1. do not bring a tweeker within 20 miles of my place!!! 2. well #1 is the most important, being very anti-social for the most part the friends that do come over know where the shitter is and knows where the beer is. 3. opinions are like assholes, everyone has one, but in my garage my is right. 4. if you spill oil, Wipe the shit up!!!!!!!
Don't come to my garage unless.... You can bust on my cars and shop, or I'll feel bad bustin' on YOUR shit You can clear the place with a burritto fart, cause pay backs are hell ! You can ask for help and then axsept it without tellin' everyone they are wrong You are willing to lend a hand as all are willing to lend to you, unless you don't have a greasy thumb, then just bring beer and be entertaining! Don't come to my garage... If you think Boy George has musical talent If you think Will Castro is a bad ass car builder If you have your favorite brand of auto and all else are junk, and you can't take herazzzment about it If you would win a lottery and then try to outbid Ron Pratt at a B/J auction, unless it's a really bitchin' chick you would be hookin' up with
Be respectful of my stuff Pay favors forward You can have anything I own You cannot use the mill or lathe If you want to have carnal knowledge of my dog, hang on till I get the camera and a beer.........
#1- if I am helping ..you should offer to supply the beer and snacks #2- If we are using some of my chemical/consumable supplies to help you for free then have the decency to replace them or even leave a few bucks for me to. The considerate buddy usualy picks up some stuff on the way over and says "hey i got a couple extra cans of brake clean for ya" or something. #3- No I don't keep track of who owes who what ....but a mooch is easy to spot. Lets be real, supplies and time get costly when they constantly wring you dry. #4- Don't bother harassing me about the incomplete or unstarted projects. If I wasn't working on your crap I could be making my own progress. #5- Ribbing is healthy ....if you expect me to help you for free than I will probably dispense some "shit talking" #6- Pissing= Daylight hours,go inside the house and have fun getting past my kodiak bear of a dog.(he's too nice to a fault)....Dark hours,go outside the back door of the shop....don't be a retard if there is beer in the snow then move down hill of the beer. #7- if you get hurt I will laugh and deny it happened here. Watch what you are doing. .....I don't need to be a safety consultant. #8- absurd ignorance can be left elsewhere....I deal with enough of that in daily life,I don't need it finding it's way to my garage.....Unless there is a group of us in the garage,then I welcome it only out of it's entertainment value. #9 I do not mind loaning a tool BUT if you can not grasp the value of that tool to me and return it in a timely manner it will be the last time I loan you anything. Yes I will also be an asshole right in front of you and go to my dry erase board and write "your name, stole tool name on date" You can redeam yourself upon tool return. This way I can instill a little guilt that may help my tool find it's way home. #10- if you think the numbers of this list are in order of importance then refer to #8 #11- If you bring someone I do not know, I will put trust in you to make a integrity decision on your "buddy" prior to their arrival. You will be held responsible for their theft! #12- If you get caught stealing expect the beating of your life! A garage and it's contents are sacred! We as an enthusiast group are a different breed of people....We purchase tools to work which we refer to as play. ...We buy "junk" which we treasure as a part of us. So if you treasure your human body parts as much as I treasure my "stuff" then straighten up or stay away! #13- Having fun will be expected. I am not a psychologist so I can not help you with your problems. Your here to have fun. However a story of your problems may be found humourus. #14- Try to clean up the mess made. Clean up the tools and put them on the bench. As stated by someone else a missplaced tool is considered stolen until it surfaces. #15- You can comment on my messy garage only if you are dead serious about helping to clean and organize. Otherwise don't bother me about the mess,I can see it too. #16-respect my decisions on quiting time,available hours,direction of work and general thoughts. I have my reasons to my madness. #17 Kids are welcome when appropriate,BUT must be able to listen to directions and cautions.I expect you to watch your kids as they belong to you not me. If they are interested in learning then that would be a huge plus. If I visit your garage pretty much everything is reversed.Feel free to impose your rules.
I know I'm reviving an old thread, but dealt with similar issues this past weekend. Rule 1) The tires on my roadster are not damn chairs. Rule 2) See rule 1 Rule 3)I invited you, not your friends Rule 4) Please put my tools back Anymore I'm really gun shy about letting people see inside my garage/shop. Not only is my car in there, but also my non HAMB Mustang and my sister's hotrod. Maybe it's just me. But I trust very few people anymore. All it takes is one person to brag about what's in so and so's garage/house/gun cabinet to the wrong person. Especially in today's trying times. Like I said, it's probably just me erring on the side of caution.
Generally the only one around when I wrench is dad, and he only comes to drink a few beers and make sure to tell me I'm doing it wrong...
#1 Don't slip in the oil #2 Don't touch any electrical cords #3 Don't light a match #4 If you do 1,2 or 3, I have never seen you before.
If the garage door is open...I’m working. If the garage door is closing... I see you and your not invited. If I go to someone’s garage it’s to b.s. I’ll help if asked. Even if I know what your doing is completely wrong I won’t say a word. None of my business.
Bring cash, it costs a dollar to get your ass whipped on the dart board If I've got it and you need it, tell me and it's yours. No crying drunks.
It's a respect thing. Plus the car was my Dad's pride and joy, and it's my pride and joy now. He would never allow it and neither do I. There are bar stools and chairs to sit on, not my car.
heck, in my shop while the bums are sitting on the tire, i can see them secretly wishing for a flat spot on the headlight to set down a beer can
1) Don't show up drunk or drinking. Your help and suggestions will probably be of little actual help. 2) If you're going to help me with something, whether asked or volunteered, If I say "Um" or "Uh" don't immediately say "What???" My "Um" or "Uh" is just a way for you to know that I'm about to want your help but I haven't quite figured out how you'll play into helping. 3) Gotta pee?.....go pee on a tree outside. Don't pee on my building. 4) Smoke if you want to but use the ashtray. If you don't want to smoke, don't be offended if I fire up a cigar and have a few puffs. 5) Don't question how I'm building my car or whatever I'm working on. I'm building the way I want. If I want or wanted your input it will be requested. Yeah....I guess I sound un-sociable, but actually I'm quite friendly! Lynn
My stuff is not yours. Don't bring anyone to my garage if I don't know them. Alcohol is fine as long as you don't get stupid. My neighbors are my neighbors. Do not get stupid with them unless they get stupid with you. Do not touch anything unless I say you can. If I allow you to use my stuff be sure to clean it or replace what is used. Always have money because I am not your bank. Do not ever attack my dog. Do not ever flirt with my wife. She does tell me when it happens and she will call your wife. Talking with her is fine but check your attitude. My lawn and garage floor is not your ashtray or trash pit. If I allow you to use my bathroom then you had better clean your own mess. This includes flushing the fucking toilet. Jokes are fine but don't be stupid. Sent from my SM-G973U using The H.A.M.B. mobile app
Come on in, rule 1, politics are like religion, best discussed by people of their own faith. Cars, discussions are open
I dont wanna talk about your feelings...............I don't give a shit. My shop rate is 100 bucks a hour..................includes standing time........What are you even doing here ? anyway............
When I first got my Ford, my buddy was stopping by with someone I knew, but shows up with someone I don't know. The car was outside but the garage stayed closed until I was able to vet the unknown guy. When I did a lot of machining late at night, I had a black sheet hung up to block the open garage door from the street. Open garage doors are creep magnets. In summer it was too hot to work with the door open. Another one... if you come over, leave your dog at home. I had one guy I know stop in and his dog jumps on my car fender, lucky it was in prime and no damage was done.
My rules are very simple. If you are here, you've been invited, you alone...either for me to help you or you to help me. I have any tool you will ever need, just ask and I will get them and I will put them away. If it's not yours don't touch it. Treat everything as if were mine...it is!!! If I want you here, I will offer the food and drinks and the next time you come you'll supply them. I there is no first offer, there won't be a second!!! Have fun and follow the "Golden Rule"
Lots of great rules posted in the last 5 pages! Some of mine would include: If you gotta fart in my garage, that's fine...but over there, not where I'm working or likely to get even a faint whiff, better yet, step outside the door and don't return until the trail is stale, I don't want to smell that it "followed you in". If you open it, close it...goes for cupboards, doors or drawers. If you swept it up, don't leave it in a pile to be found later or walked through...the dust pan is over there, finish the job. If you ask me to work on your car/project...it's at my shop rate, by the hour, however long it takes, and the clock is still running during the "while you're at it could you also...", I don't do estimates. I expect you to bring or get the parts or shop supplies needed...if not, I will reach into my stash but expect it to be replaced or paid for (it costs me money to keep my shop well supplied). Don't follow me like a puppy or make me walk around you...I want to go from here to there using the most direct route. Make room and be prepared to step aside if I'm moving in your direction. I'm somewhat particular (fussy, anal, whatever term you want to use) about my shop, tools, projects, space, quality of work etc. Please take this into consideration while in my space, or using my stuff.
In 50 years I never had any problems that I remember, so this is an eye opener for me. I guess I was just lucky, best guys ever. Now it's real simple, no rules needed, I've outlived all my car buddies. Ponder that a bit.
3.) If you leave a chew spitter anywhere in the shop you will be banished I did this once. . . . . I called my host on the way home, told him where I left it and that I felt really bad. He was cool about it. At my shop. . . . I don't have any rules. I had to remove only one person in twenty years The state he was in, he probably had no idea where he was.
Hey guys in my previous post I forgot a rule. it's about dogs. Last week there were 3 girls(a brunette, a redhead and a blonde) with their guys talking about their upcoming kids. The brunette says, well I was on the bottom so we are having a boy. The redhead says, well I was on the top so we are having a girl. After a long pause the blonde breaks down crying and says I'm having 3 litters of puppies.....
We put our flags up outside the shop to let buddies know we are working and its cool to drop by if they want, no flags out dont bother stopping. Also folks tend to lean on cars without thinking much about it sometimes, maybe they arent shitheads theyre just dummies. So put a cover on the finished cars with nice paint, that seems to serve as a deterent for the leaning problem. Also keeps the shop dust off of and out of the nice cars, less detailing means more time to cruise. I have a big tree but we also keep a small RV toilet on a 4 wheel dolly if you need to take a leak middle of winter, or neighbors are out or whatever. Roll it out once in a while and empty it in the pasture, it was a freebie and serves the purpose well. Signs that say no smoking and keep my door closed, ashtrays outside. I like the place to be welcoming to the right people, dont let the wrong ones in and its usually all a good time.
One rule no one mentioned yet. If I go to someone's shop and they are working on something I do not say anything, I especially don't go over and tap them on the shoulder. I stand quietly in their line of sight but well back, like 10 feet and wait for them to notice me. This goes double if they are using power tools. I don't want someone to startle me when I am working and neither does anyone else. Also don't bring strangers over without permission. It's bad enough having you hanging around without some yahoo I don't even know. If you bring someone you better be able to vouch for them.
If Im a visitor. I dont touch anything. If you ask me to come work on your project, have parts, tools ready. Or ask me to bring something specific thats needed. Im not bringing the whole tool box. If you come to my shop, dont bring anyone I dont know. If I wanted them to see my stuff, I would have invited them. I keep the door locked and will step outside if someone I dont know shows up. The overhead only gets opened 2 feet for airflow so people cant see in. I have 2 hard old time folding chairs in the shop, theyre on the shelf. Nothing else to sit on. Lets do work, or go somewhere else to hang out and / or drink beer. Theres no fridge, just filtered water and cups. The cars I saw growing up that got built by 6 guys hanging around drinking beer, werent the cars I wanted to ride in. So, its not how I build.
Yeah, I have to be honest, I don't have rules for my shop. I'm blessed to have great friends and family that treat me and my stuff with respect, so it's really been a non-issue. My shop is also tucked away up on my property, so I don't have random people dropping in because they saw something cool going on. When friends come over to work, there is usually a task at hand and we get to work on it. If we're working on a friend's project, they always bring beer and food. This isn't a stated rule, but has always been the case and my friends have always done so without being prompted because they're great people and not because I asked. The shop has been a fun place where friends can come over and we can do serious shit. That's one of the major reasons why I built it. I can think of a day last summer where a buddy lost the rear main seal in his 2009 Audi A4. The dealership wanted $6000 to do the job. He, his wife and daughter (she's about a year older than mine) came up in the morning, the women relaxed while the kids played together, then they got in the pool and lounged around while a couple other friends came over and lent a hand in the shop. His wife bought pizzas for us in the shop, and then later the women BBQ'ed for us for dinner. Around 9 pm we lowered the car off the lift completed and we cracked some beers in the pool. A truly great day. One rule I do have for myself as well as anyone else is that no hot work is done within 15 mins of leaving the shop. No exceptions. The other rule is that if my daughter hands you a tool, take it and pretend to use it.
The Jalopy Journal
