The Jalopy JournalThe Jalopy Journal #2
She woke me up with ghastly news. I sat up quickly, groping around on the bed for something to smash. “No!” I shouted. “That’s impossible!”
She shook her head. “I heard it on the world wide web. It must be true.”
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A recent emergency survey of our field sources indicates a firestorm of lunacy brewing on the hot rod front. Failure to prepare for this madness could tax our resources severely – perhaps to a breaking point. During the next few months, we will almost certainly be inundated, even swamped, by a nightmare blizzard of gibberish and swill of every type of description.
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Sometimes, I feel like a bottle of mace is due… maybe even rightfully deserved. This one is aimed at all of you.
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“I almost had a heart attack tonight when I looked over and saw you inspecting that jet engine with a cigarette in your mouth.”
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This is a big, wide world, and I have all of the action I need without adding yet another bull’s eye.
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Although a wild and lengthy court battle might have proved stimulating indeed, I decided after lengthy consultation with my lawyer that it might be best to clear this debt and go on to greener fields. Here’s your book and everything that I have. Don’t abuse it like I did.
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I gave you everything and you gave me $25.
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