Hell, that was funny

[Tony Bones]

Working on pulling some sliders off my forks here in the office at lunch time. Office is uppity corporate whore type, mahogany and all.

Got sliders off w/ out ruining fancy carpet and needed to talk to my boss about a project I'm on. Marched on into his office and he immediately started cracking up.

Turns out I had a grease streak down my forehead and cheek and one black nostril where I'd gone in for nose gold.

http://www.jalopyjournal.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif

[Mass Butcher]

Note to self: Don't pick nose with greasy fingers.
Got it...thanks.

One time I called a meeting with all my employees,(9 women 2 guys) and I stood up infront of all of them and was lectuing on quality work blah blah, and I noticed a few giggling. I went off and asked if they had something funny to share. Well they gladly shared that my fly was wide the fuck open. http://www.jalopyjournal.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/blush.gif . Damn Dockers!

[porknbeaner]

Life is good. http://www.jalopyjournal.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif

[TooMany2count]

[ QUOTE ]
Turns out I had a grease streak down my forehead and cheek and one black nostril where I'd gone in for nose gold.

http://www.jalopyjournal.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif

[/ QUOTE ]


ur fuck'n kill'n me over here....roflmao.... but then i can relate..joe

[Jkustom]

man anthony, sounds like you got a cool boss!

[Flexicoker]

thats hilarious!

not nearly as funny, but today all of Verizon staffing & diversity had a video conference with our VP (4 hours long!), well, I can't stay still that long and while moving around, leaning back, leaning forward, my skivvies started riding up on me hardcore, so uncomfortable that I couldn't bear it anymore, so I fixed my junk infront of several hundred people http://www.jalopyjournal.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif I did it carefully though, so im sure not to many people noticed, but I sure felt better afterwards.

[Smokin Joe]

1974, Tonkin Gulf.
I'm on a cruiser standing by in the radar spaces for captain's inspection.
All non military equipment is safely hidden away and the rooms are spotless.
Oh, SHIT!
Captain opens one of the bays on the radar and finds a set of heads for a harley! I'm trying not to shit my pants!
"Building a panhead?" he says.
"Uh yessir."
"You have more of it stashed around here where you think I won't find it?"
"Uh yessir"
"Is it all properly tied down?"
"Uh yessir"
He looks around the radar room some more, then says:
"Excellent, but try and leave some room in your radar for the radar."
"Uh yessir..."
As he's heading to the next compartment I hear him mention to the Division officer:
"I wonder where they stashed the frame?"

[G V Gordon]

Years ago I was working in a welding supply and got tagged to haul a large engine driven welder about a hundred miles or so.

On the return trip I stopped at a Quickie Mart for lunch, hit the refrigerated sandwich isle and chose a ham and cheese.

Up till they most of the microwaves were behind the counter so I took my sandwich to the cashier and asked if he could heat it for me. He said that it was self service now. So, I look at the microwave and it has this large dial with numbers 1-6 on it and the sandwich says to heat for 35 seconds. I set it halfway between the 3 and 4.

At about a minute and a half I realized my mistake and MAN was it hot. Not wanting to appear an idiot I went to the truck and headed home. When the sandwich had cooled a bit I ate at it but the bread was like leather so I tossed about half of it.

When I got back to the store everyone was staring at me with this odd look on thier faces. Didn't have time to talk, had to hit the can and get rid of the giant Dr Pepper I had consumed on the trip.

As I looked in the mirror I realized tha the cheeze from the sandwich had liquified and formed itself in long loops in my beard and hardened.

Man I was glad the cops hadn't stopped me for something on the way home. http://www.jalopyjournal.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif

[Tony Bones]

That's fuckin' great!

[ QUOTE ]
1974, Tonkin Gulf.
I'm on a cruiser standing by in the radar spaces for captain's inspection.
All non military equipment is safely hidden away and the rooms are spotless.
Oh, SHIT!
Captain opens one of the bays on the radar and finds a set of heads for a harley! I'm trying not to shit my pants!
"Building a panhead?" he says.
"Uh yessir."
"You have more of it stashed around here where you think I won't find it?"
"Uh yessir"
"Is it all properly tied down?"
"Uh yessir"
He looks around the radar room some more, then says:
"Excellent, but try and leave some room in your radar for the radar."
"Uh yessir..."
As he's heading to the next compartment I hear him mention to the Division officer:
"I wonder where they stashed the frame?"


[/ QUOTE ]

[Stevie G]

You ought to try that on a Submarine. Space is a little more difficult to find....but it can be done.

[Smokin Joe]

Yea, I know. My dad built an indian on the Thornback! SS 418 http://www.jalopyjournal.com/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif