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Death traps.

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by stainlesssteelrat, Feb 8, 2011.

  1. stainlesssteelrat
    Joined: Nov 23, 2010
    Posts: 583

    from ms

    This is a thread for the scary, the horrible and the abominations that you
    have, seen, owned, or rode in.

    pics and storys. and such.

    here is my story.

    my father and i where helping out a friend and driving a car one of his friends
    bought from a shop from another shop that was closer to them, i was happy as hell to ride along seeing as it was one of my dream cars (67 shelby GT500), that is.. till i saw the car.. but guts won over brains for both my
    dad and i, see.. the car was whole..except for the panneled over missing chunks of rusted out frame and body.. the car flexed in the middle
    when you got in..
    but we STILL got in.. and low and behold.. it ran.. and smoked.. but it ran!.
    hahah, and my dad kicked her to life and we drove out the parking lot with the whole damn car bouncing and flexing and scareing the CRAP out of both
    of us, we somehow survived driving that rolling heap of rust and patches
    to the friends, friends shop.. boy.. they just LOVED the car(sarcasem)..
    it was bought site unseen.. didn't bother me and my dad, we where
    just happy to be out of it and on solid ground.
    Joined: Aug 22, 2009
    Posts: 2,601


    Heck all of my cars..
  3. newsomtravis
    Joined: Jun 1, 2009
    Posts: 562

    from pville, ca

    brought home a few projects like that, well,
  4. Lone Star Mopar
    Joined: Nov 2, 2005
    Posts: 3,070

    Lone Star Mopar

    Im trying to forget about em

  5. Muttley
    Joined: Nov 30, 2003
    Posts: 18,449


    I found these pictures in an ebay ad yesterday:



  6. SIX_94Y
    Joined: Apr 14, 2008
    Posts: 96

    from Australia

    I risk offending someone here as the car looked hamb acceptable but a few years back while in the states, seen a coupe with a four link running 1"x1" square tube with bolts through it as bushes, all the bolts were misaligned not pulling tight flat on their faces and was driven into the show where i seen it!
  7. zapp69
    Joined: Sep 30, 2007
    Posts: 342


    We picked up an old Torana (Aussie Car) for free, no motor, Gearbag or seats but otherwise pretty complete, annyway we had no trailer, no Money but a shitty old Wagon so the plan was tie the Torrie to the rear of the wagon with a tire for cushioning, next a mate sits on a Milk crate hanging onto the steering wheel that wasnt fastened to the dash anymore and another in the back of the wagon manning the rope where we had tied a slip know so we could set it free if anything went wrong....well it did

    We took all the back roads through the middle of town when we stopped at an intersection of a very steep hill facing downhill, the Driver spotted a Cop so he floored it and the slipknot gave way. As the rope flew out the back it tangled around my mates foot, I jumped the seat and got him free.
    Well the Torrie was off down the Hill we watched in Horror as the Brakes we thought were OK (not good but OK) failed, from then on the Steerer fell from the Milk Crate, but managed to keep hold of the wheel and regain his composure and swin hard right into a car park doing a 180 so he as headed back uphill.

    Well seems the car had no rear shocks and started bouncing with both right wheels coming off the ground that is when the axles which were not bolted in decided to depart company. It rolled to a stop with 1 axle half out and the other about 10inches out.

    No-one hurt and the car lived on to become a forestry hack (they use to keep good roads that were awesome fun on the weekends, plenty of Driver training done but thats another story)
    I guess you had to be there!!!!!
  8. johnybsic
    Joined: Oct 8, 2009
    Posts: 612

    from las vegas

    GOD!! That poor cheby :(
    "Ima make me a gassa' sell it fo' a butt load"

    I had my buddy help my do brakes on my 73' Nova in highschool. Got on the freeway..."Thud thud thud" WTF?!? pull over, tires leaning the lugnuts were 1-2 threds on :eek:.

  9. hammer bowling
    Joined: Apr 1, 2010
    Posts: 90

    hammer bowling

    I thought I had seen everything but YIKES!!!!
  10. Smokin' Joe
    Joined: Jul 4, 2006
    Posts: 1,000

    Smokin' Joe
    Member Emeritus

    I hate to admit it, but at 17 years of age, I really was an idiot.
    I had just gotten the engine and trans installed into a '55 Chevy 2 dr. sedan that I had only owned for about a month. When I got it there was no engine, trans or front seat in it. When we got it running, my brother in law and I took it on a test drive with no front seat. We took 2 crates and put them on the floorboard and pulled out of the driveway. After about a half mile of driving it pretty easy, I wanted to kick it one time to see what she'd do but I forgot that the acceleration factor will indeed over-ride the steering-wheel-grip strength. Thank God when the milk crate and I went over backwards, my foot was also lifted from the loud pedal or there would've been trouble!
    See, I told you I was an idiot back then...39 short years ago.
  11. GlenC
    Joined: Mar 21, 2007
    Posts: 757


    One of my daily driving 'hacks' was a mid 50's English Hillman Minx fordor sedan. I bought it cheap as there was a bit of rust running down the outside of the front guard, where it meets the door pillar. I bogged up the rust, got it registered, and drove the wheels off it. I fitted a bigger, hotter Hillman Superminx engine, extractors, wide wheels, bogged up the rust again, and kept driving it. Each time the rust broke out I'd just slap in more bog and paint over it...

    Until the passenger front door started opening when I went round corners...

    The Hillman is unibody, and part of the main structure is the pillar (now rotted right out and 100% bog) that runs up between the end of the front guard and the door frame. I almost lost my girlfriend out the door one day, so I finally figured I should get rid of it.

    Cheers, Glen.
  12. bonez
    Joined: Jul 16, 2007
    Posts: 3,492

    from Slow lane

  13. jetnow1
    Joined: Jan 30, 2008
    Posts: 1,777

    from CT
    1. A-D Truckers

    In 1972 a buddy picked up a 68 mustang w/ a 390/4 speed in it- cheap as the gas
    crisis made everyone want small engines. We spent the summer racing it and generally abusing it- went thru 3 390 motors in 3 months but did not care as we bought good running ones to swap in for $50 or less. We decided to get serious
    with the car- fixed the body, painted it, picked up a 428 from a police wreck, rebuilt
    the 428 to cobra Jet specs, went to swap it in, took out the latest 390, .....
    the subframe by the dteering box was almost cracked half way thru- who knows for
    how long. We did wonder why the shifter sometimes seem to hang up- Jim
  14. CutawayAl
    Joined: Aug 3, 2009
    Posts: 2,144

    from MI

    - I got a ride in a restored '50s Allard powered by a modified Olds V-8. The car had swing axle front suspension and transverse buggy spring rear suspension. It was fairly fast, but was twitchy, cornered like a Conestoga wagon, and couldn't be kept in one lane at speed. It was scary. I was telling an old racer friend about it. He said the cars were dangerous and he personally knew someone who was killed in one.

    - A friend's T-Bucket kit powered by SB Chevy. Transverse Model T spring suspension front & rear. Huge rear tires. Spoked front wheels with cycle tires. I was pretty much the automotive equivalent of a '60s Harley chopper.

    - Early '70s Manic GT fiberglass kit car. It was a light car with a rear mounted heavy cast iron 4-cylinder hanging behind the rear wheels. Rear weight bias was so high the car was genuinely dangerous to drive.

    - Years ago I built a first generation Mini Cooper powered by a V-8 driving the rear wheels. With huge rear tires and normal sized fronts, it was a pro-street before there was pro-street. The car was fast, but high power, 80" wheelbase, locked diff and inadequate rear suspension made the car unpredictable, and dangerous when pushed. Knowing I was eventually going to hurt myself and/or someone else in that car I ended up keeping most of the parts and some of the body panels, and cut up the rest and scrapped it. At times I have thought about doing it again, only better this time. But the fact is, it was a bad idea to start with, and still is.

    - I once bought a 390 powered '51 ford truck. The only thing holding the two frame rails together was the half of the front cross member not cut away, and the small rear cross member. The cobbled in trans cross member was doing essentially nothing. With all that frame twist the truck looked like a '60s gasser coming out of the hole. I found a junk truck with a good frame.
    Last edited: Feb 8, 2011
  15. Francisco Plumbero
    Joined: May 6, 2010
    Posts: 2,531

    Francisco Plumbero
    from il.

    This will be fine, as long as this guys tractor goes real slow when he disengages the tiller and makes the next pass he should get many seasons of planting out of this farm implement.:D
  16. Why hell mutt that mus be one a dem gassers. :eek:

    I had a Johnny Cash C-10 once it was a '62, '63, '66. Small block 301 balanced and blue printed, 4 gear out of a ton, 3/4 ton rear springs, 12 bolt posi. The front sheet metal was from a '63, the cab a '62 the chassis and bed '66. The front suspension was a combo of '62 and '66 parts. A Little something that everyone should know, if you use '62 Idlers with '66 cross link A arms and spindles you can turn the front wheels far enough to roll the tire off the rim. But it was pretty cool on a dirt road, you could turn the wheels to lock and nail it it would stay in one place and spin circles.

    The fenders were a bit floppy and the pass door had a nasty habit of flying open when you least expected it. We had a bungee cord that we hooked to it and under the dash.

    One night late I picked this hippie lookin fella hitch hikin'. I was flyin low and evidently had one head light out. I hadn't noticed, he thought I was a motor cycle. I saw him slammed the brakes on and the bungy cord snapped when the door flew open. He looked at me real carefully then jumped in.

    We made it about 7 or 8 miles (about 5 minutes) down this twisty country road before the door flew open on him. I had warned him but he was leaning against it. I reached over and grabbed him, he very politely asked me if he could get out. So I slammed on the brakes, the door was already open. He jumped out, I wiped the seat off with an old rag and tied what was left of the bungy cord in a knot and headed for the next watering hole. Got there just in time for last call.

    Damn those were the good ol' days. :D:D:D

    Last edited: Feb 8, 2011
  17. seb fontana
    Joined: Sep 1, 2005
    Posts: 6,921

    seb fontana
    from ct

    Latest issue of Good Guys or Street Rodder...Picture of a "bobber" [caption words, not mine] that the spring pad welds failed allowing the rear axle housing to spin around in the u-bolts and punch a hole in the fuel cell that was mounted behind the rear end..This happened while braking!! I shudder to even think of the rest of the welds...
  18. Chevy55
    Joined: Nov 6, 2008
    Posts: 409

    from Nebraska

    Hey I just checked out the ebay ad for that 55 Chevy and it is set up for a big block so hopefully it will compress those springs a little bit and make it steer better. Actually the rest of the car isnt much better than the front end. Hopefully no one will sucker on this thing.
  19. dave s
    Joined: Aug 2, 2005
    Posts: 354

    dave s

    I hate to admit it, but the first car i built was an unsafe pile of crap.... the first "test drive" ended in the gas tank mount snapping at the weld and the tank scraping down the road... sparks and everything.

    the next week i enrolled at the local community college in the welding program...

    needless to say, that "car" was put out back and used for parts. ha ha i sure learned from that one...
  20. Skeezix
    Joined: Jan 10, 2007
    Posts: 845

    from SoCal

    Old house mate has a 68 Camero with NOs, no fire suppression and hardware store quality rod ends on a four link. This Bondo bucket actually popoed the rear window when accelerating.
    At least he has a roll bar that sits in place (not even bolted) so it looks cool.
  21. Zombie Duck
    Joined: Oct 6, 2010
    Posts: 101

    Zombie Duck

    My 3rd hand unfinished 3100 project, I'm glad I didn't try to get it to run before I looked it over real good after I got it home. The guy I bought it off of bought it sight unseen and sold it to me for a loss and I could see why.

    All the cross members were cut out of the front of the frame with a blow torch and the firewall was cut out and replaced with sheet metal from an old welding machine to make room for a 350/350 set up.

    The home made motor mounts looked scary and when I removed the trans from the home made cross member it was sitting on, I found that the they just cut a slit in the cross member for it to bolt to. That and they just cut large jagged holes in the frame with a torch for the cross member to bolt on to, the only thing keeping it in place were large washers on the bolts.:eek:

    They wanted disc brakes on the front but I guess the kit was too much money so they cut the old spindles off and welded new ones with disc brakes already on them.

    The front tires are slanted but you couldn't tell until I put more than 1 lug nut on them and aired them up. The scary thing is almost everything was hooked up and ready to go, so some rednecks/kids/rat rodders almost bit the bullet.

    P.S. No offense to rednecks or kids.
  22. hugh m
    Joined: Jul 18, 2007
    Posts: 2,143

    hugh m
    from ct.

    Similar story with my buddie's 289 powered Triumph nose, loose seats, and a wire from the carb to a hand held wrench for a gas pedal. When Bobby got on it , it was floored, and left fat and skinny chirps down Bedford Road, with our feet in the air. Blew the rear soon after.
  23. this thing comes to mind....found this pic on the HAMB a while back! THIS GUY HAS BALLS!!!

    Attached Files:


    Not for long!!
  25. perhaps but if he hits a bump very hard he won't have ass. :eek:

    I guess that's why the NHRA made a rule book. ;)

    Me and a Kid named Helms did a suicide front end on a T when I was in highschool. Not a thing in the world wrong with the welds but you should never build anything out of bed rails. We made it about a block before we found out they they called it a suicide front end.

    I'll bet if I think hard enough I could come up with endless stories of stupid chit that I have done or know someone else that did it first so I didn't have to.
    Last edited: Feb 8, 2011
  26. jdj9410
    Joined: Sep 4, 2007
    Posts: 324

    from Paris TX

    Might lose his ass going over a bump. But at least won't lose part of his foot in a clutch explosion.

  27. traffic61
    Joined: Jun 15, 2009
    Posts: 1,506

    from Owasso, OK

    Neighbor kid with a '63 C-10 decided to relocate the gas tank to the bed of his truck. I think he used an old Chevelle tank if I remember correctly. Whilst doing a doughnut in the local Wal Mart parking lot, he discovered that simple plumbers strap does not make a good gas tank retaining strap. After a few spins, the tank launched out of the bed (no taligate) and skipped across the parking lot to onlookers amazement and amusement. I got there just after it happened as he was loading the tank back in the bed and tightening the hose clamps to limp it home. Dang, I would have liked to have seent that.
  28. Bar hopping tales... they were fun. My bro had his beloved 1-ton GMC detonate a center hanger bearing on the drive shaft while coming home from the bar. Beat the crap out of the underside of the truck and ripped out all the wiring running to the back of the truck... forget who did the road call to get him home... not easily fixable at 2 AM with no parts and tools on hand.

  29. Mine used to jump out of the bracket once in awhile. My little brother finally made some shims to put in there out of an old hacksaw blade and that cured it.

    The dumb stuff we used to do to save a dime.

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