everyone screws up once in a while...

Now I know there are some top notch tin knockers on this forum. and probably more engine building knowledge/power secrets than any other public forum. some of the finest craftsmanship ive ever seen has been on this site...

but we all screw up once in a while.

I am not a top notch anything by any strech of the imagination but I can keep my junk going and lookin decent... so ill start

I was 15 and we had the 53 ford jubilee tractor down for a top end rebuild. when i got home from school. there was a note on the counter that said to go ahead and put the head back on the short block and start to button it up and that dad was going to be late.
I was exstatic that i was trusted with this by myself so I rushed down to the garage and got started. i wiped off the block deck and placed the gasket sat everything down and started torquing bolts as per the book.

pushrods, rockers , valve cover...

till i went to install the intake and the rag i had used to wipe of the deck was under the head... just the corner of it less than 1/2 the size of a postage stamp. that was just about the time the ol man walked in the door...

later that summer dad was freshening up the 283 in the 67 k10. had it on the stand. installed the intake torqued it down put the rockers on and went to drop in the push rods and the first dropped almost out of sight. as he looked over at the lifters lined up on the edge of the work bench.

cmon, there is way too much garage time spent on here for there not to be some funny bonehead moments.

 

Got my 352 ford engine bottom end together, put the oil pump on, the pan on and then got the top end together and was going to set the distributor in and looked down in the hole and, woops. Forgot the oil pump driveshaft. So back over the engine goes, have to pull the pan and pull the oil pump and put the driveshaft in. Not a fun thing to do.

 

When I was a kid(13 or 14 Y/O)my best friends father was a farmer & told us to change the oil in old the hay truck that I learned to drive in(a 39 International I think).Anyway his father came out to check on our progress and you guessed it.We had drained the transmission.He was not happy and not so politely"asked" me to leave which I did on the run.

 

Recently assembled a BBC and had the oil pump off three times getting the windage tray right so it would clear the pan. Put the heads on and relized the oil pump drive does not go in from the top. Most recent but certainly not the best.

 

"everyone screws up once in a while"...just told my boss that last Saturday , i won't go into the details

your lifter story reminds me of a Sunday morning when i was working on a 350 chevy crate motor while i was REALLY hung over..i was probably still buzzed. new crate goodwrench motor that the owner wanted a new Comp Cam and lifters installed before the motor went in the car..and wanted to help. had it torn down to get to it. i started pulling the lifters and placing them on a shop towel on the bench as we were talking and not paying real close attention. this was going on for about 5 minutes until i realized i wasn't getting anywhere , i then said "there sure are a lot of lifters in this"

my helper was putting new lifters in as i was pulling the old ones out..on the old cam

 

Can I tell on someone else? I work at a machine shop where Ronny Racer (there is a bunch of them!) gets his blocks done. He gets it home and puts it all back together. Comes back in a week later complaining that it smokes real bad and that we f'd up. He goes on to say that he tried one of the duramax restore products in the oil. Hmmm.

 

several years ago I was doing an intake swap on my old hot rod pick up. I had placed a couple of shop rags in the lifter valley while I cleaned off the old gasket. I placed the new intake, bolted and torqued everything down and tried to stab the dist. but it wouldn't go. I looked down the dist. hole and found that I left the shop rags in the lifter valley. Last time I made that mistake.....

 

Oh man....this could be intersting!! I won't go back to when I was younger and didn't know better!!! One I think about all the time....kind of a bad nightmare when I am awake!! I had put a small block together for a friend, to run in a model a roadster. He wanted to run a 3 or 6 duece set up but did not have one at the time I was putting the engine together. I put the engine in his roadster without an intake while he looked for one. He found a couple, but could not afford them at the time, so we decided we would put a single 4 on it and switch the intake once he found one. Well...I am buttoning up the motor, got the intake gaskets set down, just finishing the permatex sealer in the corners and the phone rings...get off the phone, grab the intake, set it in place, tighten it down and continue on finishing the motor. I get it running, got everything adjusted, no problems.

Well, the buddy calls me up, like two years later, and he finally bought an old edelbrock intake with three rochester carbs on it and he wants me to rebuild the carbs, put it on and tune it for him. So I say sure, bring it down and I'll go through the carbs, when I am done I'll call and you can drive the roadster down and I'll put it on, tune it, and ya can drive home.

Ok, I got the carbs all rebuilt and call him up...he drives down and we start shootin the shit and I'm pulling the intake off... I'm on one side, he is on the other, I lift the intake up and start to back away with it when he says "WTF, what is that doing in there!?" I kind of look back at him and say what? He reaches in and picks up a patially used tube of black permatex!!! I was like...damn, that is where that went!!!! Kind of laughing as I turn red as hell!!! Seems like when the phone rang I laid it down, answered the phone, forgot about the permatex, and put the intake on. Don't ask me why or how I did it, but I did. Needless to say, I think about if ocassionally, but I am always reminded of it when him and I get together to shoot the shit!!!

 

Back in the late 60's, I worked part time at a Ford dealer after school. The main mechanic had done a valve job on a cab over grain truck, and I was putting the heads back on. When we started it, it made a knocking noise. We shut it down quickly, and the mechanic pulled the intake and one head...there was a 3/4" flat washer folded neatly in half. Luckily, it do any damage.

 

A real quick thrash to put a new pair of Edelbrock aluminum heads on my Plymouth's 360, had to be across the state later that day, ya know... Buttoning down the valve covers with a shorty ratchet, the last thing to do is put the right exhaust manifold on. What happens next? I turn around to answer a question, bang my head on a hood hinge, and in a 1 in a million shot - drop the shorty ratchet at precisely the right angle so that it drops into the open 2 1/2" head pipe below! But wait there's more.... The front of the car is on jack stands and the back is real low, so the ratchet has enough momentum that it not only continues down the the head pipe, but goes past the collector, and into a giant flowmaster! Have I mentioned every thing on this car is a cast iron bitch to remove and work on? Three and a half hours later it was back on the road..... best part was there was witnesses.... The laughter of friends, right Elpolacko?

 

Glad to see I am not the only one to screw this one up
I had a 482 cubic inch BBC in 1971 ( very BIG BBC engine for the time ) ... with a full set of HOOKER competition headers. Pain in the butt to install ...

I had just set the 482 back into the 1969 Nova SS ... installed the headers and had everything installed and ready to crank the 482 ... after I primed the engine with a homemade cut down Chevy distributor priming tool ... and NO oil pump shaft. I almost cried

NEVER made that mistake again.
Made plenty of others but just not that one

 

Left the rotor button out one time. Cranked an cranked on this thing, no fire. Till a friend who was laughing his ass off,watching me checking firing order, ignition wires an plugs. Walks over and hands me the rotor button. What would we do with out friends.

 

i dropped in a 383 in a 55 chevy 210 got all the top stuff bolted up all i needed to do was the exhaust starter and converter bolts went to go get the jack and kicked the flex plate on the ground. i never have been so pissed at my self.

 

I think confidently I can top this. I am the be all end all master of stupid mistakes.

Here's a good one, I had a Chevy 2500 HD pickemup that I used to tow with, bought it in nice shape but needing some mechanical work for $300 from a friend. Got it on the road after some breaks, new axles etc, developed a rod knock, so of course, I put a louder radio in. Got a 51 Merc in NC and on the way back really started huffing crazy oil. Well, after getting a 50 Merc parts car from a HAMBer, the motor came apart on the Garden State Parkway. Well, I got a motor, and in my freetime put it in, no biggie. Bolted the converter up and wasn't paying attention, heard a click and noticed it jumped forward a bit. I couldn't seat it back to where (I thought) it was before, and after having it running it just made some awful noise (grinding) and figured the converter and perhaps input shaft was toast. I developed an acute hatred for working on it by that point, so I decided to sell it, $500 and it was gone later that day.

Well, we had just moved into our first house that took 6 months of work to get done, and on the weekend of our move in party me (already drunk) had to move the truck forward a few feet to fit some relatives cars in the driveway. I just got in, put the transfer case in neutral and had some friends push. Put the parking brake on, and being already sauced, forgot it was in neutral. Really never left the transfer case in neutral, ever.

The transfer case stayed in neutral, apparently, until after I sold it. I called the guy who bought it on a sudden brainfart and told him start it, put the transfer case in gear, and let me know what happens. He registered it and was driving it later that day.

I really don't care though, that was a kickass party. Who cares if I lost a bunch of time on a shitty truck.

 

I've got two that I can remember, though I'm sure there's more. I was putting new points in an old Buick and when I was done, it wouldn't start. I had never done points before, so I was convinced I had done it wrong. I pulled the old points out and put the new ones back in, it still wouldn't start. As I'm leaning over the radiator, trying to figure out what went wrong, I look down at my left hand, and it's on top of the rotor. Still laying on the radiator. I had put the cap back on with no rotor. The best part was, I have this buddy who is one of the know it all types. He went to Wyotech, and was always saying how to do this or that. Well he happened to be there, I held up the rotor, thinking he would realize my mistake, he kinda looked at me wierd and said, "What's that?"

The second time, I put an oil pump in a 223 Ford six. I had the truck lifted up with stands under the frame. That gave me just enough room to get the pan off, and barely enough to get it back on without making a mess. I buttoned it up and lowered the truck. I had forgotten to get a priming tool, and didn't have a vehicle to get one (my truck was my only transportation), so I cobbled one together out of a 1/4" drive extension, and a socket. I put it in the drill, gave it a whirl and got it primed. I thought I was pretty smart, until I went to remove the primer. The socket I used was magnetized just enough to pull the pump shaft out of the pump, and drop it into the pan. It had taken me most of the morning to get it done, and I had to be to work. I pulled the pan, pulled the pump, put the shaft back in, installed the pump and pan, and got it running and was only an hour late to work.

 

1968 I'm trying to get a 421 SD Pontiac started. I won't bore you on all the differnt problems that come up between a 389 and a 421. It was the engine from hell. I finally got the problems sorted out but it won't start. Just a pop now and then. I spent a whole weekend checking the firing order. I checked it so often that I memorized the firing order. It was always up on no.1 when checked. Plenty of spark. Same firing order as the Chevys that I had a little experience with.

It turns out that the Pontiac rotates CCW. Oops rearrange evy wire except 1 and 6 and it fired right up. A wasted weekend and a bloody forehead from banging my head against the wall.

 

I swapped 400 SBC for a 305. The 305 had a large enough hole to allow dropping the pump drive in. The 400 didn't. I just ground the sleeve off and dropped it in.

 

Several years ago, I freshened up a '66 283 out of a chevy II, only had around 67,000 miles on it, shouldn't need much. Dropped the pan to check rod and main brgs., all looked good. Converted it to a rear sump configuration to drop it in...well, something other than a chevy II. Filled 'er up with oil, pressurized the oiling system. Oil pres. looked good. Time to stab the distributor and fire it up in it's new home. Nice screeching sound coming out of the timing cover area and zero oil pressure. Pulled the dist. and re-primed a couple of times, had pressure, stabbed the dist. and still-no oil pressure.
By now you probably know where I'm going with this.
The chevy II 283's with front sump has a shorter pump drive shaft. Install a rear sump pump, and I need a shaft about an inch longer(what she said, I know). CRAP. Found a new, longer shaft and back in business.

 

When I was 16 I burned the clutch up in my 62 Fairlane. No problem pull the tranny put new clutch and pressure plate in. Get the pilot tool out line it all up should be good to go. I went to put the tranny in and no go. I tried everything so I start calling my buddies and ask them whats up still no luck! I fought this thing for 3 days every now and the my Dad would come out look to see how I was doing and go back in the house. Finally I go in and tell my Dad that the clutch must be wrong and what should I do.He looks at me and says go put a bottle jack under the front of the engine and jack it up a little then try it. So I do and bam goes right in! I go ask my Dad why he didn't say something earlier and he said I was to busy asking my buddies instead of asking him. LESSON LEARNED that day!

 

Here's one I just did.

I was adding this fancy $300 tie rod set from Fatman, but I had to put them in lower to clear my SBC in my '51 Ford.

I had to carefully re-drill the holes on this 3/4" thick plate to countersink some screws into the frame, heat and bend the pitman arm to just the right angle, and worst of all cut my exhaust to make room for all of it.

It worked great, cleared the flywheel, turned nice, on a jackstand.

Dropped it to the ground and everything lockeed up tight, the car is too low so the tie rods press up right against the center link.

Live and learn!

 

As a teen working on my 1972 chevelle with the smog motor 307 I changed the oil and had a big jug of oil pour it all in started it up after a while i notice a leak I had blew out the main seal. real fun to replace with motor still in car.

 

Student and I both blew it - We used to run Formula Mazdas in a support race for NASCAR at Sears Point. In 1998 we had to thrash through a gear box to the pole qualifier - he had chucked a tooth. We get car up (lifted by three guys) and get rear wing off and get into the quick change - go go go no lunch. The Hewland Mark 9 uses a pinion shaft nut and a lay shaft nut with cotter pins.
Car goes out in race =whew= we did it.
Radio call comes in - car has discontinued at top of hill turn 2
Kid reaches in apron pocket and extracts said layshaft nut and cotter pin
Seems that quick bite of sandwich was enough to dnf the pole sitter and loose him the race in front of 90,000 spectators - shame on him and I didn't double check shame on me

 

I ONCE forgot to snap the oil pump drive into the plastic holder and had the oil pump oil pan and intake all on the engine.

 

Did a head gasket job on an OHC 4 cylinder. I went to crank it up and she locked up solid. Turns out I was one tooth off the cam timing on an interference engine. Bent a valve and broke the guide while pulling the valve out. That'll never happen again.

 

Slightly O/T;

My first job, at 15, was helping out a British car specialist, handing him tools and so on... My FIRST day, my FIRST ''job'' helping him put a Jag auto-box on a Triumph Stag V8. As we were buttoning it up he was under the car whilst I was on top, handing him bolts and studs.
The LAST bolt fell in a small hole on top of the bellhousing and got stuck inside .....

That man hated me. Didn't had that job long, luckily I soon found my way to a GM-dealership, hahahaha!

 

These are great. I have a few incidents come to mind:

I was reassembling a 302 for an off topic car. Get the drill on the oil pump to prime it, nothing. Checked the oil level, checked the pump drive shaft engagement, spun that thing for 20 minutes, nothing. Finally I look at the drill, and the little button is in the reverse position. I flip it, spin it, instant oil. Doh!

I was working at a used car lot when I was in high school. The boss asked me to check something on the engine of an old Renault or Pugeot or some foreign thing. I get in, pull the hood lever, and go around front. The hood hasn't popped. Bang on it a few times, nothing. I had another employee come help, and we had most of the grill and valance off the car to free up what we figured to be a stuck latch when I noticed the hinges. Went to the back of the hood, and it lifted right up.

Another used car lot story. We had a standard shift car that wouldn't start. Someone got the bright idea to push it with another car, and have the inexperienced 16 yr old in the dead car put it in 5th and pop the clutch. Reverse in this car was where 5th was on the 5 speeds I was used to. The push car guy got me up to about 15 mph. The last thing he saw before I went up and over his hood were my reverse lights.

 

The coupe grill is still pushed in at the bottom from my dad pushing the neighbor kid's car to start it in the 1980s. The kid was in reverse when he popped the clutch...

Slonaker

 

When I was younger I swapped a motor out of one truck into another.It was a caddy 472 Got it all together and it would not fire.I pulled motor and sold truck ,Now I think back and the problem was reverse rotation on the distributor ,I was just young and dumb

 

had a 68 bronco when i was a freshman in college. it was a heap but it had a strong 289 with a 3 on the tree and was lots of fun. hadnt really been around front drums much and the bronco was fading fast and wouldnt stop.

i sprung for some drums and shoes and asked around at my night job on friday night if anyone knew about front drums. asked the "ford guru" he said you just pull em right off.

spent all day that saturday for almost 8 hours literally beating the drums to pieces and prying them off with a chisel. would not "pull right off". i had never or since been at that level of pissed off working on a vehicle. i was so cranked up my nose started to bleed!!

got em back on buttoned up everything was kosher.

got into work monday night after class and willie "the ford guru" asked me how it went and i told him about hammers,chisels and nosbleeds. he then says ... did you put an old lug nut on the studs and drive em out a little? they press on the studs ya know.

all that anger came back and if jim hadnt been behind me to grab me i would have strangled that old man.

 

Rebuilt my 351W (more like replaced everything below the heads after grenading it big time after someone else's F**k up, but that's another story). Bored replacement block, set of flat tops, nice cam, buttoned it all back together and put it in the car, primed oiling system, dropped in dist, fired it up, would run then lose oil pressure and lifters would clatter, shut it off, much head scratching and retrying, same result. Stumped. Walked past the destroyed block still sitting on the floor and there was the answer staring right back at me. When I got the new block back from the machine shop I installed a full set of core plugs and oil gallery plugs (got a packaged set with everything required, or so I thought). Seems there was 1 not included in the set and I had missed it - across the back of the block runs an oil gallery from one side lifter feed to the other, hidden when the intake is fitted. If it hadn't have been for the old block sitting there mocking me I would never have found it, pulled the intake and there was a half inch hole just begging for a gallery plug, knocked one in, buttoned it up again, fired it up - perfect. that engine never let me down again.
Now, back to the reason it grenaded on me. Some dick-wad who had the car before had the pan off at some stage and had been a bit heavy handed with the gorilla snot sealant on the pan gasket. Eventually a big bead of it came adrift on the inside and blocked off the pickup enough so that while cranking down the road at 80plus the two rear rods seized on the crank and chainsawed the bock apart. WARNING - use gorilla snot sparingly!