  7. Fireball Five
    Joined: Oct 5, 2018
    Posts: 55

    Fireball Five
    Member

    I liked Smokeys'
    ' answer when asked if he thought this other guy was cheating?
    "Hell yes, cuz I'm cheating and he's beating me"
    Fireball 5
     
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  8. Bandit Billy
    Joined: Sep 16, 2014
    Posts: 6,305

    Bandit Billy
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    May be an urban myth but I heard about a lead shaped helmet that was placed on the floor during weigh in and removed after. That's just good planning!
     
  9. Supposedly Jim Oddy had a helmet like that for weigh in, evidently it slipped out from under his arm, cracked upon impact and busted.
    I've heard of stories of water inside frame rails to transfer weight to the rear upon launch.
     
  10. elba
    Joined: Feb 9, 2013
    Posts: 612

    elba
    Member

    My wife and I were at Thunder Valley NHRA Nationals about 10 years ago and we walked way back to the weight scales where the Po Stockers where weight after every run . Two guys in the scale building and nobody outside except the car being weighed, driver and a crew member . The crew member put a lead weight on the scale with the car and the two guys in the scale house never noticed .
     
  11. Bruce Lancaster
    Joined: Oct 9, 2001
    Posts: 21,682

    Bruce Lancaster
    Member Emeritus

    During the Super Stock wars that dominated car magazines in the first part of the 1960's, one of the off-brand magazines reported a rumor: Crank Shaft Company (the supplier for everyone building an expensive motor in those days) had filled an order for a 409 crankshaft heavily stroked on the rear three throws. NHRA always checked on a front cylinder...
    Next rumor, an issue or two down the road, inspectors were ordered to randomize cylinder choices.
     
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  12. oj
    Joined: Jul 27, 2008
    Posts: 6,247

    oj
    Member

    During the early days of MSD ignitions we discovered that they were suseptable to RF noise, there was a very unpopular arrogant asshole that had the 'best of everything' and a temper to go with it. We'd situate 'Cowboy' down near the finishline with his souped up CB radio (this was back when they sang songs about CB's and truckers) and whenever we ran the asshole ol'Cowboy wold hammer that CB radio just as we'd hit the traps and his ignition would all but jump out of the car, I could could hear it popping, banging an dbackfiring from my car. I had a magneto and the CB wouldn't affect me but it sure fuked his day up. We did that most of one summer and I think he went thru 3 or 4 of them boxes. He was one pissed dude at MSD.
     
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  13. DDDenny
    Joined: Feb 6, 2015
    Posts: 13,198

    DDDenny
    Member
    from oregon

    Now that's funny!
     
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  14. DDDenny
    Joined: Feb 6, 2015
    Posts: 13,198

    DDDenny
    Member
    from oregon

  15. dreracecar
    Joined: Aug 27, 2009
    Posts: 2,942

    dreracecar
    Member
    from so-cal

    Years ago at Mesa Marin Speedway, A racer was caught with movable ballast, They measured left side weight for which he pass, but then would open "gates" in the frame and mercury would flow to the left side. During the pre main stageing of the cars an official noticed what appeared to be water drops on the track, wiping with his foot the water did not go away and was discovered as Mercury. The event was stopped and the car was impounded, Next day Hazmat showed up to scrub the entire track, The racer was taken in to custody for having large amounts of mercury (cheating was the least of his problems) Seams that if the car were to crash, catch fire, the heated Mercury would form a deadly cloud and kill everybody in the stands
     
  16. dreracecar
    Joined: Aug 27, 2009
    Posts: 2,942

    dreracecar
    Member
    from so-cal

    Modern Nostalgia T/F must meet a minimum weight, also most cars are towed to the line. Well this old time racer always pushed his racer to the line. After the run they would reinstall the push bar to drive it over to the scales-- it was the worlds heaviest push bar, Nobody noticed that they removed it in staging and the scales were at the other end of the track and tech thought they made the run with it
     
  17. GearheadsQCE
    Joined: Mar 23, 2011
    Posts: 2,381

    GearheadsQCE
    Member

    I know about another racer that used Mercury to shift weight. Used compressed air to move it from side to side. Never got caught but when they blew down the tank a little Hg came out the vent. One of the crew members noticed it and went back the next day and swept up the evidence.

    Same racer would have lead on the left side during the race but on the cool down lap he would slide them down a ramp under the radio box which put them right at the right door.

    RIP Buddy
     
  18. Speedwrench
    Joined: Nov 21, 2009
    Posts: 1,024

    Speedwrench
    Member

    One of the associations we raced with required the car to have a fire suppression system. One of the cars won eleven or twelve features in one season - it would just drive around other cars like they were backing up. Turned out that a fire bottle makes a good container for nitrous oxide.
     
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  19. Bought a 40 Willys ( 1/4 mile car) Back in the 80's to put on the street. First thing I did was cut the rear bumper off ( was welded to frame) It was a piece of 3" pipe capped on both ends. When it hit the ground all it did was "Thud" went to grab and move it, musta weighed 3/400 lbs. Cut 1 end open and it was full of lead. Ya think that puppy didn't get traction?
     
  20. THE FRENCHTOWN FLYER
    Joined: Jun 6, 2007
    Posts: 2,938

    THE FRENCHTOWN FLYER
    Member
    from FRENCHTOWN

    That was a very common method of adding ballast and legal at the time.

    The rear bumper on my '33 coupe is an homage to those old weight bars.

    willys04.jpg
     
    Last edited: Nov 1, 2018
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  21. tpw35
    Joined: Feb 6, 2007
    Posts: 313

    tpw35
    Member

    In bandalero racing the rules state that if you run weight on the left side frame rail you have to run the same size weight on the right side frame rail, it didnt take long to figure out that the fast cars had hollowed out weights on the right side.
     
  22. dana barlow
    Joined: May 30, 2006
    Posts: 3,768

    dana barlow
    Member
    from Miami Fla.
    1. Y-blocks

    Real cheating,is not winning !,as in the rules said you can't do"THIS".
    But if the rule dosen't say and others don't know about things that make speed and you do=That's a fair win !
    I've come up with some speed ideas that worked well,an after some time passed,they even had rules made to outlaw them.
    Many but for ovals ,here is one small trick;"Must have have stopping power all 4 wheels"/ So with a locked rearend,I only run a brake on inside rear=can skid both rear wheels. = less lbs. an axle play helped keep right rear hooked to track coming in hard.
    Later they reworded to: "Must have working brakes on all 4" So I had to replace right rear backing plate with shoes an working cly,so it all could be seen working when drum was off.///I had a lock between shoes so they only moved out enough to see them move for tech. How ever the drum that they would always make me take off and sit aside,was really a alum cake pan painted BBQ black=so very very lite. Yes I had 4 wheel working brakes that could slide all 4 wheels in the dirt in tech and all 4 got fuild and PSI. After 2 years of that ,one nite I was the last car in tech, an guy doing tech tryed to help me put my racer back together too go home after all had been called AOK ! Well he tryed too pick up my brake drum and nearly fell backword thinking it was going to be a few lbs. LOL{ Yes the next week they reworded the rules again !LOL
     
    Last edited: Nov 2, 2018
    Dick Stevens likes this.
  23. GearheadsQCE
    Joined: Mar 23, 2011
    Posts: 2,381

    GearheadsQCE
    Member

    I designed and help build a 'Thunder Mod'. This was a class that never materialized. It was supposed to be the same as an IMCA Modified but with 10" slicks, Wing and Quickchanges allowed.

    When it was finished we took it to a local track for testing. Before we unloaded, the other racers went to the promoter and said if we were allowed to run they were all going home.:D

    After they calmed down, we were allowed to test. We were REALLY FAST. The next week we took off the aforementioned pieces and still sent them packing. That car was completely legal but every rule in the book was bent and stretched to the max. There was no minimum weight and everyone else was about 2100 lbs. We were @ 1600. The next year all the cars looked like ours.
     
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  24. bigboy308
    Joined: Feb 7, 2007
    Posts: 130

    bigboy308
    Member
    from Merlin, OR

    Rumor has it that Foyt had nitrous at Daytona also----Tech inspectors tore the damn car apart couldn't find any tank. The Rollbar had been built to be the nitrous tank!!!
     
  25. Gman0046
    Joined: Jul 24, 2005
    Posts: 5,976

    Gman0046
    Member

    bigboy 308, your rumor sounds like Bull Shit to me.. Were the Tech Inspectors also dumb and incompetent enough when tearing the car apart not to see the carburetor nitrous connection? Or was the carburetor mounted on the roll bar? Don't believe it for one minute. Sorry its pure Bull Shit. Want to buy some waterfront property in Arizona?

    Gary
     
    Last edited: Nov 1, 2018
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  26. bigboy308
    Joined: Feb 7, 2007
    Posts: 130

    bigboy308
    Member
    from Merlin, OR

    I recall Penske showing up at Riverside (average temp over 100 degrees!) with a fuel filling tank that had cooling coils around it, lowereing the temp of the gas coming out. Story was that they could get about 23 and a half gallons of cold fuel into a 22 gallon tank.

    Penske also when running the AMC cars had them "homologated" with 3-bolt wheels--- 40% faster wheel changes than a 5-bolt wheel change. SCCA put a stop to that idea for safety reasons.
     
  27. Gman0046
    Joined: Jul 24, 2005
    Posts: 5,976

    Gman0046
    Member

    What does that have to do with your BS nitrous claim against A.J. Foyt? Please tell us. Did Penske do anything against the rules? Please explain that as well.
    The title of this thread is "Good Cheating Stories" not Bull Shit rumors. Most HAMBers are astute enough to see through posts with no facts to back them up.
    Gary
     
    Last edited: Nov 1, 2018
  28. Funny statement bout waterfront property Gary, but when I lived in AZ I could walk right off my front lawn into the Colorado River
     
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  29. bigboy308
    Joined: Feb 7, 2007
    Posts: 130

    bigboy308
    Member
    from Merlin, OR

    NASCAR used to have a 4" block that every car had to drive over w/o touching--during Tech. Crews would jack up their cars to clear, hit each shock with the CO2 extinguisher and clear the block. Race time, tha car would be 2" lower.
     
  30. seb fontana
    Joined: Sep 1, 2005
    Posts: 6,317

    seb fontana
    Member
    from ct

    I would think the opposite...
     

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