The 2013 H.A.M.B. Drags

The 2013 H.A.M.B. Drags

On Thursday evening, he walked up from behind, grabbed my throat, and threatened to slash it. I turned around to see my smiling brother looking back at me. He had secretly flown in from the west coast to surprise me. It was then that I realized that this wasn’t going to be a typical H.A.M.B. Drags for me. With Keith Tardel in tow, how could it be?

Typically, I work my ass off at the Drags – before, during and even after. And quite frankly, the event has become a bit of a job that I fear and loathe as much as any suit dreads a boardroom. But with Keith there, I had no choice but to forget my duties and put all of my attention towards controlled hooliganism. Fun was going to be had one way or another – Drags be doomed or not.

The result of my negligence proved something I had suspected all along, but was to scared to test fully. As it turns out, the success of the drags has nothing to do with the amount of time I spending sweating it out in the background. In fact, if I forget to sweat at all, the cars keep roaring down the strip all the same and the smiles on the face of the spectators goes on unaltered. It’s as if my presence as a worrying coordinator means nothing. A great big nothing.

Without doubt, this discovery of mine proves something else as well – Carl, Craig, and all the folks at Mo-Kan along with my family (Marcie, Holly, Jill, Katie, Dan, Kevin, etc…) are the folks that are truly eligible to sweat. They make this deal tick. They make it happen.

So with this realization in hand, I decided to do something I hadn’t done in at least five or six years of H.A.M.B. Drags. I decided to sit down and watch some drag racing… And as Keith and I sat there and watched pass after pass, two things bubbled to the top:

First, despite the relative careless fashion in which we classify our cars and racing classes, the racing action at the H.A.M.B. Drags is actually really, really good. Drag racing CAN be an exciting spectator sport. Who knew?

Secondly, I think it’s time we take the drags to the next level and get a little more picky about our selections. It’s a traditional race, right? And just about every race that involved my ass leaving a seat involved two really traditional cars.

It’s a notion further backed by the hotel parking lot scene of Friday night. If you’ve never been there, I don’t know that I can properly set the scene with words, but imagine an asphalt honky tonk where just about anything goes… to a point. We’ve never really had anyone test that point until this year and when someone actually did, I think as a group we were all pretty proactive.

A burnout out of range of our cars and our children is just something that occurs naturally. A burnout in the midst is a different animal all together and something I can’t really imagine a seasoned traditional hot rodder even considering. The risk involved is… well, only everything.

And so yeah… Next year, we are gonna get serious about this traditional racing shit. You can count on that. And we are gonna focus hard on our veteran H.A.M.B. Drags attendees. Folks like, Nick that took his roadster from an idea to a class winner this year. Or guys like Kerry that fiercely fought his dragster for the past two years and finally won the war by whipping that bitch to 165 mph and winning the Kontinental Cup. To me, that’s what the H.A.M.B. Drags are all about… and that’s what we are gonna really strive for in the future.

There will be casualties.

Sounds dramatic, doesn’t it? And on a certain level, it might sound like I’m down on this year’s event and where the Drags are now. But be brave young man and read on…

At one point this weekend, I looked around and not only had my brother by my side, but also some of my closest and dearest friends. And I realized that they weren’t necessarily there for the drag race so much as they were there to support me. It was a huge moment for me. Just as big as Kerry’s 165 mph pass was to Kerry. And it was then that I realized that this is the most fun I’ve EVER had a H.A.M.B. Drags. I am completely and totally rejuvinated. And I’m about type something that I have NEVER typed before:

I CAN’T WAIT FOR NEXT YEAR’S H.A.M.B. DRAGS!!!!!!

……………………

Special Thanks:

1. Ryno. Jesus god man. Do you ever quit? Above and beyond… He’s the muscle of the H.A.M.B. Drags.

2. Keith Tardel. I introduce him as my “brother,” because well… That’s what he is in every sense of the word.

3. Marcie, Holly, Jill, Katie, Dan, Kevin. You can’t turn an event like this over to employees or even friends. You have to have family. And I’m lucky to have the best family a man could ever hope for.

4. Carl, Craig, and the entire Mo-Kan crew. They run the best drag strip in the country. And as a result, we are able to honestly say that we host the best traditional drag race in the country. Nothing else comes even close to the H.A.M.B. Drags… and it’s because of these guys.

5. Bill. Did you guys see the H.A.M.B. Drags auction table? Bill does this entirely on his own and with his own devices. He busts his ass at an event that he should be just having at in an effort to raise money for charity in someone else’s name. Selfless as a word doesn’t even begin to describe the man. If you were at the H.A.M.B. Drags this year, you owe Bill a pat on the back, a shake of the hand, and a thank you… Seriously.

6. Rashy. Despite it being 80-degrees all day, you still had us prepared for triple digits. Nobody forgot that!

7. Every single person that participated or attended the 2013 Drags… Well, everyone accept that one guy I met in the tower with $40 in my hand. You know who you are. I know who you are. And you know where you won’t be next year.

I know I am forgetting someone right now… In fact, one just popped in my head – Joey Ukrop. Our young journalist in the field… With any luck, you’ll see his contributions in some photo coverage of the event later this week. And if you were there, you probably saw Joey fearlessly snapping away from the guard rail. He’s boss.

I guess I’ve rambled on long enough. There is no beginning and there is no end. It’s just the H.A.M.B. Drags man. That’s how it is.

 

 

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