Death, disease, & sickness :: Wtf ?

[DE SOTO]

I have noticed that Posters here are FASCINATED with Death, Disease & sickness.

Many post's about People & Animals inflicted with one or the other.

Whats the Facination That compels one to Post about such Personal anguish ?

[2-TONED]

i dont know but there are people dropping like flys around here from one thing or another. :eek:

[hotroddon]

I have noticed that Posters here are FASCINATED with Death, Disease & sickness.

Many post's about People & Animals inflicted with one or the other.

Whats the Facination That compels one to Post about such Personal anguish ?

I guess it makes them feel better. I can understand it when one of our own has an "Issue" and therefore many would like to know but other than that i don't get it either.

[Little Wing]

Sites become more of a Chatroom than ,,a techy car site

[Gotgas]

...I got this stuff leaking out of my...


(fully expecting this thread to be deleted!)

[poboyross]

I have noticed that Posters here are FASCINATED with Death, Disease & sickness.

Many post's about People & Animals inflicted with one or the other.

Whats the Facination That compels one to Post about such Personal anguish ?


I know, right? From one standpoint, I understand the community aspect of letting people know if another in the community has passed or is ill so you can keep them in your prayers or what not. However, if there's random posting going on about "My maw's got the dysentery" or "My dog Fuzz just died", yeah....truly sorry for the calamity, but I've got enough going on and don't need anything else feeding my pharma-TV commercial induced hypochondria or just being a plain downer. I've got calamities, too....I come on here to think about something *else*. Hate to be a douche, but that's how I feel.

[manyolcars]

flies drop?

[DE SOTO]

...(fully expecting this thread to be deleted!)


I do to, But maybe if enough read it they may THINK before they Post.

Maybe ther needs to be an OBITUARY & WHOS ILL section add to the HAMB just for this stuff so People who want to Present themselve to the Dark Feelings can go there in private.

I am NOT trying to be Harsh, Its just something I and alot of People i know that are part of the HAMB have talked of before.

Thats Personal stuff and i for one feel it shouldnt be presented in an otherwise Up Lifting Forumn.

[Junkyard Dog 32]

I went to the doctor today and found out I have a bad case of Hokey Ass... thought you guys on the message board would like to know.



JOE:cool:

[poboyross]

I do to, But maybe if enough read it they may THINK before they Post.

Maybe ther needs to be an OBITUARY & WHOS ILL section add to the HAMB just for this stuff so People who want to Present themselve to the Dark Feelings can go there in private.

I am NOT trying to be Harsh, Its just something I and alot of People i know that are part of the HAMB have talked of before.

Thats Personal stuff and i for one feel it shouldnt be presented in an otherwise Up Lifting Forumn.

Amen to that! PM your friends about it, if it's that big of a burden. I'm only 30 and I could start listing every new affliction that comes my way, but then I'd be reminded of what a crotchety mofo I am.....and I don't want to be reminded! ;)

[Little Wing]

I do to, But maybe if enough read it they may THINK before they Post.

Maybe ther needs to be an OBITUARY & WHOS ILL section add to the HAMB just for this stuff so People who want to Present themselve to the Dark Feelings can go there in private.

I am NOT trying to be Harsh, Its just something I and alot of People i know that are part of the HAMB have talked of before.

Thats Personal stuff and i for one feel it shouldnt be presented in an otherwise Up Lifting Forumn.


Well wasn't the HAMB Chapel made for that ???

[IRCOOTER]

[QUOTE=Junkyard Dog 32;3943407]I went to the doctor today and found out I have a bad case of Hokey Ass... thought you guys on the message board would like to know.


Hey I've been fighting that for a long time myself.:cool:

[Ron Mayes]

...i got this stuff leaking out of my...


(fully expecting this thread to be deleted!)

me too

[Von Rigg Fink]

maybe because you opened the thread you too are "fascinated"
or drawn to it like a fly to a light bulb..or gawk at a traffic accident..I think its human nature hard to de-program.
As for well wishes to a fellow Hot Rodder..I think this place and that going on, brings more of a human element to just a computer Forum.
I dont mind stopping for a few moments ..and wishing someone a better day..maybe we all need to slow down a bit and care about our fellow man...life moves way too fast, its not a bad , or weak thing to care, and show it.

but I do agree this thread will probably die..we should morn that now before it happens:rolleyes:;)

[Ranunculous]

Remember when Bartles and James "thanked you for your support?"
Now,everyone wants "support?"
Pity feels good.It's like someone else cares for you,even if you had to engage them in the deal.

[Ryan]

I agree... It's weird. I delete the ones I feel comfortable enough deleting. Others I let ride.

[DE SOTO]

maybe because you opened the thread you too are "fascinated"
:rolleyes:;)

Has nothing to do with ME being FACINATED ...

Has to with some people don't want to here of this stuff EVERY time the main page is opened.

Why is it to hard to post on HAMB CHAPEL Or maybe its own forumn page ?

I feel for anyone haveing problems or someone that died, But don't want to read about or see it every time i look here.

[Paul]

I hope this thread stays near the top for a while

everybody suffers.
it's a human condition.
with the shear volume of people on the HAMB if we all posted the tragedies in our lives there would be little room for anything else.

we must stay focused on the intent of this forum

[Ryan]

I hope this thread stays near the top for a while

everybody suffers.
it's a human condition.
with the shear volume of people on the HAMB if we all posted the tragedies in our lives there would be little room for anything else.

we must stay focused on the intent of this forum

Totally agree.

[Weeks46]

I have noticed that Posters here are FASCINATED with Death, Disease & sickness.

Many post's about People & Animals inflicted with one or the other.

Whats the Facination That compels one to Post about such Personal anguish ?

I hear ya Desoto, I get the knee jerk whenever I see RR or an o/t car threads pop up. Its the same response I get when I hear about an STD from someone. I like to hear about it only to keep my checks and balances correct and avoid screwing my junk up be it car or otherwise. I take the stuff as a grain of salt and a warning for future reference. Its just like all the great tech on here that gets buried quicker then you can refresh the main page. Its just tech of another caliber but its not what I look to the HAMB for. The same as you have stated above.-Weeks

[STEPHEN FIELDS]

This is a car forum, all the posts about death, sickness, family troubles, dogs, how you chose your screen name, and threads devoted to avatar pictures....I personally could do away with. It needs to go back to traditional pre 64 car talk and tech....just my 2 cents.

[chopped]

Once you accept O/T posts there are no rules.

[Suit]

I know, right? From one standpoint, I understand the community aspect of letting people know if another in the community has passed or is ill so you can keep them in your prayers or what not. However, if there's random posting going on about "My maw's got the dysentery" or "My dog Fuzz just died", yeah....truly sorry for the calamity, but I've got enough going on and don't need anything else feeding my pharma-TV commercial induced hypochondria or just being a plain downer. I've got calamities, too....I come on here to think about something *else*. Hate to be a douche, but that's how I feel.


Oh my God! Fuzz died? Why didn't someone tell me?

[39 All Ford]

When talking about a person of notoriety, MOST EVERYONE wants to know about the passing, a few details of the passing, and a few details of the life that preceded.

For the purpose of the HAMB, a "person of notoriety" might be a famous car guy or a regular old HAMB member.

KNOWING someone has passed can be useful information that may help folks from sticking their foot in their mouth and to be helpful for the benefit of common courtesy.

These threads allow us HAMB folks to offer up our respects, whether this person is someone we know on the HAMB, or someone we view from afar but we respect none the less.

MOST of the time, threads of this nature are just a matter of common respect, when they become morbid, macob, or disrespectful, the posts should probably go away.

To this end, I think the HAMB is managed well enough with regard to this issue.

[seesko]

There's a lot of lonely people out there and some of them are car nuts. I see it all over the internet. Go on a British forum if you really want to hear people whine. Bloody hell!
I think some people get on here and feel at home or that there's like minded people and spill more than car stuff. There are some warm and fuzzy zones.
I think more and more people communicate electronically and less comfortable interacting face to face. Sometime's they are unable to get out due to health and this is a alternative way to talk with friends. That's a good facet of the web.
It's a sign of the times but I agree. This should be for positive car posts and threads. I think there are a lot of friendships forged on here. That's one of the best things about hot rodding. I go for the high road when I can. We need more light and less dark here and everywhere else.
There are some mean natured, negitive posts and replies too but I guess that's just life.
My .02

[Retro Jim]

I really don't mind if someone makes a post of a Famous Hot Rodder or a fellow HAMBer that has passed . I consider all HAMBer's my family ! I will post my respects as many do !
The ones I get tired of seeing is the ones where a " Friend of mine Or You don't know this person but .... " , those are the ones I can't stand ! They have no reason to be posted here on a car site ! I might sound harsh or cold but I come here many times a day to look at car stuff NOT guess who died today that I have no idea who they are and have no affiliation with this site ! It's just one of those areas that shouldn't be posted every day .
We are all getting older everyday and one day we all will die , that's life !

Let's keep this as a car site !

[torchmann]

When talking about a person of notoriety, MOST EVERYONE wants to know about the passing, a few details of the passing, and a few details of the life that preceded.

For the purpose of the HAMB, a "person of notoriety" might be a famous car guy or a regular old HAMB member.

KNOWING someone has passed can be useful information that may help folks from sticking their foot in their mouth and to be helpful for the benefit of common courtesy.

These threads allow us HAMB folks to offer up our respects, whether this person is someone we know on the HAMB, or someone we view from afar but we respect none the less.

MOST of the time, threads of this nature are just a matter of common respect, when they become morbid, macob, or disrespectful, the posts should probably go away.

To this end, I think the HAMB is managed well enough with regard to this issue.
Thats probably the best point ive seen made here.
I have some compassion but hearing about everyone's ills isn't good. I drive Semi's and when you see alot of roadside shrines in a day it has a negative effect on you. I was beginning to get upset about the shrines all over except for when i saw the the big man.
I call the bigman the guy I saw pulled over about a half mile ahead of me. I thought "whats he doing on the shoulder does he have a flat?" as I got closer I saw him kneel with his back to me, He was built like an ox about 6'+ and maybe 250-300lbs and he was wearing a suit. In his right hand was a short handled 20 or 30lb sledge. He'd get this hammer up about halfway over a white cross and it'd fall out of his hand and he'd shake like a baby then pick it up and it would happen again. this guy could literally toss a bull over a fence and to see him stricken down like that changed my perspective.

P.S. seesco, it is a home like place here on the internet. Like hanging at the garage with the buds not like at work or at school.I was thinking of making a website where people could hangout for whatever, talk about anything and especially cover projects, car news and events. even allow folks to share epic fails. I was going to call it torchmanns garage and then I found the HAMB which is almost everything I was thinking of. I'ts a cool place.

[DE SOTO]

As was suggested before, The HAMB CHAPPLE would be the place to post this stuff & NOT the main Page.

I am sure i am not the only one that does not want to here about this stuff..... Fellow Man or Dog/cat !!

If you want to read about it, You can just click on HAMB Chapple to see whos Sick & dead.

Personally i about Puked on my Key Board when they reveled the guy with the Bleeding Ulcer... My Father had one before he passed & its a pretty Fucking Gross subject.

No Disrespect to the guy in Question, Its just what broke the camels back & made me start this post.

[Speedwagen]

Your right DE SOTO, the HAMB CHAPEL is the place for people to bring their life issues for support and prayers if requested.

http://www.jalopyjournal.com/forum/group.php?groupid=186

There are sincere people in that group, who always have a kind word or encouragement for others in need.

[Kilroy]

It's just like all the other bitching about all the other 'Off-Topic' posts...

If you're uncomfortable with it, don't read it... And don't post it...

That means if God-Forbid something devestating happens to you or yours, don't post it here either...

It's pretty easy to condemn the posting taste of others if you're not in their shoes.

Alot of guys are kind of isolated and view this as a community of peers...

We used to use a Garage as the psuedo-setting of the 'HAMB'... Would you tell you're buddies in the garage if you just found out you're dad died?

[ratrodder34]

Does reading this make us "Deadbeats".......Oh just kidding

[DE SOTO]

It's just like all the other bitching about all the other 'Off-Topic' posts...

If you're uncomfortable with it, don't read it... And don't post it...

That means if God-Forbid something devestating happens to you or yours, don't post it here either...

It's pretty easy to condemn the posting taste of others if you're not in their shoes.

Alot of guys are kind of isolated and view this as a community of peers...

We used to use a Garage as the psuedo-setting of the 'HAMB'... Would you tell you're buddies in the garage if you just found out you're dad died?


First off, IF somthing Did happen to someone in my Family i sure wouldnt run to my computer & Post about it on this or any other Forumn.. Thats my personal Bis i have to deal with.

When my Father Died, I didnt tell Anyone 'Cept my Aunt, My Mom & My Boss cus i didnt show up for work that One day.

I don't bring that kinda stuff & dump it on my Friends.... Let alone the world !

[Kilroy]

First off, IF somthing Did happen to someone in my Family i sure wouldnt run to my computer & Post about it on this or any other Forumn.. Thats my personal Bis i have to deal with.

When my Father Died, I didnt tell Anyone 'Cept my Aunt, My Mom & My Boss cus i didnt show up for work that One day.

I don't bring that kinda stuff & dump it on my Friends.... Let alone the world !

You're stoic awesomeness makes me all gooey...

People deal with things in different ways...

Either the HAMB is a forum or a Web-Zine... As long as Humans are allowed to post, 'Personal' stuff will be posted...

It's real life... Sometimes that's uncomfortable.

How do you tell a family you've never met, you're sorry their Son died? I have no idea... Thank god others knew...

Nobody wants to hear about death amongst people they (kinda) know... It sucks. But it happens...

To ignore it, or refuse to talk about it takes the human element out of the HAMB... Do we really want that?

Hell there's enough manufactured drama on the HAMB already... A little real drama is kind of refreshing...

I'm not an overly religious person... I've never been in a 'Chapel' as far as I know... I'm not sure what the 'HAMB-Chapel' adds...

All in all... What the fuck does it hurt?

[DE SOTO]

Well,

Just as it MY opinion that this dosent belong on the Hot Rod Site, You have your opinion that it Does.

I come to sites such as this to do what i know best.. AUTOMOBILES !!

If i want to know about Death Disease & Sickness of Folks i dont know i can watch the news of Iraq, See the Obit's in the Local Paper, or go to some site that is all about the Unfortunate dealings of others.

I sugested another part of the forumn and was supported by others So i am not the only one that dosent want to deal with it on the Main page of a Hot Rod Site.

So, If you feel that the HAMB is a place to air Personal Problems & misfortune ... Please by all means, Do It.

I just Don't see why Everyone needs to know about this kinda stuff when Most people have there own problems to deal with.

I didnt start this to argue with one Guy who feels the need to make HIS point, I was just trying to make it known that we all dont want to hear about every Person, Plant & animal that dies or gets sick.

ITS DEPRESSING !!

If Ryan wants to delete this... Please do so ... No Sweat ..

[Ryan]

Nope Skip.... I'm on your side on this one.

[Daves 48 Special]

It is really hard to deal with sickness ,it does feel better to talk to your freinds about it ,not to fell sorry for you but to just talk........i agree there should be a section for people like my self that have cancer to relate with others that whants to talk about whats going on and for those that dont care dont need to be in that section.......Its all about the human race and hot rods .

[Kilroy]

Nope Skip.... I'm on your side on this one.

Then with all due respect Ryan... Do something about it... Quietly...

I see no need for threads like this basically calling out people who for whatever reason, felt the need to share something tragic, and personal on the HAMB.

Why expose them to possible embarrassment on top of it all...

[Ryan]

Then with all due respect Ryan... Do something about it... Quietly...

I see no need for threads like this basically calling out people who for whatever reason, felt the need to share something tragic, and personal on the HAMB.

Why expose them to possible embarrassment on top of it all...

I hope this thread isn't embarrassing anyone. It shouldn't. It's just a conversation.

I'm put in a tight spot on a lot of these deals. Think about a guy that just lost his mother or something. Dude is down... and who can blame him? Lot's of times, I just don't have the stomach to delete his thread. I can't add to his moment - you know?

As a result, I get tons of reported posts... people angry... etc... about an off topic post. I eat shit... That's my job.

I think a conversation like this is healthy every now and then.

[seesko]

This thread sure gets some people riled up and pissed off.
Doesn't seem like it takes too much to do that.
Parts of this forum feel like you're just hanging with buds in your garage shooting the shit. So what. That is life.
If you don't like it don't read it. Seem's like enough of you go out of your way to shit on someones head that you don't really know. That seems about as perverse as someone spilling a deeply personal thing. Some of you have been on here for years. It's gonna happen when you've known someone for a long time.
Hot Rods just happen to be the bond here.

[49ratfink]

I'm with Desoto on this, I'd never post a personal loss here. that's one of the benifits of the internet,, nobody knows your business.

on the other hand it must give some comfort for those that do, so what are we suppose to do?? like Ryan said...I wouldn't want to be the guy to delete a guys post who is going through a hard time.

[Kilroy]

I hope this thread isn't embarrassing anyone. It shouldn't. It's just a conversation.

I'm put in a tight spot on a lot of these deals. Think about a guy that just lost his mother or something. Dude is down... and who can blame him? Lot's of times, I just don't have the stomach to delete his thread. I can't add to his moment - you know?

As a result, I get tons of reported posts... people angry... etc... about an off topic post. I eat shit... That's my job.

I think a conversation like this is healthy every now and then.

Yeah, I wouldn't want to decide either... And I can imagine what it's like to deal with all the BS that arises here... I'm probably only imagining a fraction of the reality though... Even then, I wouldn't do it.

But I think it's time for a hard and fast rule, or at least, when one of these "I don't want to see this..." posts come up, for you to just say, "It's at my (the Moderators) discretion" and delete it as fast as possible...

My main point I guess is that I think you're doing fine, and that things should remain the way they are now and up to your perogative.

I think an open discussion is fine, but too often these things turn into a smug, superiority-complex, I'm-cooler-than-those-guys, deal that irritates me far worse than the occasional "My _____ died" post...

And for the record, I'm all for smugness as it applies to Traditional Hot Rodding... :D And I think that's part of the HAMB-culture...

But, when it's being directed at people who turned to the HAMB for comfort at a time of personal need, I think it sucks and smacks of Keyboard Tough-guyness...

All that aside, thanks for Tech-Week, I'm done now... :cool:

[Jeem]

How screwed up (complex?!) are we human beans? I've read posts where someone's dog (best friend) died, it's sad, I'm empathetic, but all the while I'm thinking, I didn't post when MY dogs died and actually felt somewhat slighted.....messed up right?!

It's another one of those fine lines......glad it's Ryan's gig and not mine, thanks Ryan. Hahaha

[ratrodder34]

I dont know Ryan but for as long as I have been on here he does a fantastic job...let me say that again FANTASTIC job. I am not up to date on some of the rules as I should be but he keeps us all in compliance with what goes on. I wouldnt want to be in his place either when these situations arise. I am sure we have all been to funeral homes and had NO idea what and how to speak to a person who has lost a loved one. I guess it is easier to do it behind a screen and get some support from the HAMB family members.....

[54BOMB]

Sometimes Ill report posts that are really far off topic, not that Im trying to get in anyone business, just trying to help with content. Mainly because I sit at a desk with a computer 11 hours a day. I do wonder how much reporting is too much.

[HEMI32]

The http://www.dodgecoronet57.com/images/flemblem.jpg Forum (www.forwardlook.net/forums (http://www.forwardlook.net/forums)) handles these types of threads via a separate "category" entitled "Family In Fins" ... with the sub-title: "When tragedy strikes, we all pitch in and lend a helping hand."

This separate category keeps the Forward Look main Discussion Forums on topic (i.e., keeps the threads focused on 1955-1961 MoPars).

Ryan ... perhaps you should consider creating a similar "category" under the H.A.M.B. "Community 6" pull-down menu ... that way, when one of these "Death, disease, & sickness" type thread pops up on the main board, the moderators can just move the thread to this "category" (vice closing or deleting it) ... maybe the "HAMB Chapel" social group could moderate this new "category" ????

Then again, I'll admit that I actually appreciate it when someone posts the passing of a Hot Rodding, Racing, or Customizing legend on the main board ... we're losing more and more of these old-timers all the time ... and these "Obit" type threads serve to document the contributions these guys have made to our hobby.

[DE SOTO]

The http://www.dodgecoronet57.com/images/flemblem.jpg Forum (www.forwardlook.net/forums (http://www.forwardlook.net/forums)) handles these types of threads via a separate "category" entitled "Family In Fins" ... with the sub-title: "When tragedy strikes, we all pitch in and lend a helping hand."

This separate category keeps the Forward Look main Discussion Forums on topic (i.e., keeps the threads focused on 1955-1961 MoPars).

Ryan ... perhaps you should consider creating a similar "category" under the H.A.M.B. "Community 6" pull-down menu ... that way, when one of these "Death, disease, & sickness" type thread pops up on the main board, the moderators can just move the thread to this "category" (vice closing or deleting it) ... maybe the "HAMB Chapel" social group could moderate this new "category" ????

Then again, I'll admit that I actually appreciate it when someone posts the passing of a Hot Rodding, Racing, or Customizing legend on the main board ... we're losing more and more of these old-timers all the time ... and these "Obit" type threads serve to document the contributions these guys have made to our hobby.


Now THIS is exactally what i was getting at, A seperate Column for such Postings.

A place where you can go and post up all the Upsets in the World, And ya go there only IF YOU want to.

Sorry if I sound Cold with this but I for one & it seems like a few others Just Don't want to be brought down by the Worlds Personal Tragedys & Problems.

And as Kilroy pointed out, I am not "Calling Out" or even singleing out 1 person or post.. This is generalized & confronts All the posts of this type.

Someone stated before how this gets people pissed off, I can tell you i am not Pissed Off, I think Kilroy may be ... But not me....

Just like in life i dont think i need to be subject to such things unless they are directaly related to me... Life has enough Ups & Downs to deal with everyone elses.

I Love My Kids more than ANYTHING and i can tell you 100% if one of them passed... It would NOT be posted on the HAMB or any other site, Thats my personal problem and would not bear it onto anyone else or the internet.

When i got hurt at work 3 years ago, I didnt Post it on here cus again, PERSONAL problem.. Many of you that know me know it was WAYY worse than 90% of the Crap posted.

Anyway, Its just my Opinion & don't expect it to change... Just had to air it out like the rest feel the need ... Maybe it will make a few less Posts when guys THINK about what they are laying on the rest of the world as they post about Death, Disease, & Sickness

[bloodyknucklehill]

I am new here and my posting on this thread may piss some people off (cause i'm new), but as i see it there is probably only three possible scenarios for personal posts like this..

1. Maybe the person in conflict isn't a "famous" hot rod/custom builder that we all know of but more of a home-town hero of the culture and community.. He/She may not be known to all but had a huge influence on said hot rodder..

2. Possibly not hot rod/custom related but the person passing,or in turmoil is the reason the person posting got into traditional hot rods/customs.. an inspiration of a life not wasted on excuses for not doing what thrills and inspires you..

3. and most importantly...... Maybe said poster has a hard time relating to other people but had found a common bond between hot rodders around the world here on the H.A.M.B. and really had no one else to vent to about their hardships.. alot of people around the world join this forum because we are like minded people and maybe some of them really don't feel like they have anyone else to talk to.. some people may live in an area where they are the only like minded person for hundreds of miles.. or they aren't exactly religious and don't want to go to the H.A.M.B. Chapel and get prayed for or preached at (Honestly no offense,i'm a good irish/catholic boy)..

Bottom line is I think Ryan is doing a STELLAR job of policing these types of threads thus far.. Seems like he has a good eye for the right and wrong things to post..And we may be a traditional Hot Rod/Custom community but we are still a community... We have to be there for each other in the hard times and the bad....

[bloodyknucklehill]

I Love My Kids more than ANYTHING and i can tell you 100% if one of them passed... It would NOT be posted on the HAMB or any other site, Thats my personal problem and would not bear it onto anyone else or the internet.

When i got hurt at work 3 years ago, I didnt Post it on here cus again, PERSONAL problem.. Many of you that know me know it was WAYY worse than 90% of the Crap posted.

I hear ya but put the shoe on the the other foot for a bit an realize that some people really don't have anyone else to vent to about this stuff.. And by God man if getting hurt at work got in the way of your building hot rods/customs, post it by all means.. Maybe some one in your area would be willing to help you out.. It's not a hand-out but a hand up between brothers/sisters.... Again it's the ties that bind us and if we won't look after each other who will look after us... I tried the macho "i'll take care of myself no matter what," bullshit and it will only take you so far....