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Hot Rods Car words you learned from your dad or others.

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by Toqwik, Apr 2, 2020.

  1. gigem
    Joined: Dec 31, 2005
    Posts: 71


    Some of my dad's favorites...

    I can teach it to you, but I can't learn it for you

    You can't polish a turd

    You could fuck up a stainless steel stick

    Useless as tits on a bull elephant

    Slicker than owl shit

    I'll thing of more I'm sure....

    Sent from my SM-G975U using Tapatalk
    chryslerfan55 and Nicholas Coe like this.
  2. Dad said " foot feed". Good thread.

    chryslerfan55 and jimmy six like this.
  3. Hurry ever chance you get.
    Take your time going but hurry back.

    From Art Maddox, my boss when I was 17=18.
    Some of you probably know him.

    jimmy six and loudbang like this.
  4. oldsfrench
    Joined: Jan 26, 2018
    Posts: 243

    from France

    Yes good thread
    Again I have to say sorry for my poor language hope you understand what I mean
    When I was very young, I helped a friend who ad a shop
    Just doing easy work
    Exhaust things and breaks maintenance
    Here we go :
    When I was under the car
    Sometimes the wrench fool off my hands
    My friend said :
    Why are you throwing this tool to the ground ?
    It is brand new
  5. woodbutcher
    Joined: Apr 25, 2012
    Posts: 3,286


    :D Also"Colder than a tax collectors heart".
    Good luck.Have fun.Be safe.
    chryslerfan55, loudbang and jimmy six like this.
  6. Cosmo49
    Joined: Jan 15, 2007
    Posts: 1,332


    I cut it twice and it's still too short!
    Boneyard51 and loudbang like this.
  7. Terrible80
    Joined: Oct 1, 2010
    Posts: 783


    Shine the light where I'm working -----not in my eyes. Never knew why we had to lay on the ground in freezing wheater in the dark every time he'd go on a trip.

    Sent from my LG-TP450 using The H.A.M.B. mobile app
  8. hotrodjack33
    Joined: Aug 19, 2019
    Posts: 3,479


    From my Father-in-law: his comment to you for any physical "incident" (drop a wrench, fall off a ladder, break a glass, etc.) was "what a clobber-ass"
    chryslerfan55, Baumi and loudbang like this.
  9. bowie
    Joined: Jul 27, 2011
    Posts: 2,874


    My dad used to say, about a certain mechanical engineer " he's so worried about the bugs nuts, he wouldn't notice when it's head falls off! "
    loudbang likes this.
  10. bowie
    Joined: Jul 27, 2011
    Posts: 2,874


    Another one Dad would use "that guy is crazier than a shit house rat!"
  11. slowmotion
    Joined: Nov 21, 2011
    Posts: 3,309


    "Tighter than the nuts on a Packard"
    Could be a frozen fastener, or a frugal acquaintance...:D
    loudbang likes this.
  12. One from the old welding shop manager: We can fix anything from the crack of dawn to a broken heart.

    One from an engineer that I worked with: Fits like a di** in a shirtsleeve.
    RusTnut, chryslerfan55 and loudbang like this.
  13. lonejacklarry
    Joined: Sep 11, 2013
    Posts: 1,464


    An old radiator repairman (remember those?) I knew used to say he could weld a Hershey bar to a snowball. I never did see him do it but I always thought he really could.
    Last edited: Apr 6, 2020
  14. X-cpe
    Joined: Mar 9, 2018
    Posts: 1,404


    For ineptitude or general clumsiness, "Looks like a monkey F-ing a football."
  15. D type
    Joined: Jul 16, 2010
    Posts: 202

    D type

    Had an old friend that I respected very much and he taught me
    a lot He always used to say
    You cant polish a turd but you can roll it in glitter
  16. My dad's favorite saying every time he saw one of my new projects: 'Not again....'
  17. SkimmerBob
    Joined: Apr 3, 2011
    Posts: 6


    One buddy's dad would always ask me of my car "How many died in that wreak?"
    The other buddy's dad would say "You didn't have time to do it right , but you had time to do it over!"
    loudbang likes this.
  18. v8flat44
    Joined: Nov 13, 2017
    Posts: 980


    That thing couldn't pull a greased cat outta bed.
    He bought a Caddilac once & the first thing he said when he brought it home was: "what a p o s, my old Packard had more top end, what a p o s !!!!
    loudbang and Nicholas Coe like this.
  19. Uribe
    Joined: Jan 27, 2019
    Posts: 64


    My dad calls a ford siloniod, "el monito". Witch means little doll in spanish. Why i dont know.
    loudbang and Nicholas Coe like this.
  20. UNSHINED 2
    Joined: Oct 30, 2006
    Posts: 1,120


    Journeymans to his apprentice when its time for a couple drops of oil.....

    ---it just needs a couple drops of weiner-slider
    ---now it just needs a bit of Maidens oil
    loudbang likes this.
  21. UNSHINED 2
    Joined: Oct 30, 2006
    Posts: 1,120


    Greez instead of grease
    Unique Rustorations and loudbang like this.
  22. Auburn Boattail Speedster 851/852 and Cord 810 / 812 Phaeton, kept me going from 11 to 78 yrs old. Words that got a run for their money.
    chryslerfan55 and loudbang like this.
  23. Reman
    Joined: Jul 8, 2010
    Posts: 361

    from Florida

    This has been quite the entertaining read. I have laughed out loud a few times in reading through them all. Through the years I have heard most of them, but a few were new to me.
    Unfortunately, I never had an opportunity to work with my dad, since he passed when I was only 9 years old. I have picked up a couple through from others I have worked with, that I have not see already stated here :
    That boy is slower than smoke off of shit. (Often in reference to me, lol)
    This shop is so cold it would freeze the balls off a brass monkey.
    You could sling a cat through the cracks in this wall.
    Don't know his elbow from his asshole.
    She got her tits in the wringer.
    She came in today with the broomstick up her ass. ( Heard that one often, at one particular shop.)
  24. Mitchell Rish
    Joined: Jun 10, 2007
    Posts: 1,429

    Mitchell Rish
    from Houston MS

    I guess the one that always got pinned to me - still does at times would be- Thats A Kill Yourself Quick Kit. I had a bad habit( still do ) of building a race car as a street car.
    I will steal a line from a movie that came out in the late 80s or early 90s ( Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man) Better to be Dead and Cool- than Alive and UnCool. Bad advice but it sounded good at the time.
  25. BoogittyShoe
    Joined: Feb 18, 2020
    Posts: 330


    Never heard this except from my dad.
    *stopping at gas station*
    "I gotta drain my radiator."
    *gets out and goes to restroom*
    Boneyard51 and loudbang like this.
  26. 6sally6
    Joined: Feb 16, 2014
    Posts: 1,894


    Dag-nab-it.........JOHN BROWN..........Con-sarnd-ed.....That thang is runn'in richer than 3 foot up a bull's ass!
    She was so bow legged she couldn't hem-a-hog-in-a-ditch!
    If it ran good it run slicker'n snot.
    My grand pa once hit his finger with the hammer and yelled...."dog bite a ni--er baby!"
    Something was "screwed up as a box of ass holes"!
    Something was "hotter'n the hinges to the gates of hell"!
    Something was messed up "six ways to Sunday!"
    Tighter'n Dick's hat band!
    Colder'n a well diggers ass!
    When he got mad "it makes my ass crave stove wood"!
    So scared "you couldn't drive a hat pin up my ass with a sledgehammer!"
    "Shak'in like a dog shitt'in peach seeds!"
    Just to name a few.
    Sure miss him.I'd empty my bank account .....for 15 minutes with him now!
    Last edited: May 2, 2020
  27. How about hotter than a popcorn fart, and richer than a stick 6 foot up a bulls butt
    loudbang likes this.
  28. 2bubbas
    Joined: Mar 19, 2011
    Posts: 679


    Always called someone he thought a fool- Numb Nuts!
  29. brokedownbiker
    Joined: Jun 7, 2016
    Posts: 621


    Most of the words I learned from my Navy vet, biker Dad were on George Carlin's 7 Words You Can't Say On TV list. Actually Dad's vocabulary was a lot longer than 7 words! Lol
    Nicholas Coe likes this.
  30. 48ford
    Joined: Dec 15, 2001
    Posts: 450


    When the job was going bad and time was tight he would Yelp at the car
    Why you Ethiopian S.O.B!,
    Boneyard51 likes this.

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