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Guilt

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by Ryan, Jan 7, 2013.

  1. Ryan
    Joined:
    Jan 2, 1995
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    14,885
    Location:
    Austin, TX

    Ryan
    ADMINISTRATOR
    Staff Member

  2. Special Ed
    Joined:
    Nov 1, 2007
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    Location:
    Southern California

    Special Ed Member

    Baby steps and silver linings .... :)
  3. need louvers ?
    Joined:
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    Location:
    phoenix, az

    need louvers ?
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Dude, you just hit on one of my secret weapons in life. When it's all shitty, go hammer the Plym for a bit. It always kinda acts like my schnauzer when we play hard, where it's tired but way happy. Always makes me feel better too, no matter what. Best way ever to shrug off a crap life's passage...
  4. eddie1
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    Maple Ridge, BC

    eddie1 Member

    It's good to have you back.
    Register now to get rid of these ads!

  5. Older'n dirt
    Joined:
    Jul 15, 2009
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    Location:
    Sneakin' Sally thru the alley.

    Older'n dirt
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Whatever works man. God Bless you Ryan.
  6. One day at a time. You WILL get through this. Keep repeating that until you believe it.

    Now...go break something already! :)
  7. porknbeaner
    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2003
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    25,719
    Location:
    Raytown, MO

    porknbeaner Member

    Ryan,

    To a lot of us you are family. Perhaps not all of us fall into the family I would like to have category, but family none the less.

    If there was a way that I could fix what ails you I would. But alas I cannot, life is a bitch, and that is sugar coated if you catch my drift.

    You do whatever it is to make yourself better. Don't give us a second thought, we are family. When you are up we are here and when you are not we are still here.
  8. Waddayacare
    Joined:
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    3,874
    Location:
    NY - The land of Taxes, Fees & NO Gun Rights

    Waddayacare BANNED

    The "GO" pedal always seems to have a way of being therapeutic.
  9. Zapato
    Joined:
    Mar 5, 2001
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    1,519
    Location:
    Brush Prairie,Wa

    Zapato Member
    1. 1952-59 Ford Social Group

    Something learned in a little Asian hell hole back in '72. Any day no one was trying to kill me was a good day, constantly remind myself of that single fact. No idea how life is dumping on you right now rest assured it will get better much as this mornings ride started to show you already.
  10. Flowmeister
    Joined:
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    Location:
    Calgary, Alberta,Canada

    Flowmeister
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Hang in there brother.
    A good Hot Rod is like a good friend,
    you can lean on them as hard as you need to, and they won't falter,
    holding you up where you need to be.

    It is going to be alright.
  11. need louvers ?
    Joined:
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    need louvers ?
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Very well said 'beaner!
  12. gilby's garage
    Joined:
    Oct 12, 2011
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    383
    Location:
    west hills ca.

    gilby's garage Member

    at last the release, like the pressure valve just let loose. that is a feeling i yern for, my pressure has been trying to release for some time now, my coupe project is in it's 14th month and i'm starting to go crazy, i may have to dust off my aluminum nose dodge max wedge and pull off a couple speed runs just to blow off my steam,

    Ryan, hang in there, it can only get better! right?

    Attached Files:

  13. PM'ed! (for what it's worth.....)
  14. 117harv
    Joined:
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    Medford Oregon

    117harv
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    I got a little misty reading that. The line about being therapeutic is spot on, be it a hot rod or bike. No matter how bad things in life get, they always seem to get better again and any day above ground is better than one below...thanks for everything Ryan.
  15. BLAKE
    Joined:
    Aug 10, 2002
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    Austin, Texas

    BLAKE
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Nailed it. For different reasons, I've been there... I bet we all have. Things suck. Things get slightly better over a period of time. Meloncholia transitions to guilt-fueled enthusiasm. That enthusiasm drives a zealous reengagement with the things that bring joy.

    Welcome back.
    Last edited: Jan 7, 2013
  16. Yep, sometimes you just need to give yourself a good kick in the pants and a good blast to clear the cobwebs.

    I haven't driven my car on over 3 years. Getting a little closer.
  17. tommy
    Joined:
    Mar 3, 2001
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    14,713
    Location:
    Davidsonville, Md.

    tommy Member

    I hope the skies clear up for you. It is amazing that these old things can stand up to abuse. I'm glad that yours did. (it was built right!) One thing for sure is that you have a pretty big fan club rooting for you. When the sky gets dark, just think about your fan club.
  18. Smokey2
    Joined:
    Jan 11, 2011
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    906
    Location:
    Knoxville Tenn

    Smokey2 Member

    Good for YOU Ryan,

    What You did is the same as Running down a long hill, as fast as You can, and
    screming at the top of Your Lungs !
    Sometimes You just have to let IT out............
    Fortinate that you have something that allowed You to do that, without the runningf
    part.
    God Bless, and glad Your back !
  19. Reds 29
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2006
    Posts:
    387
    Location:
    Central Michigan

    Reds 29 Member

    I know the feeling, I had a heart attack 9 months ago. I was pissed off, frustrated, mad at the world, upset with my body and everyone around me. It was early spring and I hadn't had my Model A coupe out yet. It took a few days to get it out and drive it, but when I did, I did what you did. I smoked the tires down the road, drove like a mad man for about 20 miles. I turned around to come back home and started thinking "damn I'm still alive, I have my car, and my family, I guess I'm going to be ok." Sometimes our cars are the best medicine. The next day a couple of my car buddies came over and that made me feel even better. We need to all stick together through tough times. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. We have never met, but we are all family.
    Red
  20. Harms Way
    Joined:
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    Northern Mi.

    Harms Way Member

    There are a ton of hills and valleys in everybody's life. On the hill tops you can see everything so clearly and all the wonderful things we have to be grateful for. But it's in the valleys that the fog settles,.... And it's hard to see all the blessings, let alone the next step,... or what direction to go. It's at these times we need to remember the awesome view from the mountain top and rest asured, we will see it again...

    I don't know what is going on in your life brother,.... But know there is a very big family (that you created) all over the world that hurts with you, and will be giving you good thought, vibes and prayers as you deal with it..... ( you know what I'll be doing).

    As far as the therapy goes,..... I spent many times full throttling it, trying to outrun the ghosts of my past,..... I would feel more normal and better as I pulled back into my driveway..... and always grateful that I had a release like that...

    Ryan,... you mean more to this community/family than you could possibly imagine.... If you ever need anything,... I am sure there would be a ton of brothers and sisters that would stand in line to help..... Count me in.

    God bless you my friend... tho we don't know what your dealing with.... please know, your aren't going through it alone.
  21. Rickybop
    Joined:
    May 23, 2008
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    Location:
    Michigan

    Rickybop Member

    Wishing you the best, Ryan. God bless you and your family.
  22. Geoff Miles
    Joined:
    Sep 13, 2012
    Posts:
    5

    Geoff Miles Member

    Ryan I've only known you for a few months, but can already say you are one of the best people I know. You proved that just by the way we met. I owe you. If you need anything please come and see me. Heck. I'm gonna get in my Ford and head to your place right now. I got lunch.
  23. general gow
    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2003
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    Location:
    Taunton, MA

    general gow Moderator Staff Member

    i had 3 paragraphs written, but it was all nonsense. go drive your car, buddy. drive it hard and smoke the tires. write about it, and repeat. as my dad would say, "head down, keep movin'."
  24. Malcolm
    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2006
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    Nebraska

    Malcolm
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    I bet your Coupe is a blast to drive... welcome back.


    <iframe width="640" height="480" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/nEIYJxWo2eE?rel=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>



    Malcolm
  25. daddy_o's_diner
    Joined:
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    Midland, Michigan

    daddy_o's_diner
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    I'm truly sorry to hear about your challenges and hope they are on their way to easing up a little on you and yours.

    I'm a firm believer that you gotta take care of you. As selfish as that may sound, If you are not in a good place mentally, how can you take care of your family or be a good friend to those that need you.

    Miserable people make people miserable.

    Think about that for a second. If your in a funk from eating lifes shit shit sandwich, those around you are impacted as well. A person needs to find a way to deal with the issues/depression and right themselves so that they can be the parent, spouse, and/or friend that those depending on them need to be.

    I need to be careful when I say "right themselves". Sometimes it's something that a person cannot do alone. It may take some help from others and even professional help. Nothing wrong with that.

    Other times it may be as simple as a ride in a hot rod. ;)

    Whatever you find it is for you Ryan, DO IT - and do it without guilt!!!

    Please take care of you so you can take care of them.

    You deserve it and they are depending on you.

    God Bless man...


    .
  26. duste01
    Joined:
    Nov 5, 2006
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    Location:
    retro-ville, Kentucky

    duste01 Member

    Well, there you go Ryan. Your in good company. Thats important. Something else in adding my 2 cents of therapeutic experience....Although turning wrenches has always been therapeutic for me, I would have added two things to your to do list there. One, you might add taking something apart to see what's inside, and two, when you went for a stroll, you might add some extra miles (30-50) for your favourite burger. You get a ride, some food, and probably some waves....Peace unto you.
  27. stude_trucks
    Joined:
    Sep 13, 2007
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    4,757
    Location:
    Berkeley, CA

    stude_trucks Member

    Peace brother.
  28. Boones
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    Location:
    Kent, Wa

    Boones
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    nothing better than beating the hell out of the loud pedal when you feel bad. For a brief moment you feel alive and other shit is forgotten.
  29. farmergal
    Joined:
    Nov 28, 2010
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    somewhere

    farmergal Member

    From someone who struggled a lot (years) with a death in the family and family issues; I understand this post and it hits home for me. I grew up in a very loving family, and only being 24 years old, most think that I'm in the glory years of my life and I should be bubbling with happiness. I am;but not like most people my age. I grew up in a very loving and supportive family and 5 years ago I lost my grandmother to Cancer...9 days after diagnosis. She was a motherly figure to me; a part of my everyday life and to see her go from perfect one day...and 9 days later she was gone: I was ruined- completely and utterly devastated. It took awhile for the devastation to show but her death was combined with many family problems that appeared several months afterwards and I felt that guilt. I removed my very few and close best friends from my life; dumped my boyfriend of 2 years (which was probably a wise decision) and started cutting closeness with my family out of my life. I was depressed...very depressed for years. I had anxiety problems from all of the stress. I think the hardest part, for me, was watching my grandfather loose the love of his life- and that hurt BAD. I struggled emotionally for a few years and despite my personal struggles; I found sollace, joy, and comfort in learning new things and devoting myself to the things I loved to do most. Thats part of the reason why I decided to get involved with old cars. It gave me a connection to my still-living grandparents and their days gone by. I still struggle from time to time, emotionally, but I think we all do with certain things. They say that time heals; and it does.But I think that time heals because we find things to take comfort and pride in. Know that we understand and I personally thank you for posting this; it gave me a moment to relate to others and get some of it off my chest.Im very sorry for your loss and your personal struggles with it; my thoughts and prayers are with you. We become better people because of struggles like this :)
  30. LAROKE
    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2007
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    Location:
    Boca Raton, Florida

    LAROKE Member

    Some days are good days . . . All the rest are character builders.

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