Technical What is the goofiest “On the road” repair you have ever done?

We where towing a vehicle with a 69 international pickup we had converted to a wrecker. And the fuel pump went out. So We pulled the shift boot of and used one of the radiator hose clamps to secure it to the filler neck. Used a piece of fence wire twisted tight to replace the radiator hose clamp. Straight lined the connections at the fuel pump. Used a clamp from the fuel pump. to clamp a air hose to the small end of the shift boot. Used the air chuck on the end to get air from the spare to pressurize the gas tank. My sons rode in the bed and when it started running out of gas they just added more air until the shift boot ballooned. Years before I had a Y block in my 56 ford truck and the fuel pump went out Near Walnut Ridge Ar, Took off the hood & set it in the bed and hooked a hose directly to the carb. Siphoned a glass bleach gallon jar full of gas and siphon fed the carb . Big Pat Miguire held his arm out the window holding the jug high enuf to siphon. we had to refill that jug a couple of times .

 

I've had the best Luck when breaking down on highway with things falling into place for the good, met many good people on the road for repairs and treated fairly money wise. One that pops in this Am, towing racer, driving all night to get there, fan belt breaks on my Chevy van, takes all the belts off and now we are driving on battery, lights getting dim, we come to a town, see a big Chevy dealership from road , take off ramp, pull into dealership and there were lights on in garage area, a mechanic working the night shift, talk to the man, explain our problem, can he sell me some belts as parts dept is closed. He states, Sure No Problem, gets the belts, puts them on for us, when asked what I owed him, his answer, No charge, I'm a huge race fan, good luck on your trip. He would not take any money. I gave him my business card and told him come to the races, find me and I'll take care of his pit pass etc. He did show up one night and we took care of him and his girlfriend, they had a great time. Another time driving to our Up North home the alternator on my truck seized, took the serpentine off, small fire, exciting for a few minutes, again driving on battery come into town and see lights on at the local NAPA store, they had a garage/shop with store, it's midnight, I stop, mechanic/owner was working on his hobby car, explain my deal, His answer, No Problem, gets one off shelf and a belt, offers to install for $25 if I pay cash for everything. I bought everything of that type at that store for years until he retired/sold. I Have many stories. I have stated many times, I'm a very Lucky man.

 

I was driving my HighBoy Roadster home one night and went over some bad RR tracks and it landed hard, shut the car off. So... I figured I knocked something off/loose, start checking, determine no spark, mind you it's 1Am, dark night, did have a flashlight, check all wires including attached to distributor Ok, Accell mini type, Hmm..... take cap off and the little plug in module had come off the pins = no spark, plug it in, fire up , go home. The whole time doing this I was hoping a local sheriff would not show up to assist me as I'd had a few beers with friends at the tavern cruise in, hence the 1 Am. Same car, different time on way to a cruise a some miles away, car shuts off. Start checking, got spark, no fuel, start checking around and feel electric fuel pump, Very Hot, WTH, think about it, got my chair out to let it cool off, cools off, fire up, make it back home. I replaced the pump and that one did same deal 2 years later. So......Now I change back to a mechanical pump, after about a year I was fooling around racing a guy and when I slowed down I hear a noise, thought I broke a rocker or bent a pushrod, but it was running too good for that, I get to the cruise in and asked a friend (life long friend, and a real mechanic) to listen, his instant diagnosis, the little spring on fuel pump arm that keeps arm to cam broke or fell off, common problem now with all the import crap.

 

My Better half was driving her 50 Chevy and courting me around on Father’s Day. Went over a good size rail crossing and the rear shock mounts crossmember welds decided they could not take anymore. Broke the welds also lowering the gas tank. (Full Tank also) We were about 2 miles away from our maximum distance for towing coverage. Needed to hold up the crossmember but with what.... across the street they were putting down new Turf at the Putt Putt. Those glue buckets had nice heavy handles on them. Breaking them off the bucket and wrapping them around the frame and Crossmember. Nice and solid.
Drove the extra few miles and now within the covered distance.
Kept an extra bucket Handle in the car just in case.

 

The one that sticks out in my mind was over a half life time ago. OT by a few years 67 Chevelle. Cruising at about dusk with a young well endowed personable blond I'd been dating for a few years. She'd been around long enough to see what the car was when I got it and knows the hours I've got in to make it what it was at that point. We're cruising no where in particular. Pull up at a stoplight in front of a firehouse. Car is looking good. Loping idle,aggressive but not overly loud exhaust note. Volunteers sitting at the firehouse sitting out front of the station throw up a few signals,I assume to show appreciation and maybe to egg me on to do a burnout. Almost like clockwork the car dies and smoke starts pouring out of the console.. Well since the bright red paint,cam,exhaust and most likely blond caught their attention the FFs come over at a brisk pace. Girl bails out the door,heros run in to station to grab spray liquids because well,smoke means fire. Meantime,I'm still behind the wheel trying to get the top plate off the console because that's where the smoke was coming from. Been burned and bloodied by this car on many occasions but at this point and I'm hellbent this isn't how I get separated from this vehicle. I've got a pair of comms shears and a cable sheath knife in a pouch on my side. Get the shift plate off with the sheath knife before axes and or the jaws of life were deployed and see what I have to assume is a neutral safety connection attached to the shifter on fire. Pull it,melting plastic in to the fingers and cut the end off the wires. Convince the FFs not to pump 3k gallons of water in to the interior and just assist me pushing the car out of the way for a repair or tow. Get the car in the driveway to the firehouse. Strip the wires that were once connected to the now melted plastic connection back together and the car starts back up. Fairly certain if it weren't for the blond in the passenger seat catching the attention of the FFs that car would have sat in that intersection and either burned up or gotten towed before the volunteers would have helped. Incidentally,other than putting a crimp connector what was literally my roadside repair I never investigated the cause of the problem any further. Started in any gear beyond that day. I drove that car daily for a couple of years past that and I believe at that point it was already 30+yo. Still regret selling it after building it up from a wreck,selling it,buying it back and selling it yet again. Car left twice,blond left more than once and came back and still lingers on til this day. I still wish the car would come back a 3rd time.... History I'm sure would prove that the mechanical being has had less meltdowns then the female since that day. Back in the day both were hot as hell. Last time I saw the car it was a gutted out tubbed shell,well the woman in all honesty if I squint a bit is what I remember her to be back then. I'm at the point I'd put in the effort to rebuild both. I'm ballsy enough to say that to a car but not so much to the woman. She put in the time and I paid for her medical training. I'm fairly sure she could end me and make it look like natural causes if properly motivated. Just in case she's proficient enough to track my posts, I loved them both equally back in the day and I have sold the car but kept her. Closing statement. Just in case I've said too much.

 

The aluminum throttle pedal hinge on my 18 wheeler rotted off and I had no throttle at midnite 100 miles from home. I used a coat hanger to attach the pedal to the drivers seat. Got home ok

 

My jumper cables clamped to the tailpipe then slammed under the trunk lid trick cannot hold a candle to some of you hacks. Bravo.

 

From my childhood, my Dad ( both parents depression Era children, so both original DIY/ Survivor type ) always had some old car, fixer uppers, one I remember this AM, the windshield wipers quit on a racing trip so Dad rigged up string on the blades, him pulling, then Mom pulling to have wipers, can still hear Mom/Dad discussing this setup as some rain was coming in window on her, I have many funny stories from my childhood and realize how good it really was, not a Ward and June fantasy.

 

Good save!

 

Lost an axle key way out in the Mojave Desert in my 40 Ford P/U, used a lug wrench to get the hub nut off searched around the desert found a metal scrap close to a key hacksawed it made the trip home with a very easy on the throttle foot.

 

In about '68 my brother-in law bought an late 50's Anglia at a police auction. 4 cylinder. Something broke in the front suspension . We parked it along the road and we went to a junk yard about a mile away and actually found a complete front end laying there! I believe we paid $35. we rigged up a tarp over the front end as it was raining and changed the entire front suspension along the road. About a month later the engine blew.