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Dumb Sh!* that almost killed us

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by deto, Nov 11, 2010.

  1. deto
    Joined: Jun 26, 2010
    Posts: 2,621


    This was prompted by a post on a 3/8" socket swivel adapter used as a steering joint. How many of us are lucky to be alive when we look back at all the terrible decisions we made cuz we had to have our car running by the weekend when we were young?

    Here's my story:

    My first car was a truck; 71 longbed GMC. It had a built 350 that was poorly tuned making about 340 hp, a turbo 400 with a whiplash shift kit, and I drove it like an asshole.

    When i saved my money to put drop spindles on it, I was short a cotter pin when putting it back together. I though "What the hell do I need it for? There is no way that little thing is neccesary."

    After multiple 100 plus mph blasts down our local freeway (and I do mean down, I needed all the grade I could get) I headed home for the night. I was driving down our main drag when the front right wheel well had some peculiar sounds coming from it, almost as if it was getting higher in that corner...

    The lower ball joint pulled out, wheel folded up in the well, truck slid on its right front frame horn then slammed into the curb while trying to stop it.

    Moral of the story? Cotter pins are always used now.

    Any one care to share?
  2. bulletproof1
    Joined: Feb 23, 2004
    Posts: 2,081

    from tulsa okla

    getting pull on a sled behind my buddys jeep....hit a telephone pole so hard my body wrapped around it and my knees hit me in the forehead....
    same friend tried to burn some brush in a storm cellar ,couldnt get it to light so we kept adding gas,,,when it got enough air to ignite it looked like the space shuttle taking off...
  3. Blown35
    Joined: May 20, 2008
    Posts: 163


    When I was ten, found my Dads stash of WWII live armour piercing Mauser shells - took one down to my "lab" in the basement - knew about center fire vs rim fire - put the shell in a vice to remove the projectile so I could measure and then lay a trail of powder to light like they did in the cartoons - couldn't quite pull the bullit out of the casing with a pliers so decided to tighten the vice just a tad more - BOOOOM!! The shell fired and the bullet went thru the floor above, the livingroom couch, the ceiling the attic and out the roof!
  4. falcongeorge
    Joined: Aug 26, 2010
    Posts: 18,512

    from BC

    When we were about 17 three of us bumper skiing behind a buddies car when he was drunk, I could see he wasnt gonna make the corner, I yelled, two of us dropped down and slid under the car on impact, the third guy didnt, cracked his head a hell of a wallop on the back bumper, cold-caulked him and split his head real nice, took 8 stitches to close him up! Buncha dumb-ass Cdn country boys, always doing stupid shit like that, it was a MIRACLE I lived long enough to vote. We used to be big on standing up on the roofs of moving cars as we drove by the local cruise spots too, called it roof surfing. YEARS later, when we were in our thirties, went to one of the old indoor car shows at the PNE, a bunch of us rode out in the back of a buddies PU. On the way home, myself and my old best bud started egging each other on, next thing you know, here we are, through downtown Port Coquitlam at 11 at night, up on the roof of Dougs PU at 45 mph. Took him a minute to realize we were up there, he just about shit himself. Now I have a kid and am old enough to be a grampa, I have mellowed a little.
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  5. falcongeorge
    Joined: Aug 26, 2010
    Posts: 18,512

    from BC

    ROFLMAO! Ooooops!
  6. pdc
    Joined: Nov 25, 2008
    Posts: 346


    Had a Hog Roast one year. A friend brought his dads camper for us to crash in. Well he parked in the field by the fence. Later that night we all thought it was a good idea to start cutting doughnuts, in the same field. Came a round a little to fast in a lifted Chevy truck and smacked the camper with the tailgate. It looked like a scene out of twister. Luckily the people sleeping inside weren't hurt, just mad cause we woke them to check on them.
    Got a bright idea that chaining a big steel water trough to a lifted truck, and have him pull me around the party would be fun. This was going good till he thought it would be fun to cut me around. The darn thing flipped over and he still pulling me. Finally came to a stop. Only to find out that his oil pressure gauge hose pulled out, and pumped oil in the floor board.
  7. hammerstien
    Joined: Sep 16, 2010
    Posts: 49


    WOW that's some shit to not mess with. Glad you survived. I'm sure you got a severe ass whooping from it all.
  8. long island vic
    Joined: Feb 26, 2002
    Posts: 2,100

    long island vic

    had a friend that owns and drives pro mods,,,,cheap assed fuckin fool rebuilding the top end and lost one cotter pin..instead of going too the hardware store he bent a nail around....his crew cheif was runnind down the track too back him when he started the burnout and the nail rollled over and hung the motor wide open...either turn left and roll the car or kill his man....luckly to retired from driving
  9. The37Kid
    Joined: Apr 30, 2004
    Posts: 21,978


    So far you are in the lead , cool story!:D
  10. Noname38
    Joined: Nov 24, 2001
    Posts: 369


    Actually temorarily used pieces of a coat hanger in ball joints untill I was able to get cotter pin. It took me a year to remember that I was using pieces of a wire hanger.
  11. Gigantor
    Joined: Jul 12, 2006
    Posts: 3,805


    These are AWESOME! My first truck was a 71 GMC longbed. Its still parked in my mom's garage for when I come home.

    Here's a recent one for you.
    Last month, I found a kid that was willing to trade me a 56 Big Window Chevy pickup for an old 70's Sears Lawnmower I had. I agreed to deliver the lawnmower and all the attachments and come back at a later date to get the truck when I could borrow a trailer.
    Well, my dad has a utility trailer that is perfect for hauling things like riding lawnmowers. When I got off work late Saturday night, I stopped by his place to hook up the trailer and sure enough the lights didn't work, both bulbs were shot. I unhooked the trailer and remembered that my dad also had those utility ramps for loading ATVs and lawnmowers into the backs of pickup trucks. I was in a rush and figured those would work just as well, I had agreed to bring the trailer by the kid's house Sunday morning and didn't want him to get a chance to come to his senses and welch on the deal.
    Bright and early Sunday morning, I fire up the tractor and get it warmed up good. I have taken the mowing deck off for the extra clearance necessary to get it on the truck. I have the ramps lined up and locked and I'm ready to go. I put the tractor in 1st gear Low and start up the ramps (see where this is going) and made it over halfway up when my weight on the back overbalanced and both me and the tractor went ass over teakettle. I landed on my back and the tractor landed on me - still running. The steering wheel was torn out from between my legs (narrowly missing the boys) and my fingers and wrist were folded totally backwards and the wind was knocked out of me. I'm laying there trapped under a very hot and still running American made lawnmower of a considerable amount of weight, doing everything in my power to get it off me. I managed to push it off to the side where my steel toed boot kept my foot from being crushed and reached up and turned the lawnmower off. I was terrified I almost had a Christopher Reeves moment and made sure I could stand and walk first thing. I hobbled over and sat there trying to catch my breath and not puke.
    Once I was able to move, I bent the tractor's steering wheel back into shape, stowed the ramps, got a pair of replacement bulbs out of the garage and made the 20 minute trip to my dad's house to fix and borrow his trailer like I should have done in the first place. I hobbled like a broken soul for weeks after that but managed to seal the deal. You'd never know that tractor fell - I guess it wasn't so bad since I was there to cushion the blow.
    My wife took this picture a couple days later - I've thought of having a copy put in the garage to remind me to take my time and do it right and use my head.
  12. Maricopa
    Joined: May 18, 2007
    Posts: 45


    Had the carb linkage come apart once driving home from work. Rigged up some wire I had in the trunk to the carb, popped the hood and wired it up so it wouldn't fly open and ran the wire into the window. Drove home running the throttle with my left hand, and shifting/steering with the right.
    I doubt I'm that co-ordinated anymore.
  13. GassersGarage
    Joined: Jul 1, 2007
    Posts: 4,867


    Was there a video taken? I thought I saw it on America's Most..........
  14. Gigantor
    Joined: Jul 12, 2006
    Posts: 3,805


    No kiddin, huh? That's what everyone says. I would be allover youtube for that. My mother in law still cracks up every time she sees me since then.
  15. ol'chevy
    Joined: Nov 1, 2005
    Posts: 1,285


    I used to do that in my go cart. Or just screw the throttle wide open. Pull the crank and jump in quick.
  16. guitar man
    Joined: Sep 13, 2010
    Posts: 210

    guitar man
    from Tulsa OK

    I mentioned this truck in the "ever pop the hood and scratch your head" thread.

    In my youth a real good friend picked up a 55 chevy cameo pickup at an estate auction for next to nothing. I went and helped him trailer it home, didn't even pop the hood open until we got it unloaded. Lo and behold there was a 421 Pontiac tripower under the hood, someone had done a great job of putting it in too.

    Anyway, this thing obviously hadn't run for years so we just had to get it running and drive it. About 11 that night we finally got it fired up, tinkered around with the carbs and timing a bit and were itching to roll. He had drank a lot more beer than I had so I got elected to drive.

    "does it have brakes? " pump pump pump. "yeah, barely, they'll pump up"

    So off we rocketed down a two lane county road in the dark. That sob would pick up speed so fast it wasn't funny. I don't know exactly how fast I was going when the headlights went out but, damn, it was pitch black out there! I stepped on the brakes, nothing.

    We hit a bump and the lights came back on just in time to see the curve and the tree. Missed the tree but didn't quite make it through the curve and wound up going through a farmer's fence and into the pasture:eek:

    I guess when you're young, you think you're indestructible :D
  17. Trencher
    Joined: Nov 27, 2009
    Posts: 88


    I used to have a Mr. Gasket street scoop on a malibu years was my daily driver as well..even in the I'm driving home after work one snowy night on the know constant speed, don't do anything screwy kinda deal...when I come upon a huge downhill so I let off the gas, but that damn linkage was all frozen like cruise control so I kinda tapped the throttle to break it loose...well it broke loose alright..I think I spun around twice before going into a 50 foot ravine..the snow blasted up as soon as I hit the edge of the road so I just held on...when I got out of the car I had slid right between to trees with trunks over 20 inches in diameter..the tire tracks were within 6 inches of each tree......whew..sometimes you have to wonder if somebody's watchin out for ya..
  18. slddnmatt
    Joined: Mar 30, 2006
    Posts: 3,641


    towing a 1960 Ford 3/4 ton crewcab home from sacramento with a 1965 Ford 1/2 ton shortbed with springs taken out of the back to ride a little smoother.... after loosing it across 4 lanes watching the trailer come all the way around and smack both sides of the truck taking a chunk out of one rim then hitting the divider. thank god nobody else his us.. bought some helper springs, a new rim and drove 45mph, white knuckling every bump and wiggle all the way home..:rolleyes:
  19. COOP
    Joined: Mar 27, 2006
    Posts: 249


    Shortly after I was married I was working on my two year old '64 Chevy convertable. It came from the factory with a 300 hp 3 speed. After shucking about three transmissions I decided to go with a four speed. I changed it in my grandmothers driveway (dirt). No matter what I did I didn't have enough beans to lift the trans high enough to get it in there. I came up with a brillient idea. I jacked the car up with a bumper jack, climbed under, set the trans on my chest, and had the wife let the jack down easy till things lined up. Told her not to let go of the handle. I was safety consious enough to put a log in back of the rear tire though to keep it from rollin' away. all finished, rolled out from under the car to find that the dog on the jack had held onto the bumper by about a 1/4 inch. Let it down however and everything wuz cool. Didn't mention this to too many people............
  20. Hmmm...where to start

    Used to manage an ice arena back East. Nights after doing maintenance, we'd sometimes put a water ski tow rope on the back of the Zamboni. Doughnuts at center ice. If whoever was sitting in the sled chair let go while zipping around. LOOK OUT!!! They were sure to eat it into the side boards.

    Used to live in Richmond, VA just off of Monument Ave. A beautiful old tree lined street and parts were still cobblestone. Late for work, freezing rain the night before, cars all around, and hauling ass down Monument. Spun a 360 in the roundabout at the base of Robert E. Lee. Holy shit was I lucky.
  21. falcongeorge
    Joined: Aug 26, 2010
    Posts: 18,512

    from BC

    Oh, oh oh! I have one along these lines! Driving my old V-8 pinto around with the same jack-ass I was roof surfing with riding shotgun. This thing had a pretty nasty 11/1 solid lifter 302 with a torker, double-pumper, 10" converter, 4.10s, in other words, it was a handful at the best of times. Those cars had a cable throttle linkage with a little ball on the end of the cable that went through a stamped steel lever at the top of the gas pedal. So we are driving around, and the end comes off the cable, no throttle. So I tell my buddy to get down under the dash, and grab the end of the cable and give me gas when I ask for it. So this system if working ok till he gets a wild hair up his ass. We are waiting to turn right onto a busy 4 lane street, and I ask him to give me some gas. Well, he cackles maniacally, YANKS the cable HARD out of the firewall while I have the front wheels turned, The throttle plates SNAP open, and we are INSTANTLY slewing sideways across three lanes, 7500 rpm, back tires BOILING like the chi-town hustler with Minick behind the wheel, full opposite lock, completely sideways, I am frantically kicking at him, yelling "LET GO, LET GO!". and he is laughing like a goddam maniac!
    Crazy SOB finally lets go, I coast over to the side of the road, he sits up, laughing so hard tears are rolling down his face and says " well, you ASKED for some gas". Crazy bastard...
  22. The lawn mower pickup thing? Had that happen to a freind of mine. He popped the clutch a little hard when the front wheels were already on the gate and the ramps shot out. It must have happen fairly slow cause I had time to give the nose of the tractor a hard shove while it was facing straight up and it landed harmlessly on its side. He shrugged it off, but now I know what would have happened.

    About the most dangerous thing I did was give an aunt and uncle a lift in my old beetle and it started pouring rain. The wipers didn't work so I wired a coat hanger to left wiper arm and worked the wipers manually, with my arm pinched in the smallest opening in the drivers window I could make, or they'd get soaked. The funniest thing about it was it worked great and my aunt and uncle had a great laugh the whole trip and for years after.
  23. hotroded
    Joined: Oct 9, 2007
    Posts: 1,586


    Back when I was in the army
    We used to have dart fights like the darts for a dart board well we had this kid timothy hall from georgia on top of the bunk bed running like a scared rat back and forth it was really funny well he got stuck in the ass with a dart.
    As I ran out of the room and down the hall to the metal fire doors this dart comes flying past me at head level and sticks in the door.
    Well all I can say is what the hell were we thinking.
    And yes I'm 45 now and would do it again in a heart beat. Got a million stories can't remember them but.
  24. Yeeeeeowwwwwww!
    I had a hard rubber ball thrown at me one day at work from guy that had a real fast pitch. It hit me right in the sack and I was hurting bigtime. When I got home, my sack was blacker than that. 3 days later my wife came home and I had my legs spread and I was scubbing my sack endlessly!!!. The blood started coming back and that black sack itched and itched and itched!! All she did was laugh. All was back to working order in a few weeks.
  25. Zombie Duck
    Joined: Oct 6, 2010
    Posts: 101

    Zombie Duck

    I never did anything stupid in my truck when I was growing up and I always made sure it was fixed right the first time.

    When you're the one that has to pay for parts to fix your car and pay for your own insurance and do all the labor on your own free time you're a lot more careful. Besides it was 2 hour walk to work and school without.

    My cousin on the other hand rolled his truck doing donuts.:D
  26. partsdawg
    Joined: Feb 12, 2006
    Posts: 1,655

    from Minnesota

    I used to black out when I was in my serious drinking years.Loved Wild Turkey or Stingers.Once "woke up" driving in the left lane with traffic whizzing by me on the wrong side.Numerous mornings of waking up miles from home in a ditch or someones driveway I didnt know.Went to visit some friends 40 miles from my favorite bar after 10 Stingers and woke up the next morning naked in a bathtub.My buddies wife handed me my clothes and said I just walked in,stripped down as I walked by them and went to sleep in the tub.My buddy asked me if I remembered the drive to the farm.Nope.He asked if I wanted to see my '63 Riviera so we walked out the door and there it sat.Every panel was dented,windshield gone and roof smashed down behind the front seat.No clue where or how I rolled it.
    That was 1981 and I didnt drink again until last year.I can now nurse 1 beer till it's warm to be social.Lesson learned.
  27. I must have bad luck with throttle cables too .... Model A roadster with tunnel rammed sbc broke a cable so drove it home (about 30 miles) with my buddy standing up leaning over the screen working the throttle on the rear carb .

    Another time a buddie had bought a early XJ6 jag ( we were going to take it home to strip for IRS/IFS for his pickup project) and throttle cable broke 2 blocks from home . I sat on the front fender leaning in with my left hand to work the throttle while yelling at him to go left or go right because the Jag had a reverse opening hood - he couldn't see where to go !

    Last edited: Dec 15, 2010
  28. pdq67
    Joined: Feb 12, 2007
    Posts: 787


    He, He!!

    2" finishing nails make great B-J cotter keys.

    The last high speed trip I made up to my Mom's place to get tuition money because the summer railroad job paid a week late and the late fee was like $25 that we didn't have. (Back in '73 or so)...

    I left the bunk car after dark, kicked on my 200,000 candle power spot driving lights and down the gravel road I went at like 70 mph.

    I knew there was a river around somewhere but since I could spot a barn over on a hill like 2 miles away, I figured there was a bridge so full steam ahead.

    long story short, no bridge and three donuts later, car dead sitting at the "T" with the river bank just off the side of the ditch.

    It took me about 5 minutes to settle down before I cranked my '67 SS/RS up and continued to Mom's And at a lot slower speed. I got back to the RR tracks at like 3 AM fine to get a bit of sleep before hitting the traveling tie gang at 7 AM!!
  29. I had to quit reading this post !! My cheeks hurt from laughing so hard
  30. AAFD
    Joined: Apr 13, 2010
    Posts: 585

    from US of A

    A friend and I were doing some last minute tuning on his car at his place before the drag races. My car was down with transmission problems so I was helping him get prepped. Since we were so late, he wanted to pull in, pass tech, toss me out the door and hit the staging lanes, and not even pit until he had a few runs in with the new tune. So we ditched everything in the car, back seat, jack, spare, random shit in the trunk. We even took the exhaust out and ran open headers. He figured if he bolted on his slicks and front skinnies now, he wouldn't have to do it at the track with a fourway, instead we could do it faster with the impact. We slapped them on, and the slicks had 12psi in them. I said "hey man, lets add air and we can let it out when we get there, then stop at the gas station to air them back up on the way home" Well...that was the plan, but we forgot to add air during our frenzy to get to the track. We got moving a few miles from his place and he said "these slicks are making the ass end go everywhere, screw it" (Keep in mind these are soft & sticky modern drag slicks, not drag radials or stiff old bias ply tires) We kept trucking and came to a set of railroad tracks on the top of a hill on a curve. The speed limit over the tracks was 20mph...we hit it doing about 50. The cars weight transferred after we came over the top of the hill and made the bead roll off the drivers side wheel and we went spinning around, screaming and cussing. Luckily we didn't hit anything and the wheel and tire were both fine with only some scraping since the asphalt was very smooth. We limped the car off to the side of the road and there was a used tire shop about 20 feet away so we pulled in there, they jacked up the car, blasted air into the stem and popped the bead back on. They aired up both tires to 30psi and told us "Have a good time at the races, and thanks for the entertainment" as they chuckled. We had a great day of racing. The next raceday, we all rode on our street tires and put the slicks on at the track. My friend also screwed his slicks to his wheels.
    Last edited: Nov 12, 2010

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